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Re: Oh, I meant to add Pfinstegg

Posted by Dinah on May 24, 2005, at 20:56:49

In reply to Re: Oh, I meant to add Dinah, posted by Pfinstegg on May 24, 2005, at 19:41:43

I think all of it, the open eyes, the being ready to work, the greater feeling of security - different than the feeling of safety I felt before, are all related somehow. I don't know if my father's death made me vulnerable or if my therapist's caring deepened the relationship.

Does that make sense? That I've had a feeling of safety since the beginning. That I started to trust him at five years. And that now, at ten years I feel truly secure.

I used to have definite boundaries in therapy, and now it feels like there are all sorts of things that want to come flooding out. I'm not just going for my weekly fix of tranquilizers or mood stabilizers. Because he's good for that as well. But even though the pressure isn't as great as it was a few weeks ago, it's still there. Pressure to work. He's definitely noticed the difference and is giving me appropriate feedback.

I think I probably will go to three times a week for a month or so, and see what happens. If it goes back to being maintenance, I'll go back down on frequency.

But there is a small part of me that says one thing I could be working on is containment of those feelings of pressure...

 

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