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On the other hand...

Posted by antigua on February 4, 2005, at 11:39:17

In reply to Absolutely., posted by Susan47 on February 3, 2005, at 16:02:08

Well, here I am to throw a little rain on your parade.

Here's my list:

1. I had rocky road w/my T when we first started, until we settled on our routine. Called her on the wrong numbers and since it was summer only saw her once, or maybe twice, until her humongous 16-wk summer break, followed by weeks off to get her child ready for school (I'm exaggerating) so that I felt very unattended to.

2. My T has physically not been there a few times (less than three, maybe?)that I've arrived when I know my appt was set. She fessed up twice, I think , and the other was my fault.

3. I make mistakes, too. Last week I showed up two hours early for an extra appt., but I swear she was wrong or didn't tell me!! Went back later and told her I'd just STARTED two hours early because I must have felt extra needy.

4. I've showed up and left because I was afraid I was wrong about the time (early in therapy)and didn't want to face her.

5. My T says nobody would use her if they knew how disorganized and scatterbrained she is in real life. I know how bad she is in real life.

6. The first years (10??) I was always absolutely punctual. Couldn't stand to be late, but I always waited anyway when I got there. In the last few years, I don't worry about it so much; I'm much more relaxed, I know I'll get my time when I need it. If I'm super punctual or super late we both know we've got something big going on.

7. She used to drive my crazy because, my God, she was human! She'd get sick or her child would be sick or her car would break down, etc. etc.

8. But she's the most compassionate person in the world. Coming to accept that she was REAL was a very big deal for me. I accept her for who she is because she has proven her worth to me again and again. She's there, usually but not always, when I really need her, but I've learned to accept that too. I'm not "settling" or making excuses for her, I don't think. It's just a healthier relationship this way for me.

I just told her she couldn't die when she went on vacation...

If it's a big deal to you, try to work it out w/her if you see something worth saving. You're strong enough to know the difference now so you don't have to rely on old hurt feelings.

Gee, I wasn't any help, was I?

I was wondering how things were going w/your new T because you've been pretty quiet about this.

Hope all is well otherwise. I'm good for today and very grateful.




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