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Re: Wierd T experience(long rant) B2Chica

Posted by 10derheart on January 21, 2005, at 15:43:45

In reply to Wierd T experience., posted by B2Chica on January 21, 2005, at 11:39:01

I, too, am a Christian, but let me say what just happened to you was so wrong. I'm surprised (though glad, of course) you aren't even more upset (but that shows strength and confidence in yourself - so good for you!) I hardly know where to start here.

ONLY someone who *openly* advertises as a Christian counselor should EVER bring up many of the things she did - especially in a first session. And even then, at the expense of letting the client talk about what she's there for?! I don't think so. In a secular setting, no matter her beliefs, these things should perhaps never come up - depending on the client's desires. Yes - it's an integral part of Christian life to find opportunities to tell others about your faith. But IMO this is NOT the time, place or setting to do it in! I can't see how a surprise attack, *using* her position of power and trust (which any T. certainly is in)and directing a person to pray, etc., is in line with Christian teachings. I feel like someone ought to apologize for all of Christian-dom or something. Sheesh!

We can't know, but it's likely she may believe God led her to her chosen work. Which should be a wonderful thing - for her, for God and all people she meets. As a Christian, she is in a unique and awesome position - and I don't mean to eventually be able to convert some people along the way in her career. No. I just mean that she will meet *so many* people - most of whom are truly hurting, and she is a a great position to care and to just - well frankly, love them. What you had wasn't loving behavior, and that's just sad.

As an example, both my former T. who is AWESOME, and my current T., who I like a lot so far - happen to be Christians. I did NOT choose them based on this, having no clue at the time. (I wasn't yet a Christian when I first met old T. anyway) However, later on I could see how this fact influenced both their attitudes, demeanor, and more, in the sense of them being kind, patient, peaceful, calm, caring and understanding. All core teachings of Jesus. (NOT to say any T. can't have these qualities without Christian beliefs - I *know* many do just from Babble. I'm just contrasting the two I've known personally and how they *live* their Christianity, with this person you met, who to me is misguided.)

I think a therapist who's a practicing Christian can and must help people of any faith, as well as atheists, agnostics,...I don't care (perhaps drawing the line at satanists...that's a tough one). My old T. never mentioned his faith. I found out by accident/coincidence, through others, after I knew him for over a year. I'm sure that wasn't easy for him, but was the right thing to do. In part, his restraint and being a Christian *emotionally* and by example, is what seemed to make him so very effective for everyone. But, if a T's church or personal relationship with God is such that they can't do this work without proselytizing, then they have NO CHOICE but to become Christian counselors only. That means up front, on the business card. No deception - that's a form of lying - for goodness sakes!

This woman should do her best to conduct herself in a loving, caring way - and this is not it! I doubt she could find any Biblical support for ambushing a client, dominating the whole session with her talking (!!) and passing out literature as you walk out. In her own way, she may feel somehow this is right, but IMHO, I think she needs a wise, Christian mentor to do an intervention or something. She does have issues. The irony is: how will this *tactic* either help potential therapy clients (which should be her MAIN focus) OR have the tiniest prayer (pardon the pun) of getting someone slightly curious about Christ? I'd say it'll rarely do either.

B2, you've been through a lot. I haven't posted to you much, but always read. Please hang in there. Perhaps in the future this weird experience will serve you well in helping someone else or...who knows? At least that's how I try to put these things in perspective. We learn, even from the most uncomfortable, freaky things, ya' know? Take care and keep trying. You deserve and *will find* a good T. You really will. Hugs, prayers and my best to you - 10derHeart

(Hope I haven't offended anyone. I am a fairly *new* Christian, so please keep that in mind if I've blundered here. My passion about T's awesome responsibilities gets me in a bit of trouble sometimes.)




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