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Re: Daisy? My therapist seems excited

Posted by Daisym on December 8, 2004, at 11:11:57

In reply to Daisy? My therapist seems excited, posted by Dinah on December 8, 2004, at 7:56:11

I don't know Dinah, I think my therapist would argue that growing up is overrated. He would ask you - "what does that mean to you, exactly? What would being "grown up" feel like, or look like?" Being grown up isn't supposed to mean that you can or even should meet any challenge without feeling stressed, or sad, or frustrated. It also doesn't mean all work and no play. So I don't know that you can correlate "finishing something" with growing up. It sounds like you think he wants you to finish being a child. I think the ideal thing would be balancing those childlike parts and the more mature parts. Taking responsibility for things, but allowing yourself to play and to need comfort. Don't we all envy the person who hugs with abandon and is willing to get up and do Kareoke?

My guess is that the emotional side of you is being taxed enough that there is a need for outside support beyond therapy. But this emotional side is easily bruised and skittish. So playing with Barbies allows her to "practice" some scenarios and maintain control over at least this world. This would be a safe way to provide soothing. And if this was the age where you learned to hide this part of you, it makes sense to me that you would go back to a coping mechanism that worked then. I know when we watch kids play with dolls, we try to see what they are working out in their play, but for them it is totally pretend and unconscious. It is an escape.

Perhaps among everything else, you are simply escaping for awhile.




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