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Re: A nice session to share Miss Honeychurch

Posted by Dinah on July 13, 2004, at 8:38:50

In reply to Re: A nice session to share, posted by Miss Honeychurch on July 13, 2004, at 7:35:39

Chuckle. I think I must have worded it less than well.

I *am* terrified at the idea of needing him less. It's still a loss, even if it's a loss initiated by me rather than by him. And I don't want that loss.

On his part, he was obviously pleased at what I was saying and was in a lighthearted mood all session. But he knows me well enough to know that when I'm scared of change, it's wiser to downplay the change and assure me that I don't need to make it. So by helping me realize I could fight needing him less and that he would help me, he was reducing my terror. And he was also making sure he wasn't tugging me in the direction of self sufficiency, which would have caused me to dig in my heels and cling. That was the reason for the tongue in cheek offer (though he would have honored it) that I could come in three times a week if I liked, and his reassurance that I would need therapy for years to come.

He just understands me really well. Telling me that it was great that I needed him less and did I want to reduce sessions right away would have been a huge mistake. By assuring me it was ok to stay the way I am, he made it easier for me to move a bit. Which is not saying I *will* move a bit. I prefer not to, and will exhaust all other possibilities first.

It's very scary to think of needing him less.




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