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Re: feeling abandoned worried LONG

Posted by Joslynn on April 5, 2004, at 22:52:40

In reply to Re: feeling abandoned worried LONG, posted by Joslynn on April 5, 2004, at 22:31:56

It's not about the appointment. It's not about the scrip. Those things are practicalities, and yes I will miss seeing him if he skips over me this month.

It's the feeling of being abandoned and forgotten that hurts. Especially from him. He was the one who helped me so much when I felt hurt by life and now he is abandoning me and I don't know why. I can't even get my pdoc to stick by me and care about me. What is wrong with me that I attract men who don't care about me? Doctors, fathers, boyfriends, the importnat ones always hurt me. What did I do wrong, why am I so insignifcant, that is where I get confused.

I should just die my hair blond and get a killer body and walk all over them with my high-heeld boots. These boots were made for walking. No man leaves me, I leave them.

All I wanted was one simple return phone call rescheduling an appointment. I left my first message telling him I had to reschedule around March 17. I cannot imagine what excuse he could have for not making a simple return phone call. He didn't even have to call me back in person, he could have just left a date and time on my machine, if I am so unpleasant to talk to.

I'm telling you, the high heels, the blond hair, maybe a fast convertible car, and screech on out of there. Ok, I can't afford the car, but I have high heels and my hair is almost blond. Just the help of a little peroxide and maybe then I will get acknowledged? Is that the secret?

I will do what it takes not to feel left, vulnerable and abandoned, I am sick of it.




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