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Re: was my messge too long? platinumbride

Posted by spoc on April 3, 2004, at 22:42:54

In reply to was my messge too long?, posted by platinumbride on April 1, 2004, at 17:42:33

> or was it inappropriate for this board in some way?

Hi Platinumbride,

I'm pretty new so I'm sure I can't think of anything about this place you don't already know, so excuse me in advance! But your title grabbed me so I just wanted to say I know that feeling. I've slipped into some long ones myself (and even not-so-long ones) where later I ended up wondering if I just sounded self-absorbed or something. I feel embarrassed if in my mind I was opening up and being vulnerable. But I think maybe I don't express myself from the gut/hip enough for it to even show that I am actually "reaching out."

Maybe in these situations it's just that there can be no rotating shift where someone is always watching to make sure each post gets at least a brief acknowledgement! And I guess the nature of this place is that we shouldn't expect one. Ironically, in some ways we have to be tough/strong around here, even though that may be the last thing many of us are. Given so much going on around here, things of certain natures may jump out at different people, and they assume the rest will be jumping out at and being addressed by others.

I'd like to figure out the "protocol" too. Maybe sometimes it's better to start a new thread, like in this case one about considering leaving therapy -- or about *you* considering leaving therapy? Maybe people have a sense of waiting for the initiating poster to respond back before the thread gets active and takes other turns? I don't know, I'm only guessing, and I probably shouldn't! And as a newcomer maybe I should be staying more on the sidelines for awhile anyway.

Now, uh, what was your question again?? Ok, you said any input would help! Mine would be that other than the obvious choices (stay with current "shrink" or drop him and switch); you really only have going ahead and asking him if you can see him only for meds; or, overlapping him for a few sessions with the new doc until you see if that is working out. Even at the low rate your current pdoc charges you, I'd hesitate myself to keep running up the total if you are really going nowhere. The other doc sounds closer too?

But you did say that you are "supposed" to be seeing someone quite frequently and I haven't been answering from that perspective, so this is incomplete. But if it were me I'd try a switch. Your current doc sounds amiable enough to even welcome you back someday. Maybe you could just call it a break if you could get that out more comfortably. Knowing as you do that you back off whenever quitting comes up, maybe you could first leave him a voice mail message noting that "I absolutely need some time to think, but know I can never stand my ground. So please bear in mind when you call me back that if I again defer, it is only from discomfort, not from genuinely changing my mind..." Maybe then he'll be more amenable when you finally talk to him about (wink, wink) "taking a break."

Good luck whatever you do! : )


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