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Re: contact w/T after last session

Posted by Laurajean on February 7, 2004, at 1:24:17

In reply to contact w/T after last session, posted by pegasus on February 5, 2004, at 18:18:39

Hi P,
I'm sorry you are feeling sad about losing your T. I was in a similar position last year....when my T of three years moved far away. I was so very sad by the loss...and feeling the same confusion about the relationship. you, she said I could email, but it was far less frequently than I would have liked. :) And it sometimes seemed more painful than to make a "clear cut." Plus, it was a bit awkward b/c I wanted to tell her about NEW T, and how T was going...and when I did write about it, she wouldn't respond to that part.

I am happy to say that a year later, we have fallen into a nice rhythm of emailing back and forth...maybe twice a month or so, and her responses don't seem so vital to my emotional life. We have re-defined our relationship, and as I have dealt w/the loss over time, it's been nice to have her in my life, although never in the therapist role again.

Just know that the sadness won't last forever...and for me, it was an important lesson in endings and attachment--that the attachment can still go on, even if the relationship changes in very real ways. I hope you work through it, and if you do want him in your life in some capacity, then I would keep contact.

Or if you need some "time off" maybe give yourself a couple months break and then see if you feel like picking it back up again. Also, if you're unsure about the expectations of how much to email or content...just ask! I did that after I didn't hear from her for like a month, and she just let me know she had been out of the country and apologized for not letting me know.

Hope this helps,




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poster:Laurajean thread:309907