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Re: I Agree With Dinah

Posted by crushedout on September 2, 2003, at 13:26:52

In reply to I Agree With Dinah, posted by Rigby on September 2, 2003, at 12:36:41

I'm also not sure whether she's confessing sexual energy coming from her, or whether I'm reading that into it wishfully. She definitely said she found me very beautiful, and I believe she talked about the sexual energy "between us" (which to me suggested it was mutual, but again, maybe that's wishful thinking).

I guess what I'm wondering is that if she's clear with me that we're never going to act on it, might there be a good reason for admitting her feelings to me, even tangentially? I'm not sure. I guess I need to ask her about this. But I'm afraid to, because I don't want her to put up boundaries. I keep hoping that she'll run off and marry me.

> If she's confessing sexual energy coming from her then it's dicey. There is really no good reason for her to divulge this one or way or the other. If she says "Yes" she gets your hopes up (she's not allowed to be sexual with a client) and if she says "No" you feel rejected. She's supposed to explore your feelings with you and not aknowledge one way or the other how she feels.
> I felt energy with my therapist too. The most she said was that I was special, that she was closer to me than her other clients and a few times she's mentioned something about "beauty" and stuff. All probably pushing the line and she's apologized for it. If yours is actually coming out and admitting sexual energy, etc. then you've got either an inexperienced therapist and/or not a very competent one.
> Just curious: are you both gay? In my situation I'm lesbian, my therapist is bi-sexual.
> I also think Dinah's recc on the book is great--it'll help you figure things out and make you run for the hills in terms of exploring a relationship outside of therapy!
> Rigby




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