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Re: transference confusion Dinah

Posted by crushedout on September 2, 2003, at 10:28:26

In reply to Re: transference confusion Dinah, posted by Dinah on September 2, 2003, at 10:23:46

Yeah, she told me a couple sessions before, when I was hinting at the crush, that it was her job to maintain boundaries so that we would both feel safe. She also said that the flirtation and sexual energy between us was kind of "scary." I really trust her, but I'm wondering why she's divulging so much. I'm really *glad* she is, but I know it might not be kosher. I'm wondering what her strategy is.

No, I haven't read that book, but I'll definitely get a copy ASAP.

Thanks, Dinah.

> It doesn't sound like the most boundary keeping answer she could have given. Part of what makes therapy feel so safe is the knowledge that we can rely on our therapists to maintain those boundaries with sensitivity and compassion.
> But I guess to look at it charitably, she could have been at a loss for words and so was honest. My therapist has done that a few times, but has always repaired it.
> If you feel at all like she won't maintain those boundaries, I'd run for the hills, or to a therapist who has more training in transference/countertransference.
> Have you read "In Session" by Deborah Lott? It discusses a lot of those feelings we have for our therapists, and the most appropriate ways for therapists to handle them.
> Just my two cents. My therapist is always careful to tell me that he can't be my mother and has no desire to be my mother. And that's ok, because I don't really want him to be my mother; I want him to be my therapist/mommy. :)




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