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Re: Emotions of the therapist

Posted by Penny on July 22, 2003, at 12:25:57

In reply to Re: Emotions of the therapist judy1, posted by Dinah on July 22, 2003, at 12:14:57

I think 'love' is definitely not what most therapists would feel toward their clients. I've never been a therapist, but I have been a mentor to some troubled kids, and I can tell you from that perspective - someone who was helping them through trying times, though I wasn't being paid for it - LOVE is definitely not a description I would use to describe how I felt. Even for the little boy I mentored for nearly two years, seeing him once or twice every week. I didn't love him, but I did care very much. I guess that's the closest I can come to understanding how my therapist might feel about me.

I was really worried when I told my old therapist that I knew where she lived what would happen. I was terrified, and my emotions got the best of me. She admitted that she was upset with me, but she reiterated that it didn't mean she didn't care and said she would "get over it." But, speaking to Dinah's point about their 'feelings' being more a reflection of us than of them, I still had it in my head that she was very angry with me, and it really sent me deep into the Pit. I apologized over and over, even when she was telling me that she was okay with me knowing. I had a feeling that she wasn't. That it changed things forever. Though I don't know how true that would be from her perspective.

But, for me, it's all about a kindness and compassion behind their eyes. When you tell them something that is painful for you and their facial expression and body language reflects what you've told them. That's what lets me know, I think, that they care.

P


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030711/msgs/244260.html