Psycho-Babble Medication | about biological treatments | Framed
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Posted by KrissyP on March 1, 2003, at 22:47:28

Hi, My soul hurts tonight-real bad. I feel so empty. I am frustrated and wish my life was just different. I wish I had the courage to meet new people, and fine some balance and just glow with joy. I am feeling like I am self-sabotaging my very own life by not doing things I should be. I want to lose weight-my smoking is getting out of control where my chest is hurting. Is this what my life is going to be like? I can't stop wishing for the good times of my past for the life of me-my soul is so depleted and I don't know how to get it back. As I type, thoughts go through my head about what I need to do to stop feeling this way. The only answers that come to me are a total blank and my heart sinks again. I pray for courage, and pray that I will not be lonely for the rest of my life. I live with chaos around me-I'm 32-but yet when I go out and get a place of my own again, I still think "Will things really be any different?" I have isolated myself and I know I can do better. I wish I had the answers but it seems as if I don't. It seems that I am all talk thinking the life I want will just fall into my lap-maybe I'm a spoiled brat?I just took my 75mg Effexor-XR and 2mg Klonopin-thought I would turn in early tonight because I can't stand this feeling. Did I do something to deserve to feel this way-I probably did. I look at my friends-all either married have kids or are working or both-I am not. I feel like there is a huge hole right where my heart is supposed to be.
I just wanted to share this is the real me at this moment, and I hope I wake up tomorrow feeling better. I am so frustrated but it's my own fault. I haven't begun exercise again, and I seem to think that everything is AOK but it's really not-who am I fooling? Kind of a somber post-I am sorry-I just don't know how to fight this.




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Psycho-Babble Medication | Framed

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