Psycho-Babble Social Thread 718145

Shown: posts 1 to 19 of 19. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

please help ..trigger

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 1, 2007, at 9:51:14

last night my husband ended the evening by whipping his drink into the fire place..
after i put the kids to bed i thought his behaviour gave me permission to do "what i wanted".
i played with his glass that danced around the room..
today i feel nothing ..i was "clean" for so long..but nothing..
what should i feel?
how can i go on not feeling anything?

i understand some wish i would not post here..but i have no where else to go in my life

 

Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing

Posted by ClearSkies on January 1, 2007, at 10:00:24

In reply to please help ..trigger, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 1, 2007, at 9:51:14

>
> i understand some wish i would not post here..but i have no where else to go in my life
>

JYL, I just don't believe that this statement is true. This is the place where we can put our feelings, or lack of them. Apathy is overwhelming in its scope - it encompasses everything in its path. Can I say that this passes? Maybe more like it fades away, at least for me. Sorrow, anger, concern... these awaken for me when the empty nothingness starts to thin and evaporate.

I can't think of a single thing that has helped this process along for me. I have my usual list of self-nurturing things to do. But I just can't be bothered to do 'em.

Happy new years, btw. Sorry to add my own bleakness to your thread. I am having a particularly hard time feeling much of anything right now except for hopelessness.

ClearSkies

 

Re: please help ..trigger ClearSkies

Posted by Phillipa on January 1, 2007, at 10:22:10

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by ClearSkies on January 1, 2007, at 10:00:24

Clear Skies me too what's going on? Med's don't work. Thyroid won't straighten out either. And JYL why wouldnt people want you to post? Love Phillipa

 

Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing

Posted by karen_kay on January 1, 2007, at 10:35:03

In reply to please help ..trigger, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 1, 2007, at 9:51:14

(((((((((((JYL))))))))))))

you do feel. sometimes it's hard to recognize (i know when i'm panicked ro upset, i go into 'cold' mode. and it feels like i don't feel anything and that doesn't even seem possible to me, but i realize i have all sorts of feelings and thoguhts going through my head. and though i couldn't begin to explain them or put them into words, i realize that i am feeling something.).

i'm sorry you're hurting (or feeling empty.)

jyl, i can't say what i want to. but i do feel sad. you're such a sweet girl, it doesn't seem fair you have to go through the things you do. i'm sorry i don't have the words. but please know i'm thinking of you right now.

 

Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing

Posted by Dinah on January 1, 2007, at 10:35:29

In reply to please help ..trigger, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 1, 2007, at 9:51:14

I'm glad you posted here.

Sometimes my body seems to protect me by keeping me from feeling anything, even though that doesn't feel so good either.

Then when I get someplace safe, all the feelings rush out, or trickle out. Safe for me is my therapist's office. Do you have someplace safe to feel?

 

Re: please help ..trigger karen_kay

Posted by karen_kay on January 1, 2007, at 10:37:20

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by karen_kay on January 1, 2007, at 10:35:03

about 'i can't say what i want to': just because i can't put it into words, not any other reason. didn't want to confuse anyone.

 

Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing

Posted by 10derHeart on January 1, 2007, at 17:02:11

In reply to please help ..trigger, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 1, 2007, at 9:51:14

I'm so sorry, you sound so sad and empty and frustrated. I have no great wise words to give. But I hear you.

I want you to post here. You are no better or worse than anyone here. You have as much right as anyone to post here. You should post here as much or as little as *you* feel comfortable with. Even if others do feel a certain way about something we do or don't do, doesn't make it right or something we must follow along with or accept as correct, or the truth.

Maybe a new year can bring good change. It's possible. It would be great to see jyl laughing again in 2007....(((((jylisnotlaughing)))))))))

 

Re: please help ..trigger

Posted by fayeroe on January 1, 2007, at 19:24:56

In reply to please help ..trigger, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 1, 2007, at 9:51:14

> last night my husband ended the evening by whipping his drink into the fire place..
> after i put the kids to bed i thought his behaviour gave me permission to do "what i wanted".
> i played with his glass that danced around the room..
> today i feel nothing ..i was "clean" for so long..but nothing..
> what should i feel?
> how can i go on not feeling anything?
>
> i understand some wish i would not post here..but i have no where else to go in my life

please don't think that you shouldn't post here........this will pass and things will get better. i'm just an e.mail or babblemail away.............love you, pat
>

 

Re: please help ..trigger

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 1, 2007, at 20:08:47

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger, posted by fayeroe on January 1, 2007, at 19:24:56

i took myself out of the game today with seroquel..hidding away.
thank you for the kind words and support.

 

Re: please help ..trigger ClearSkies

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 2, 2007, at 9:19:35

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by ClearSkies on January 1, 2007, at 10:00:24

sorry to hear you do not feel well cs..i hope things improve quickly.

 

Re: please help ..trigger karen_kay

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 2, 2007, at 9:29:32

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by karen_kay on January 1, 2007, at 10:35:03

kk..
thank you for the kind post.
i have been feeling bad the past few months and tried ignored it..but it didnt go away :(
i am so sick of my inability to enjoy.

 

Re: please help ..trigger Dinah

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 2, 2007, at 9:47:23

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by Dinah on January 1, 2007, at 10:35:29

d..
i am afraid i have run out of places to feel safe.
i do not know who to trust.

 

Re: please help ..trigger 10derHeart

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 2, 2007, at 9:53:53

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by 10derHeart on January 1, 2007, at 17:02:11

thanks 10der..
i have descided to post here agaisnt others wishes. my needs are more important than their anger..i hope they can see i have not been scared away!!!

 

Re: please help ..trigger fayeroe

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 2, 2007, at 9:56:06

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger, posted by fayeroe on January 1, 2007, at 19:24:56

thanks fay..

 

Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing

Posted by AuntieMel on January 2, 2007, at 16:11:23

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger 10derHeart, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 2, 2007, at 9:53:53

Please don't be scared away. I miss you when you are gone.

Hold on, babe. Hold on. Email me if you want.

 

Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing

Posted by Kath on January 3, 2007, at 20:51:46

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger 10derHeart, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 2, 2007, at 9:53:53

Jeez Jyl,

I hope you keep posting. The replies to your first post in this 'thread' hopefully will show you that you have lots of folks here who gladly welcome your posting & have warmth & support for you.

I hope you open your heart to that support & caring.

I don't 'know' you, but I'm sorry you & the kids had to experience that awful display of immaturity. ((((((((you & your kids))))))))))))))

Sweetie - nobody deserves to have to put up with that kind of thing. Your sort of apathy is a way for you to protect yourself. It's like being in a marshmallow sort of, I think. I bet there's one HECK of a lot of anger under there somewhere. If it were me, there'd be SO much anger that it would NOT be safe or in any way feasible for me to be in touch with it.

I wish I lived 'round the corner from you so I could invite you over; have you sit on my couch; make you a cup of tea; wrap you in a warm, loving hug that lasted for a VERY long time.

I send you my love, Kath

 

Re: please help ..trigger AuntieMel

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 4, 2007, at 6:42:30

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by AuntieMel on January 2, 2007, at 16:11:23

i am trying!
i begged for him to leave this morning.
thanks for caring auntiemel

 

Re: please help ..trigger Kath

Posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 4, 2007, at 6:46:19

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing, posted by Kath on January 3, 2007, at 20:51:46

thank you for the very touching post.
it is time i stopped allowing him to kill my spirit.
i thank you for your caring and support..
ill be right over with a box of kittens!

 

Re: please help ..trigger jylisnotlaughing

Posted by Kath on January 4, 2007, at 13:06:43

In reply to Re: please help ..trigger Kath, posted by jylisnotlaughing on January 4, 2007, at 6:46:19

HEY!!!!!!

I never mentioned any kittens!!!!!!!! LOL

Bring them over, but you gotta take them back again even if I beg to keep one!!!!!

2 cats are enough; I have one, Ginger, who is like a dog - he follows me around etc. My adult daugher, who is living with us right now, has hers, Ninja, living her for now also.

I hope you're doing better. luv, Kath


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