Psycho-Babble Social Thread 251809

Shown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Starting fresh

Posted by Penny on August 18, 2003, at 9:47:20

Well, after meeting with my pdoc on Friday, we've jointly decided to try weaning me off the meds and starting fresh. I told him that at this point, I don't even remember what the core issues are in the first place. I don't remember exactly how I got started on this long long road to many medications, years of therapy, etc. I mean, I remember being depressed, but I wasn't suicidal, when my internist put me on Celexa, and then she later switched me to Effexor, and then I saw my first pdoc, and so on. But at this point, I don't know if my problems are truly MY problems, or if they are problems caused by the medications.

Having sleep trouble again and still haven't heard about my sleep study. Left work early on Friday because I was feeling dizzy and nauseated and my head was hurting, and I have SOOOO much to do this week, yet here I sit posting on Babble.

Feeling kinda sad about the fact that school is starting - I always get a little misty-eyed at the beginning of the school year, thinking back fondly on my years of school (well, fondly about most of them anyway...), remembering shopping for school supplies, seeing my friends, etc. Especially fondly about my college days - moving back to Chapel Hill, seeing my best friend, our having so much fun the first few weeks, before we really got into the grind of classes. It was just very enjoyable and I always used to get butterflies in my stomach when I drove back into Chapel Hill. Guess what? I STILL have butterflies in my stomach at the beginning of the school year, even though I'm not in school. Not even taking any classes this fall. And I wish so much that I was!!!

Boy - to do college all over again. I really miss it. And it makes it hard being here and seeing the students come back, especially the freshman with all the excitement they're experiencing. I really really miss it. I can't wait until I go back to school full-time, though it will only be ever so briefly.

I have pretty much written off the nursing career. I was talking to my pdoc on Friday about my experience in the hospital and about my impression of the nurses, some of whom were fantastic and others who left much to be desired. Almost all of them had chosen nursing as a second career. And some, IMO, should have stuck with their first career!!! But, what I saw that was the most disappointing was the actual amount of patient contact they had - they spent much of their time doing paperwork. If I wanted to spend most of my time doing paperwork, I'd stay right where I am. :(

But the therapist thing is still sticking in my head, and I'm looking forward to going to the social work school info session next month. Need to go ahead and sign up for the GRE, which I will need regardless of the path I choose, and then make some sort of decision.

The other thing I've been trying to ignore but which truly bothers me about nursing is that I would most likely have to work under someone the rest of my life. I wouldn't be able to be my own boss, and I have always wanted to be at some point. That was one of the things that appealed to me about being a physician. I would be able to have my own practice one day. But as a clinical social worker, I could have my own practice one day - my former therapist did - and that would be so rewarding. Not to mention that I do truly enjoy listening to others talk about their lives. ;) And I would have PLENTY of people contact, and, yes, there would still be paperwork...

Too bad you can't really shadow a therapist...

P

 

Re: Starting fresh

Posted by Tabitha on August 18, 2003, at 13:28:23

In reply to Starting fresh, posted by Penny on August 18, 2003, at 9:47:20

Yes, fall does bring back a wistful feeling doesn't it? I don't really get that fall feeling here because it's still soooo hot and muggy.

I'm impressed by how thoroughly you're researching your career options. It sounds like you've got your heart set on being a therapist. I really hope that works out for you. Even if you can't shadow a therapist, you could probably interview some-- if you haven't already done that. One warning-- therapists also do a fair amount of paperwork for people's insurance. I think they have to write periodic case reports for a lot of insurance. (As a client I shudder at the thought that these reports are filed away somewhere.)

I've been to Charlotte but not Chapel Hill. I hear it's one of the really charming and livable towns in the U.S. My friend lives in Durham and I hope to visit both there and Chapel Hill someday.

 

Re: Starting fresh

Posted by Penny on August 18, 2003, at 14:18:22

In reply to Re: Starting fresh, posted by Tabitha on August 18, 2003, at 13:28:23

> Yes, fall does bring back a wistful feeling doesn't it? I don't really get that fall feeling here because it's still soooo hot and muggy.

Yeah, still hot here too (where are you located again?), but there's something about school supplies that just gives me that feeling of fall. All the pencils (even though I didn't even use pencils after my freshman year of college!), notebooks, textbooks, even crayons. Aahhh...a new school year. I can still register for something, and may do that, even if it's for no reason at all. Don't know what I would take, but I guess I could still take SOMETHING. I dunno...

> I'm impressed by how thoroughly you're researching your career options. It sounds like you've got your heart set on being a therapist. I really hope that works out for you. Even if you can't shadow a therapist, you could probably interview some-- if you haven't already done that. One warning-- therapists also do a fair amount of paperwork for people's insurance. I think they have to write periodic case reports for a lot of insurance.

Yes, as usual, paperwork would definitely be a part of it - but my therapist has hired someone to assist with the filing for insurance, which makes things easier for her. So that would also be an option. Dealing with insurance as a patient, though, sucks, so I'm sure that wouldn't change as a practitioner! :-b

> I've been to Charlotte but not Chapel Hill. I hear it's one of the really charming and livable towns in the U.S. My friend lives in Durham and I hope to visit both there and Chapel Hill someday.

Yeah, I enjoy living in Chapel Hill (well, I actually live in Carrboro, but the two are pushed together for the most part). I enjoyed Charlotte too, where I lived for four years. As with anywhere, it depends on the part of town, though *most* of Chapel Hill/Carrboro is pretty nice. Expensive, but nice.

P

 

Re: Starting fresh Penny

Posted by deirdrehbrt on August 19, 2003, at 21:06:34

In reply to Re: Starting fresh, posted by Penny on August 18, 2003, at 14:18:22

Penny,
I'm impressed that you are taking the steps to find out exactly what it is that you want to do, instead of just going with the flow, and letting inertia take it's course.
I would like to think that I might someday be able to live without meds, but I don't see that in my future anytime soon. What you described though, about feeling dizzy, etc. has happened to me when I forget to take my effexor for a day or so. It happened too, when at one time, I was switched from effexor to Wellbutrin.
You seem really brave and certain of your goals. I'm certain that you will be successfull in what ever you set your mind to.
Best of luck,
Dee.

 

Re: Starting fresh deirdrehbrt

Posted by Penny on August 20, 2003, at 8:19:15

In reply to Re: Starting fresh Penny, posted by deirdrehbrt on August 19, 2003, at 21:06:34

Thanks!

Yeah - I had the dizzy spells with Effexor when I would forget my dose, and definitely when I went off the med, but am having nightly dizzy spells, nausea, etc. lately, regardless (apparently) of my medication dose.

My therapist and pdoc are very supportive in all of this. I told my therapist about the medication plan last night and she said she was okay with that because she knows my pdoc is keeping a close eye on me.

But I don't know at what point I'll get to stop taking meds - I forsee being on them for a long time at this point. I just don't know what's working anymore, so we're going to restart with a clean plate and work from there.

In the meantime, I'm actually feeling pretty optimistic about things - wishing I was in school (especially as I heard new students talking on the bus this morning on my way to work!), but knowing that I will be, again, at some point. And my therapist was really helpful last night, as usual. I see her again tomorrow night and then my pdoc on Thursday.

Do wish I could get a grasp on things a bit better though. I feel like life is slipping through my fingers...

P


This is the end of the thread.


Show another thread

URL of post in thread:


Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ


[dr. bob] Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD, bob@dr-bob.org

Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.