Psycho-Babble Social Thread 10888

Shown: posts 1 to 22 of 22. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 17:23:12

Hi Everybody ...

It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.

I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.

What would you do?

XXX, E.

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by Krazy Kat on September 6, 2001, at 17:57:03

In reply to Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 17:23:12

> It's the invasiveness more than anything, isn't it?

I don't know the correct legal answer, but I personally would just resign - it's kind of got a bad aura about it now.

- K.

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by Adam on September 6, 2001, at 17:59:05

In reply to Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 17:23:12

Well, you could try asking your doctor to write something vague. "Given Ms. So-and-so's current condition, it is my judgement that she should be given time to receive the appropriate treatments, signed Whoever, MD."

An appropriately vague but official letterhead (XYZ Hospital - omitting the department, for instance) would probably nix all further questions.

> Hi Everybody ...
>
> It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
>
> I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
>
> What would you do?
>
> XXX, E.

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by sar on September 6, 2001, at 18:51:16

In reply to Re: Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Adam on September 6, 2001, at 17:59:05

i was excused twice for a week each from work by notes from hosptals signed by "So and So, MD." for all they know i was getting a facelift, or a lap-coli. no reason to let on it's all in the head...

sar

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by susan C on September 6, 2001, at 19:25:54

In reply to Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 17:23:12

> Hi Everybody ...
>
> It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
>
> I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
>
> What would you do?
>
> XXX, E.

Hi xxx-e

Did I miss something? I was thinking you 'volunteered' for ninety minutes a week taking care of the kids at the y in exchange for access to the facilities. You have been doing you part with the kids, but not taking advantage of the benefits, ie use of the facilities. Why, as you say, is it any of their business why you need to leave, and a doctors note? Do you plan to come back? is there an official contract involved in this reciprocal arrangement? I am confused. I guess, if were me, and you know how I and everybody here loves giving opinions, is I would ask for an explanation of the necessity for the request of a note from doctor..."Excuse me, you asked for a note from my doctor, could you explain why you need one, what purpose it would serve?"

The other comments were also things I would consider...resign, go somewhere else...lots of choices

Mouse with boxing gloves
Susan C

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 20:09:41

In reply to Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 17:23:12

In response to your comments/questions ... my concerns are that my doctor's letterhead would identify him as being with the department of psychiatry, and I'm not comfortable with the questions and speculation that would raise ... XXX, E.

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by Phil on September 6, 2001, at 20:25:54

In reply to Re: Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 20:09:41

Sounds like they are already speculating. But I'm generally very non-trusting of management anywhere.
Tell them you'll bring them a doctors note if you can see they're medical files.

Phil

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by Mair on September 6, 2001, at 21:35:44

In reply to Re: Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Phil on September 6, 2001, at 20:25:54

> It doesn't sound to me like you get enough out of this arrangement to put yourself through this aggravation. If you're not making alot of use of the facilities, I'd resign and tell the guy you might be interested in renewing the deal when you are better. You don't have to say why you're leaving and he hopefully feels a little guilty. Maybe he doesn't realize how one-sided the arrangement has been.

Mair

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business?

Posted by Wendy B. on September 6, 2001, at 21:41:08

In reply to Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Elzabeth on September 6, 2001, at 17:23:12

Dear Elz,

Since we're all walking on the village green tonight (see Town Green posts above), and since you followed my meddling advice last time, let me just say:

THERE IS NO NEED FOR YOU TO PROVIDE THE Y WITH A DOCTOR'S NOTE.

You are not an employee. You do not receive a check from them evey 2 weeks (correct me if I'm wrong...?) They have no right or entitlement to such information, and they can rot in hell! You are a volunteer, you haven't even worked out for weeks, you are not getting paid by them, and don't ever walk through their door again... This is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time...

However, I'm SOOOOO glad you got out of the dance studio thing... Do you feel better yet? Like a weight is off you? I hope so... Throw the Y the finger, and get outa there...

with a hug,
Wendy

> Hi Everybody ...
>
> It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
>
> I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
>
> What would you do?
>
> XXX, E.

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business? -- Wendy B.

Posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 7:59:41

In reply to Re: Is It Any of Their Business?, posted by Wendy B. on September 6, 2001, at 21:41:08

Thanks Wendy B. -- I *do* feel better about following your advice re. quitting the dance studio. It's getting so much easier to say no. Thank you thank you (and thanks to the rest of you for writing as well: Krazy Kat, Adam, sar, Susan C. Phil and Mair -- XXX).

I'm now getting ready to say a big fat NO to my pdoc who wants to increase medications that I believe are directly responsible for (a) heightening my depression (b) increasing suicidal ideation (which I never had before), and (c) making me physically ill (i.e., I can't eat, have abdominal cramping which has become so severe I can't work) and a host of other problems. I'm meeting with pdoc on Wednesday, and I wanna go off all medications and just start over from scratch. I think I can do it.

Any tips?

You're so good at this being direct business. :-)

XXX, E.

XXX, E.

> Dear Elz,
>
> Since we're all walking on the village green tonight (see Town Green posts above), and since you followed my meddling advice last time, let me just say:
>
> THERE IS NO NEED FOR YOU TO PROVIDE THE Y WITH A DOCTOR'S NOTE.
>
> You are not an employee. You do not receive a check from them evey 2 weeks (correct me if I'm wrong...?) They have no right or entitlement to such information, and they can rot in hell! You are a volunteer, you haven't even worked out for weeks, you are not getting paid by them, and don't ever walk through their door again... This is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time...
>
> However, I'm SOOOOO glad you got out of the dance studio thing... Do you feel better yet? Like a weight is off you? I hope so... Throw the Y the finger, and get outa there...
>
> with a hug,
> Wendy
>
>
>
> > Hi Everybody ...
> >
> > It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
> >
> > I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
> >
> > What would you do?
> >
> > XXX, E.

 

Re: Is It Any of Their Business? -- Wendy B.

Posted by susan C on September 7, 2001, at 11:46:22

In reply to Re: Is It Any of Their Business? -- Wendy B. , posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 7:59:41

Elz, You are welcome, if you do do a med flush, keep the computer on this station and keep us posted on how you are feeling. Keep a running journal, blather nonsense, yell, scream, be nice, ask for help, just keep in touch, girl. Make sure your doc is available so if you hit rough patches you have her/him available.

Major Mouse signing off 10 4 good buddy

Susan C

> Thanks Wendy B. -- I *do* feel better about following your advice re. quitting the dance studio. It's getting so much easier to say no. Thank you thank you (and thanks to the rest of you for writing as well: Krazy Kat, Adam, sar, Susan C. Phil and Mair -- XXX).
>
> I'm now getting ready to say a big fat NO to my pdoc who wants to increase medications that I believe are directly responsible for (a) heightening my depression (b) increasing suicidal ideation (which I never had before), and (c) making me physically ill (i.e., I can't eat, have abdominal cramping which has become so severe I can't work) and a host of other problems. I'm meeting with pdoc on Wednesday, and I wanna go off all medications and just start over from scratch. I think I can do it.
>
> Any tips?
>
> You're so good at this being direct business. :-)
>
> XXX, E.
>
> XXX, E.
>
>
>
> > Dear Elz,
> >
> > Since we're all walking on the village green tonight (see Town Green posts above), and since you followed my meddling advice last time, let me just say:
> >
> > THERE IS NO NEED FOR YOU TO PROVIDE THE Y WITH A DOCTOR'S NOTE.
> >
> > You are not an employee. You do not receive a check from them evey 2 weeks (correct me if I'm wrong...?) They have no right or entitlement to such information, and they can rot in hell! You are a volunteer, you haven't even worked out for weeks, you are not getting paid by them, and don't ever walk through their door again... This is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time...
> >
> > However, I'm SOOOOO glad you got out of the dance studio thing... Do you feel better yet? Like a weight is off you? I hope so... Throw the Y the finger, and get outa there...
> >
> > with a hug,
> > Wendy
> >
> >
> >
> > > Hi Everybody ...
> > >
> > > It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
> > >
> > > I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
> > >
> > > What would you do?
> > >
> > > XXX, E.

 

Help -- How to AMA? and General Update

Posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 13:07:56

In reply to Re: Is It Any of Their Business? -- Wendy B. , posted by susan C on September 7, 2001, at 11:46:22

I saw my internist this morning. Well, not "my" internist. She wasn't available, but one of the MDs on her team. Anyhow, I'm writing both here and on the Rx Babble board, so forgive me if you're hearing this in stereo.

Anyhow, I've been having such bad abdominal cramping I haven't been able to work .... Yesterday I thought for sure, my womb was going to fall right out of my body -- I've taken to wearing a -- gasp -- a girdle kind of thing! Anyhow, it turns out it's not my uterus, and -- thank Heavens -- I don't need a hysterectomy -- it's a G.I. thing (but it's still pretty serious).

No wonder! I'm not eating, I'm not -- um -- eliminating. It's that -- I'm sure of it -- it's that d*mn Topamax. I'm so sick of it. That Rx is starting to feel like poison to me. So last night I skipped my second dose (by the time I realized I'd forgotten it was already 10 p.m) -- and you know? I think I'll just start weaning myself off AMA, assuming my pdoc won't help me out.

I guess I've slipped to the otherside now, starting to view doctors not so much as helpers these days, but to see them with with more of a skeptical eye. If I'm depressed ON medication, and depressed OFF medication -- what's the difference? At least without drugs in my system I don't have all those side effects. Maybe I can tackle my problems with a different -- with a stronger cognitive approach. You know? Maybe my medicine can be running, yoga, journaling, meditating .... What do you guys think???

Help you guys, I'm meeting my new pdoc on Wednesday for our 2nd only appointment. He obviously doesn't know me, but I'm sure he'll feel he does.

Why are docs such advocates for prescribing Rx and/or mixing up the mix???

I'm tired of being an experiment. How can I advocate for an F-ing break from drugs?
:-(

XXX, E.

Elz, You are welcome, if you do do a med flush, keep the computer on this station and keep us posted on how you are feeling. Keep a running journal, blather nonsense, yell, scream, be nice, ask for help, just keep in touch, girl. Make sure your doc is available so if you hit rough patches you have her/him available.
>
> Major Mouse signing off 10 4 good buddy
>
> Susan C
>
> > Thanks Wendy B. -- I *do* feel better about following your advice re. quitting the dance studio. It's getting so much easier to say no. Thank you thank you (and thanks to the rest of you for writing as well: Krazy Kat, Adam, sar, Susan C. Phil and Mair -- XXX).
> >
> > I'm now getting ready to say a big fat NO to my pdoc who wants to increase medications that I believe are directly responsible for (a) heightening my depression (b) increasing suicidal ideation (which I never had before), and (c) making me physically ill (i.e., I can't eat, have abdominal cramping which has become so severe I can't work) and a host of other problems. I'm meeting with pdoc on Wednesday, and I wanna go off all medications and just start over from scratch. I think I can do it.
> >
> > Any tips?
> >
> > You're so good at this being direct business. :-)
> >
> > XXX, E.
> >
> > XXX, E.
> >
> >
> >
> > > Dear Elz,
> > >
> > > Since we're all walking on the village green tonight (see Town Green posts above), and since you followed my meddling advice last time, let me just say:
> > >
> > > THERE IS NO NEED FOR YOU TO PROVIDE THE Y WITH A DOCTOR'S NOTE.
> > >
> > > You are not an employee. You do not receive a check from them evey 2 weeks (correct me if I'm wrong...?) They have no right or entitlement to such information, and they can rot in hell! You are a volunteer, you haven't even worked out for weeks, you are not getting paid by them, and don't ever walk through their door again... This is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time...
> > >
> > > However, I'm SOOOOO glad you got out of the dance studio thing... Do you feel better yet? Like a weight is off you? I hope so... Throw the Y the finger, and get outa there...
> > >
> > > with a hug,
> > > Wendy
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > > Hi Everybody ...
> > > >
> > > > It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
> > > >
> > > > I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
> > > >
> > > > What would you do?
> > > >
> > > > XXX, E.

 

Re: Help -- How to AMA? and General Update » Elzabeth

Posted by judy1 on September 7, 2001, at 13:51:15

In reply to Help -- How to AMA? and General Update, posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 13:07:56

I'm really sorry things are going so badly but I guesss not surprised. When I was on my 6+ drugs not only did I lose myself as a person but had some pretty horrible physical effects. Unless you are floridly psychotic- and most people in that state don't right such coherent letters, (I know this personally) nobody can force anything on you. You are an intelligent informed consumer who knows her body a hell of a lot better than an internist who has met you twice. Alternative medicine is a viable way to go why don't you give your mind/body a rest and try it? I'm assuming you are not a minor, so go for it. Take care, judy

 

Re: Help -- How to AMA? and General Update » Elzabeth

Posted by akc on September 7, 2001, at 14:01:16

In reply to Help -- How to AMA? and General Update, posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 13:07:56

My thought is that you get a different doctor, instead of going it alone. I guess I say that because I found a doctor I really trust (two years into the relationship) -- who listens and never blows me off. I think dealing with this horrible illness is better with a well trained doctor than without. If the drugs are making you that sick, you should be pulled off them and worked onto something else -- any fool of a doctor should see that. So if this doctor is unwilling to take the time to hear you, find another. But there are too many treatment options available that you haven't tried and a good doctor would continue to work to find one that could help you. While I posted above to kid_A's "truly happy" question that maybe we are to feel some pain, there is a qualitative difference between pain and illness. None of us should suffer illness.

My opinion, for what it is worth.

akc


 

Re: I'm with akc on this

Posted by Phil on September 7, 2001, at 21:31:38

In reply to Re: Help -- How to AMA? and General Update » Elzabeth, posted by akc on September 7, 2001, at 14:01:16

Although it is your choice to stop meds, it can get worse.
I've stopped meds in the past, thinking I could meditate, exercise, eat better, etc. I've done shitloads of cognitive therapy. I've been on meds almost half of my 48 years.
Until something better comes along, I'm staying put and staying informed.
You can still take care of your health on meds.
If other therapies were really kicking ass, I'm not hearing many testimonials.

Phil

 

Okay -- Let Me Think This Through ....

Posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 22:29:29

In reply to Re: Help -- How to AMA? and General Update » Elzabeth, posted by akc on September 7, 2001, at 14:01:16

I'm hearing you guys .... I'm 48 too, Phil, and I haven't counted up the number of years I've been doing different drug trials. Just know it's been a number of different trials, and I'm still searching for that right combination. Let me make sure I'm not making any rash decisions. Let me make sure, also, I'm not playing the victim. I just wanna be smart here, and come out on top. Thanks everyone. As it stands now, I'm tapering off on the Topamax, thank God, with the pdocs (reluctant) approval. He doesn't think my G.I. problems are attributed to the drug. No need to get into an argument over it, I'm just glad to be getting it out of my system. We'll hopefully have an intelligent discussion on Wednesday, and happier days lie just ahead for all of us. Thanks for everything.

XXX, E.

My thought is that you get a different doctor, instead of going it alone. I guess I say that because I found a doctor I really trust (two years into the relationship) -- who listens and never blows me off. I think dealing with this horrible illness is better with a well trained doctor than without. If the drugs are making you that sick, you should be pulled off them and worked onto something else -- any fool of a doctor should see that. So if this doctor is unwilling to take the time to hear you, find another. But there are too many treatment options available that you haven't tried and a good doctor would continue to work to find one that could help you. While I posted above to kid_A's "truly happy" question that maybe we are to feel some pain, there is a qualitative difference between pain and illness. None of us should suffer illness.
>
> My opinion, for what it is worth.
>
> akc

 

Re: Okay -- Elizbeth.

Posted by Kristi on September 8, 2001, at 1:39:10

In reply to Okay -- Let Me Think This Through .... , posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 22:29:29


Hi kiddo,
I'm so sorry for you, I can just feel your mental anguish just seeping thru my computer.
I was in a dilemna somewhat like yours... trying a lot of drugs for depression, lots!! The side effects for them were always worse, trusted my pdoc when looking back now I shouldn't have. I won't go into the history... but I did what you were thinking. I stopped all the drugs and went out on my own.
It can be done.... if that's what you decide to do you''ll have support from us. I think the majority may think it's a good idea to stay on them..... I didn't get a lot of support on here when I wanted to quit... but I'm glad I did... so if you ever need the mental "you go girl" Im hear for you . You said it perfectly.... I was depressed on drugs/ and depressed off. So why be on? I do do yoga.., meditate, self hypnosis(Just learning)... and these things really do help... if you do do them and stick to them. Excersise is key too.
Anyway... hang in there and keep us posted. Did yo quit the Y? Take care, Kristi


> I'm hearing you guys .... I'm 48 too, Phil, and I haven't counted up the number of years I've been doing different drug trials. Just know it's been a number of different trials, and I'm still searching for that right combination. Let me make sure I'm not making any rash decisions. Let me make sure, also, I'm not playing the victim. I just wanna be smart here, and come out on top. Thanks everyone. As it stands now, I'm tapering off on the Topamax, thank God, with the pdocs (reluctant) approval. He doesn't think my G.I. problems are attributed to the drug. No need to get into an argument over it, I'm just glad to be getting it out of my system. We'll hopefully have an intelligent discussion on Wednesday, and happier days lie just ahead for all of us. Thanks for everything.
>
> XXX, E.
>
> My thought is that you get a different doctor, instead of going it alone. I guess I say that because I found a doctor I really trust (two years into the relationship) -- who listens and never blows me off. I think dealing with this horrible illness is better with a well trained doctor than without. If the drugs are making you that sick, you should be pulled off them and worked onto something else -- any fool of a doctor should see that. So if this doctor is unwilling to take the time to hear you, find another. But there are too many treatment options available that you haven't tried and a good doctor would continue to work to find one that could help you. While I posted above to kid_A's "truly happy" question that maybe we are to feel some pain, there is a qualitative difference between pain and illness. None of us should suffer illness.
> >
> > My opinion, for what it is worth.
> >
> > akc

 

Re: Okay -- Elzabeth

Posted by Phil on September 8, 2001, at 8:50:01

In reply to Okay -- Let Me Think This Through .... , posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 22:29:29

Elzabeth,
I think a better approach, for me, would be to wish you well and to follow your instincts.
I stay on this board because I care about people and I need support.
Maybe I can be a little more supportive and ask a few more questions before I assume someone doesn't know what's best for them.
Much is learned in this world from those who go against the grain.
In summary, Elzabeth, I care about you and hope like hell you, we, can fight this thing and somehow learn to find some serenity in a crazy world.
Keep us updated.

Phil

 

I Enjoy You

Posted by Elzabeth on September 8, 2001, at 16:29:55

In reply to Help -- How to AMA? and General Update, posted by Elzabeth on September 7, 2001, at 13:07:56

All you you. And I thank you.

As someone said, we all react so differently to the different medications we try, whether medicated or not, it's truly difficult to know what it feels like to be in one another's skin. It's just a blessing that we're here, that we're attempting to *hear* -- that we care, and that we're sharing. Thank you all for that.

I'm starting to feel better. Some of that "Oh my God, I feel like I'm tripping on acid" feeling is leaving my system (anyone remember those days?), and I'm starting to feel like me.

I'm cooking. My God! What a feat. I haven't made my bed yet. I haven't mopped the floors. Haven't cleaned up the bathroom. But I've been to the grocery. Twice. I've made a meal. Two meals, actually, and I'm starting to feel like me.

I'm looking at the many (many) unfinished tasks I have before me (and behind me), and wondering -- really wondering if I wouldn't -- truly -- just start finding some good, and start feeling better ... in getting things done -- one by one. In fact, I know I would.

I quit the dance studio (thanks for your help and support there guys!), I haven't officially quit the Y yet, but I'm not planning on going back. I'm also thinking of quitting my job with the school district (if can can call leaving work as a substitute teacher "quitting."). I haven't been able to get "in" with a permanent teaching position, and subbing is really starting to feel so subserviant. So unwanted, and so unwelcome!

So -- gasp -- at the not-so-tender age of 48, I'm thinking of going back to temp work. What else can I do? Maybe that's a new beginning too. Who knows what might come of this?

So -- I'm wondering, with all these new beginnings ... saying no to the things that aren't working, and well -- just starting over again -- and tackling, one by one, all those unfinished tasks ... hard as that is to do. Maybe with talk therapy (and talking with you guys) ... I don't know ... and just putting one foot in front of the other, maybe I can make a fresh start of it, and maybe I'll be okay.

What's the worst that could happen?

I think part of the problem, actually, is related to the sacrifices we make when we wake up on the other side of raising children. Does this resonate with anyone? How time *stops*, as a 30-something (or however old we were when our children arrived)? At least it's seemed so for me. Especially since I was doing it on my own.

Now that things have just gotten interesting, as my son's in his teenage years -- I'm pushing fifty -- and truth-be-told -- little in my life has changed. I'm still not married. Still don't house, career, pension, etc. You know, all that "stuff" we're supposed to take care of in our career-building years. I was -- uh -- I was busy. I went to school. I've been raising my kid ....

And all of this is a bit worisome ....

Anyone else dealing with these issues?

XXX, E.


* * * * *

I saw my internist this morning. Well, not "my" internist. She wasn't available, but one of the MDs on her team. Anyhow, I'm writing both here and on the Rx Babble board, so forgive me if you're hearing this in stereo.
>
> Anyhow, I've been having such bad abdominal cramping I haven't been able to work .... Yesterday I thought for sure, my womb was going to fall right out of my body -- I've taken to wearing a -- gasp -- a girdle kind of thing! Anyhow, it turns out it's not my uterus, and -- thank Heavens -- I don't need a hysterectomy -- it's a G.I. thing (but it's still pretty serious).
>
> No wonder! I'm not eating, I'm not -- um -- eliminating. It's that -- I'm sure of it -- it's that d*mn Topamax. I'm so sick of it. That Rx is starting to feel like poison to me. So last night I skipped my second dose (by the time I realized I'd forgotten it was already 10 p.m) -- and you know? I think I'll just start weaning myself off AMA, assuming my pdoc won't help me out.
>
> I guess I've slipped to the otherside now, starting to view doctors not so much as helpers these days, but to see them with with more of a skeptical eye. If I'm depressed ON medication, and depressed OFF medication -- what's the difference? At least without drugs in my system I don't have all those side effects. Maybe I can tackle my problems with a different -- with a stronger cognitive approach. You know? Maybe my medicine can be running, yoga, journaling, meditating .... What do you guys think???
>
> Help you guys, I'm meeting my new pdoc on Wednesday for our 2nd only appointment. He obviously doesn't know me, but I'm sure he'll feel he does.
>
> Why are docs such advocates for prescribing Rx and/or mixing up the mix???
>
> I'm tired of being an experiment. How can I advocate for an F-ing break from drugs?
> :-(
>
> XXX, E.
>
> Elz, You are welcome, if you do do a med flush, keep the computer on this station and keep us posted on how you are feeling. Keep a running journal, blather nonsense, yell, scream, be nice, ask for help, just keep in touch, girl. Make sure your doc is available so if you hit rough patches you have her/him available.
> >
> > Major Mouse signing off 10 4 good buddy
> >
> > Susan C
> >
> > > Thanks Wendy B. -- I *do* feel better about following your advice re. quitting the dance studio. It's getting so much easier to say no. Thank you thank you (and thanks to the rest of you for writing as well: Krazy Kat, Adam, sar, Susan C. Phil and Mair -- XXX).
> > >
> > > I'm now getting ready to say a big fat NO to my pdoc who wants to increase medications that I believe are directly responsible for (a) heightening my depression (b) increasing suicidal ideation (which I never had before), and (c) making me physically ill (i.e., I can't eat, have abdominal cramping which has become so severe I can't work) and a host of other problems. I'm meeting with pdoc on Wednesday, and I wanna go off all medications and just start over from scratch. I think I can do it.
> > >
> > > Any tips?
> > >
> > > You're so good at this being direct business. :-)
> > >
> > > XXX, E.
> > >
> > > XXX, E.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > > Dear Elz,
> > > >
> > > > Since we're all walking on the village green tonight (see Town Green posts above), and since you followed my meddling advice last time, let me just say:
> > > >
> > > > THERE IS NO NEED FOR YOU TO PROVIDE THE Y WITH A DOCTOR'S NOTE.
> > > >
> > > > You are not an employee. You do not receive a check from them evey 2 weeks (correct me if I'm wrong...?) They have no right or entitlement to such information, and they can rot in hell! You are a volunteer, you haven't even worked out for weeks, you are not getting paid by them, and don't ever walk through their door again... This is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time...
> > > >
> > > > However, I'm SOOOOO glad you got out of the dance studio thing... Do you feel better yet? Like a weight is off you? I hope so... Throw the Y the finger, and get outa there...
> > > >
> > > > with a hug,
> > > > Wendy
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > > Hi Everybody ...
> > > > >
> > > > > It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
> > > > >
> > > > > I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
> > > > >
> > > > > What would you do?
> > > > >
> > > > > XXX, E.

 

Re: I Enjoy You *You too, have you been listening

Posted by susan C on September 8, 2001, at 17:52:26

In reply to I Enjoy You , posted by Elzabeth on September 8, 2001, at 16:29:55

in my head, peeking in my windows, reading what I write, thinking my thoughts???? With some modifications, you could be me, I could be you, YES< YES< YES< all the things you say YES.

Yesterday I was hunting around trying to find information on who the three people were who were running for the school board. I have been 'out of it' for so long, no names registered...

There was only one of the three listed in the phone book, I called and only the son was home, so I asked if he could tell me why his dad was running for the school board...he said, well his friend asked him to. A current board member whom I know good things about. So, great, question answered.

However, as I was wandering through the school district site, I looked at the employment section. As, in 1975, I had finished my BA Ed degree...I thought, hmmm, not that I could or have ever, but, just for curiosity (mice are curious too you know) I looked to see how much subs earned...oh, my gauuuud. You CAN make more with better benefits-somewhere else...go down to Kelly Temporary right now...Teacher shortage, my a.. Tho, on the news yesterday I heard Seattle needed 123 more teachers, 1/2 in special ed, So, why don't they just hire the subs they are using...? Oh, Oh, you got me going.

You just keep posting and you will keep hearing from us crazy people.

Mouse on board the same boat

Susan C

> All you you. And I thank you.
>
> As someone said, we all react so differently to the different medications we try, whether medicated or not, it's truly difficult to know what it feels like to be in one another's skin. It's just a blessing that we're here, that we're attempting to *hear* -- that we care, and that we're sharing. Thank you all for that.
>
> I'm starting to feel better. Some of that "Oh my God, I feel like I'm tripping on acid" feeling is leaving my system (anyone remember those days?), and I'm starting to feel like me.
>
> I'm cooking. My God! What a feat. I haven't made my bed yet. I haven't mopped the floors. Haven't cleaned up the bathroom. But I've been to the grocery. Twice. I've made a meal. Two meals, actually, and I'm starting to feel like me.
>
> I'm looking at the many (many) unfinished tasks I have before me (and behind me), and wondering -- really wondering if I wouldn't -- truly -- just start finding some good, and start feeling better ... in getting things done -- one by one. In fact, I know I would.
>
> I quit the dance studio (thanks for your help and support there guys!), I haven't officially quit the Y yet, but I'm not planning on going back. I'm also thinking of quitting my job with the school district (if can can call leaving work as a substitute teacher "quitting."). I haven't been able to get "in" with a permanent teaching position, and subbing is really starting to feel so subserviant. So unwanted, and so unwelcome!
>
> So -- gasp -- at the not-so-tender age of 48, I'm thinking of going back to temp work. What else can I do? Maybe that's a new beginning too. Who knows what might come of this?
>
> So -- I'm wondering, with all these new beginnings ... saying no to the things that aren't working, and well -- just starting over again -- and tackling, one by one, all those unfinished tasks ... hard as that is to do. Maybe with talk therapy (and talking with you guys) ... I don't know ... and just putting one foot in front of the other, maybe I can make a fresh start of it, and maybe I'll be okay.
>
> What's the worst that could happen?
>
> I think part of the problem, actually, is related to the sacrifices we make when we wake up on the other side of raising children. Does this resonate with anyone? How time *stops*, as a 30-something (or however old we were when our children arrived)? At least it's seemed so for me. Especially since I was doing it on my own.
>
> Now that things have just gotten interesting, as my son's in his teenage years -- I'm pushing fifty -- and truth-be-told -- little in my life has changed. I'm still not married. Still don't house, career, pension, etc. You know, all that "stuff" we're supposed to take care of in our career-building years. I was -- uh -- I was busy. I went to school. I've been raising my kid ....
>
> And all of this is a bit worisome ....
>
> Anyone else dealing with these issues?
>
> XXX, E.
>
>
> * * * * *
>
> I saw my internist this morning. Well, not "my" internist. She wasn't available, but one of the MDs on her team. Anyhow, I'm writing both here and on the Rx Babble board, so forgive me if you're hearing this in stereo.
> >
> > Anyhow, I've been having such bad abdominal cramping I haven't been able to work .... Yesterday I thought for sure, my womb was going to fall right out of my body -- I've taken to wearing a -- gasp -- a girdle kind of thing! Anyhow, it turns out it's not my uterus, and -- thank Heavens -- I don't need a hysterectomy -- it's a G.I. thing (but it's still pretty serious).
> >
> > No wonder! I'm not eating, I'm not -- um -- eliminating. It's that -- I'm sure of it -- it's that d*mn Topamax. I'm so sick of it. That Rx is starting to feel like poison to me. So last night I skipped my second dose (by the time I realized I'd forgotten it was already 10 p.m) -- and you know? I think I'll just start weaning myself off AMA, assuming my pdoc won't help me out.
> >
> > I guess I've slipped to the otherside now, starting to view doctors not so much as helpers these days, but to see them with with more of a skeptical eye. If I'm depressed ON medication, and depressed OFF medication -- what's the difference? At least without drugs in my system I don't have all those side effects. Maybe I can tackle my problems with a different -- with a stronger cognitive approach. You know? Maybe my medicine can be running, yoga, journaling, meditating .... What do you guys think???
> >
> > Help you guys, I'm meeting my new pdoc on Wednesday for our 2nd only appointment. He obviously doesn't know me, but I'm sure he'll feel he does.
> >
> > Why are docs such advocates for prescribing Rx and/or mixing up the mix???
> >
> > I'm tired of being an experiment. How can I advocate for an F-ing break from drugs?
> > :-(
> >
> > XXX, E.
> >
> > Elz, You are welcome, if you do do a med flush, keep the computer on this station and keep us posted on how you are feeling. Keep a running journal, blather nonsense, yell, scream, be nice, ask for help, just keep in touch, girl. Make sure your doc is available so if you hit rough patches you have her/him available.
> > >
> > > Major Mouse signing off 10 4 good buddy
> > >
> > > Susan C
> > >
> > > > Thanks Wendy B. -- I *do* feel better about following your advice re. quitting the dance studio. It's getting so much easier to say no. Thank you thank you (and thanks to the rest of you for writing as well: Krazy Kat, Adam, sar, Susan C. Phil and Mair -- XXX).
> > > >
> > > > I'm now getting ready to say a big fat NO to my pdoc who wants to increase medications that I believe are directly responsible for (a) heightening my depression (b) increasing suicidal ideation (which I never had before), and (c) making me physically ill (i.e., I can't eat, have abdominal cramping which has become so severe I can't work) and a host of other problems. I'm meeting with pdoc on Wednesday, and I wanna go off all medications and just start over from scratch. I think I can do it.
> > > >
> > > > Any tips?
> > > >
> > > > You're so good at this being direct business. :-)
> > > >
> > > > XXX, E.
> > > >
> > > > XXX, E.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > > Dear Elz,
> > > > >
> > > > > Since we're all walking on the village green tonight (see Town Green posts above), and since you followed my meddling advice last time, let me just say:
> > > > >
> > > > > THERE IS NO NEED FOR YOU TO PROVIDE THE Y WITH A DOCTOR'S NOTE.
> > > > >
> > > > > You are not an employee. You do not receive a check from them evey 2 weeks (correct me if I'm wrong...?) They have no right or entitlement to such information, and they can rot in hell! You are a volunteer, you haven't even worked out for weeks, you are not getting paid by them, and don't ever walk through their door again... This is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time...
> > > > >
> > > > > However, I'm SOOOOO glad you got out of the dance studio thing... Do you feel better yet? Like a weight is off you? I hope so... Throw the Y the finger, and get outa there...
> > > > >
> > > > > with a hug,
> > > > > Wendy
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > > Hi Everybody ...
> > > > > >
> > > > > > It's me again .... When I contacted the Y to let them know I needed a "leave," my boss asked that I follow up "with a note from my doctor." Doesn't that seem a bit excessive? Come on, we're only talking an hour and a half a week in the nursery to help out (and I wasn't getting over to use the facility anyhow). I'm not particularlyy comfortable asking my psychiatrist to write a note saying I need a break for mental health reasons -- and is this really necessary? Maybe I should just resign altogether, and just start paying the $32 a month to join -- or to join another facility.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I've already thought of asking my internist to write a note, but I know her. She wouldn't do it.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > What would you do?
> > > > > >
> > > > > > XXX, E.

 

Re: subbing » susan C

Posted by Wendy B. on September 8, 2001, at 23:12:10

In reply to Re: I Enjoy You *You too, have you been listening , posted by susan C on September 8, 2001, at 17:52:26

Dear Elz and Susan and anyone else who's there,

Are we all leading the same lives??? I am substitute teaching too.. Personally, I like it. The pay in this district is $80 per day, so I figure it's never more than 6 hrs per day, which would be $13.33 an hour, which is pretty ok. Usually it's like babysitting, and you only really 'work' for about 3 of the 6 hours, so if you look at it that way, then I can tell myself I'm making $26.66 an hour. Yea! See, it's all in how you look at things, like mom used to say. 'Every day is a new day!' Maybe this was why I never became a mathmetician... or an astro-physicist.

So, I figure the subbing fits my multiple personality disorder (not really my dx, but it sounds funny). During the busy times (not now, school just started), I go in every day and it's a new group of kids who need to be won over. I just go in, do my little dance, and go home, no worrying about the curriculum planning, no getting over-involved in the kids' lives. I do all age groups and all subjects, basically, music and art are my specialities. I have done vocal music with middle schoolers one day (age 11-14), and actually got them to sing, and then english to high schoolers, and then special ed for elementary the day after that.

The middle schoolers like to be bribed, so I bring in candy, and whomever speaks or reads or answers questions in class gets to pick up a candy at the end of class. Bribery can get you almost anywhere with that age group. The high school kids like to push you, so you have to stand up to them. I got one group of kids who were supposed to be watching a video in social studies, and these two kinda tough dudes ask for a hall pass to go to the men's room, and come back 25 minutes later! When they walked in, I just said: see me after class. And they say: what? what? we didn't do nothin'! And I wrote them up and they had to stay after in detention. I half expected to see them in the school parking lot later, but it was alright...

I guess I like a challenge... and I liked a different scene every day, maybe I just hate routine, fits the bipolar dx, actually. I'm very flighty... So I'll do it again this year...

Susan, you're right, it makes my blood boil too, to see how much people get paid to work with kids. Teacher aides and assistants here start at $6.72 per hour. And what gives with the supposed teacher shortage? If that were the case, why won't the state encourage more people to get into it, like pay for the college credits I need to get certification? Get this: with a master's degree already in hand, I have to take 18 *more* credit hours in 'education' courses, all undergrad level... Does this make sense? They won't even look at your application if you aren't certified around here... ok now I'm off on a rant, and I should quit now... ! More later...

Elzabeth, I hope you are feeling better now that you've punted a couple of things that were hanging heavily on you. When I did, it felt like a great weight lifted off me.

more anon,

Wendy

 

Re: subbing

Posted by sar on September 9, 2001, at 0:50:44

In reply to Re: subbing » susan C, posted by Wendy B. on September 8, 2001, at 23:12:10

my dear teachers,

my momma is a sub, too! even with 20 years teaching experience under her belt, she's been unable to find a steady teaching job since quitting her last one 2 yrs ago. her pay has finally bumped up to $85/day. she's really good with small kids (she'll only sub for elementary schools), like the pied piper of children (candy helps, yo) but she's really shy and (i think) dperessed so she's not jiving with the constant flux of newness. she eats her lunch alone in the classroom 'cos no one in the teachers lounge would talk to her. (she looks normal, smells good, smiles alot--but hey, i understand the other side, you want to chat with yr other bud-teaches, not the sub). anyway, she frequently comes home from the job pissed, and i wonder what could be making her so angry?

my dad tried subbing for awhile, he thought middle school would be his thing, but he sent kids to the office *everyday*! one boy started chirping like a cricket and wouldn't stop, he got handed a pink slip down to the principal. my pops couldn't handle the negotioation involved.

i've thought about subbing to augment my bookstore job, but please do tell me about it, details details details! (in my state, if you're over 18 w/ a high school degree, you can sub). are the little kids wild? i look 18 not 23, would i get any respect from kids any older than elem? i'd love to sub for a high school english class (where kids are old enough to not through spitballs, push each other or chirp like crickets), but would they listen to me? (looking 18 as i do?)

wendy..i was one of those kids...i used to go smoke in the restroom during geometry (i hate math), be gone for 10 or 15, then come back reeking of smoke like, "yesssss?" i was big into individual rights (or that's how i rationalized cutting geometry for my love of marlboro)

what kind of degrees do yall have? what's the certification process like?

props to the teachers,
sar


This is the end of the thread.


Show another thread

URL of post in thread:


Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ


[dr. bob] Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD, bob@dr-bob.org

Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.