Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 1047356

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Re: stuff going on alexandra_k

Posted by Partlycloudy on August 16, 2013, at 14:02:45

In reply to Re: stuff going on, posted by alexandra_k on August 15, 2013, at 22:52:13

I stay away from any competitive experience altogether. Don't even play board games, because of the horrific shouting I've endured from my ex.
I do yoga.
I look at the water.
I walk.
I am a total wimp.
That's OK, too.

 

Re: stuff going on

Posted by alexandra_k on August 20, 2013, at 21:39:39

In reply to Re: stuff going on alexandra_k, posted by Partlycloudy on August 16, 2013, at 14:02:45

It certainly isn't much fun playing with people who are sore losers. Yoga sounds like fun. I do it in group fitness, but have been having trouble finding a non-competitive instructor and the other people in the class tend to become competitive if the instructor is. I don't actually give a sh*t about how flexible other peoples hamstrings are... I don't even give much of a sh*t about hamstring flexibility more generally... I had a wonderful yoga teacher in Aussie though, learned a lot about my body from it... Made a lot of progress on my posture etc... I miss it a great deal.

I wonder what your passion might be... I suspect everyone has one... Somewhere. At least one... Probably the potential for lots of different ones...

 

Thank you Dr. Bob

Posted by Dinah on August 21, 2013, at 8:38:21

In reply to Re: stuff going on, posted by Dr. Bob on August 11, 2013, at 23:35:41

> Try not to feel responsible for things you don't have any power over. Hoping you learn ways to cope and find the energy to persevere,
>
> Bob

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20130811/msgs/1049420.html

I started a new thread, because it didn't seem "Psychology" related. But I wanted to make sure that you saw I thanked you. What you said was one of those little things that niggle in the subconscious before clarifying a situation.

I realized that I can only change myself, and can only choose either to get involved, or to feel responsible, but not both. My mother doesn't want me to get involved, so I have clarified the limits of my responsibility under those circumstances. That's really all I had the power to do.

Thanks for your part in my Ah Hah! experience.

(Hmmm... Maybe it is "Psychological" since one of the ways my therapist tends to help me is by implanting those ideas. Not this time. He's overwhelmed by my mother too.)

 

Re: you're welcome (nm) Dinah

Posted by Dr. Bob on August 22, 2013, at 0:12:14

In reply to Thank you Dr. Bob, posted by Dinah on August 21, 2013, at 8:38:21

 

Re: blocked for week alexandra_k

Posted by homelycygnet on August 22, 2013, at 8:19:21

In reply to Re: blocked for week, posted by alexandra_k on August 12, 2013, at 0:53:04

Thanks Alex. That was my understanding too.

>
> I feel kinda uneasy about this one, too. It depends on how you view your posting name. For me... A new name was about an attempt at rebirth. At a new identity. I know we have to post to admin that we used to post... But aside from that... I thought we were entitled to (entitled to is not quite right) our personal views on identity around our posting names. And what that meant or signified to us.
>
>

 

The moon is made of green cheese (nm) Dr. Bob

Posted by HomelyCygnet on August 22, 2013, at 8:21:27

In reply to Re: blocked for week HomelyCygnet, posted by Dr. Bob on August 11, 2013, at 0:50:43

 

Re: lol (nm) HomelyCygnet

Posted by Dr. Bob on August 23, 2013, at 11:28:53

In reply to The moon is made of green cheese (nm) Dr. Bob, posted by HomelyCygnet on August 22, 2013, at 8:21:27

 

Re: lol?? If this unusual exuberance keeps up Dr. Bob

Posted by HomelyCygnet on August 24, 2013, at 10:59:24

In reply to Re: lol (nm) HomelyCygnet, posted by Dr. Bob on August 23, 2013, at 11:28:53

you'll need to remove the "reticent" from your signature ;)

 

reunion

Posted by antigua2013 on September 1, 2013, at 23:47:32

In reply to Re: lol?? If this unusual exuberance keeps up Dr. Bob, posted by HomelyCygnet on August 24, 2013, at 10:59:24

I'm very late to this, but I'd be interested in some type of reunion. Would like to see how everyone is doing.

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion

Posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34

In reply to Psychobabble Reunion, posted by Dinah on July 17, 2013, at 10:03:35

It's been ages since I last came to this site - probably years and years. I think the last time I came was just after Bob visited Cape Town and came to meet me. Probably four or five years ago.

I remember I invited him to a strange awkward welcoming dinner at my home with friends of mine and friends of his, all psychiatrists and psychologists except me; I remember the next day we went for a long hike up Table Mountain and discussed psychobabble, and almost missed the last cable car down in the evening; I remember a green flash as the sun set over the Atlantic as we drove home; and a farewell dinner where he ordered chocolate steak.

I'm not sure why I stopped coming to psychobabble after that.

I was feeling sad and lonely this evening, and for some strange reason, out of the blue I googled psychobabble (I don't even have it bookmarked any more), and the first post I came across was Dinah's, talking about a reunion.

Dear Dinah, I hope you are well?

I suddenly felt a strong feeling of nostalgia and homesickness. Has the reunion already taken place? If it hasn't I would love to be part of it. I remember how I used to login here every day, often several times, and how I used to write to the Samaritans when Psychobabble wasn't enough, when I didn't want to frighten my friends here or my therapist with how bad things really were. At times they were really bad.

That all feels far away now. Things are better now in many ways. But sometimes I still feel lonely.

Please let me know about the reunion.

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion

Posted by Dr. Bob on September 29, 2013, at 23:28:15

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34

> I remember I invited him to a strange awkward welcoming dinner at my home with friends of mine and friends of his, all psychiatrists and psychologists except me; I remember the next day we went for a long hike up Table Mountain and discussed psychobabble, and almost missed the last cable car down in the evening; I remember a green flash as the sun set over the Atlantic as we drove home; and a farewell dinner where he ordered chocolate steak.

I also remember your warmth and hospitality and the enthusiasm we shared about the possibilities for Babble. What a pleasure to "see" you again.

Bob

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion

Posted by alexandra_k on October 2, 2013, at 3:45:08

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34

I remember you. I remember you were from South Africa, because I have a friend from South Africa and I remember thinking of you speaking with her accent. And I've been thinking a lot about 'a room of ones own' which was... Virginia Wolf? And I remembered that we used to have someone with a similar name to that here...

I don't think the reunion has happened yet.

I feel sad. Because reunions are reminiscing about the past. But I guess I need to accept that that is what Babble is for a lot of people these days. And it is what it is. Maybe someone will follow up on setting a time / place / date soon...

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion vwoolf

Posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:22:02

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34

Hi vwoolf! It's nice to see you.

It's funny that your participation with Babble ended after you met with Bob. Do you think it made it more real and less anonymous?

Your therapist was psychoanalytic, right? Are you still in therapy?

I hope someone does pick up the ball and plan the reunion. But in the meantime, maybe this could be a reunion thread for anyone who wants to touch base?

 

Re: reunion antigua2013

Posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:23:53

In reply to reunion, posted by antigua2013 on September 1, 2013, at 23:47:32

I'd like that too. How are you doing?

A few people have stopped by lately, which is nice.

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion

Posted by vwoolf on October 11, 2013, at 12:21:38

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion vwoolf, posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:22:02

I'm not sure why I stopped at that point. Perhaps it wasn't a single reason but a combination of different things. My life got much busier and fuller at that point, with friends I could open up to about my inner world, and so I had less time and felt less need for Babble. I had come through what my therapist proudly referred to as a very successful therapy and in fact I terminated around that time, and so I suppose it was quite natural that Babble would hold less interest for me. Did it have anything to do with meeting Bob? Possibly, but not because it made him real, although of course it did that. I really enjoyed meeting him and it felt helpful to me to be treated as an equal. However I also felt slightly different from everyone else on Babble, as if I had been singled out and made special, and I remember being reluctant to talk about our meeting. I remember wanting not to talk about the fact that he had come to my house in particular. In part I suppose I was afraid that people would be envious, but another part of me felt ashamed, as if I had done something wrong. The legacy of incest again, you see. Sigh. Meeting Bob was great, but it triggered old feelings.

Do I regret meeting him? Not for a moment. I think he should continue to meet with Babblers whenever he can. I think there is something very healing in this kind of encounter. I remember we talked a lot about Babble and how helpful it had been for me. I actually think it saved my life, and I am very grateful to the babble community and Bob for this.

You are right, my therapy was psychoanalytic. After I terminated I took about six months break and then began again with a Jungian analyst. This analysis, unlike the previous therapy, feels very smooth, and is opening me up creatively in the most extraordinary way. My life for the most part has become rich and complex.

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion vwoolf

Posted by alexandra_k on October 13, 2013, at 20:42:13

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on October 11, 2013, at 12:21:38

I'm familiar with that feeling, too. I think I usually try and rationalize it away or otherwise avoid feeling it. In some respects it seems beautiful, though. Thankyou for sharing. It helps me feel less alone.

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion alexandra_k

Posted by vwoolf on October 14, 2013, at 12:04:59

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion vwoolf, posted by alexandra_k on October 13, 2013, at 20:42:13

I remember you too. Aren't you from New Zealand? Weren't you starting post-grad studies some time back in a different country? Are you still busy with them?

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion vwoolf

Posted by alexandra_k on October 14, 2013, at 20:02:19

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion alexandra_k, posted by vwoolf on October 14, 2013, at 12:04:59

Yes. I went to Australia to study. Back in NZ now, finishing things up. Plan to start Bio-Medical Science in NZ next year. Maybe I'll be Dr Dr :-)

 

Re: reunion

Posted by antigua2013 on October 16, 2013, at 22:23:05

In reply to Re: reunion antigua2013, posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:23:53

Hello Dinah,

I hope things are well with you. I need to catch up with the boards.

Life has been pretty complicated so I had to stop writing.

Therapy-wise, I'm still in it, despite my best intentions to be done with it. In the midst of painful times, but I have hope!

Take care,
antigua

 

Re: Psychobabble Reunion

Posted by alexandra_k on October 27, 2013, at 15:29:59

In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on October 11, 2013, at 12:21:38

> My life for the most part has become rich and complex.

I keep thinking about this...

I have found myself wondering a lot about what the point is. Underneath or behind the defenses there is (for me) this awful fragmentation. So I have been having trouble understanding why it is that one would want to work towards doing them less, or whatever. I mean, I've really been having a hard time with this.

Complexity.

Perhaps that is it. A lot of my defenses seem to be about simplifying things. Breaking off a chunk because a bigger picture is too much. Too unwieldy for me to deal with, or something. But the cost of a simple bit is lots of little simple bits and a fairly fragmented life in its own way.

Anyway. I'm not sure if that makes sense. But this feeling. Ambivalence. Variations of something like that. Complexity. That is... Rich. And pleasing somehow. Maybe that is it. Part of it at least.

 

Re: reunion antigua2013

Posted by vwoolf on January 11, 2014, at 4:48:09

In reply to reunion, posted by antigua2013 on September 1, 2013, at 23:47:32

I'll be coming to the US for a mental illness conference next month, and will be in Chicago on 23rd February. Would any fellow Babblers be interested and available for a small reunion? Dr Bob, would you?

I would like that very much.

 

Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February

Posted by Dr. Bob on January 17, 2014, at 0:35:51

In reply to Re: reunion antigua2013, posted by vwoolf on January 11, 2014, at 4:48:09

> I'll be coming to the US for a mental illness conference next month, and will be in Chicago on 23rd February. Would any fellow Babblers be interested and available for a small reunion? Dr Bob, would you?
>
> I would like that very much.

I would also.

Bob

 

Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February

Posted by Dr. Bob on January 23, 2014, at 3:04:38

In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Dr. Bob on January 17, 2014, at 0:35:51

> > I'll be coming to the US for a mental illness conference next month, and will be in Chicago on 23rd February. Would any fellow Babblers be interested and available for a small reunion?

OK, here's the plan. Sun. afternoon 2/23 is definite and Mon. morning 2/24 is a possibility. If it's just Sun. afternoon, we'd meet close to the airport. So far, there's two of us. Anybody else?

Bob

PS: If you'd prefer to be more private about your interest, please feel free just to email me.

 

Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February

Posted by Poet on January 24, 2014, at 13:28:00

In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Dr. Bob on January 23, 2014, at 3:04:38

I could meet on Sunday afternoon and near the airport is okay. I'll just drive instead of taking the train.

Poet

 

Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February Poet

Posted by vwoolf on January 24, 2014, at 13:51:43

In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Poet on January 24, 2014, at 13:28:00

Dear Poet, I'm so glad you will be coming. I remember your name and quite a few things about you from years ago when Babble was about all that kept me alive.

It will be wonderful to meet a fellow babbler at last.

My flight is scheduled to arrive in Chicago at about 12.00

Looking forward to meeting you and Dr Bob then.

Best

vwoolf


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