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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on August 11, 2012, at 13:30:13
The old one was firm and even austere. The new one is soft and squishy. :(
I know the old one was falling apart. I could feel that a spring was not what it used to be in my usual spot.
I just can't get comfortable when I feel like I'm sinking into the couch. I have the feeling that if I sit back, my feet wouldn't touch the ground, like a kid's. And I like to sit at an angle to look out the window. Far harder to do that when I'm sinking into billows of couch.
I rather wonder if I would have stuck with him had he had that couch when I first came. Even his old couch was too informal for me, and I preferred a chair. If I hadn't been able to perch, if I had been trapped by sinking, would I have felt comfortable enough to stay?
The old couch suited my therapist better. He is also reassuringly non-squishy.
Posted by Tabitha on August 12, 2012, at 14:30:08
In reply to New couch, posted by Dinah on August 11, 2012, at 13:30:13
I sympathize. I hate that sense of the feet not touching the ground. Feeling grounded isn't just a metaphor. And imagine his poor clients with engulfment issues, disappearing into that big squishy sofa. Blech!!
Perhaps he could scatter some firm pillows around so clients could adjust the fit of the sofa? I always had to prop my left arms on the two firm pillows on my therapist's sofa.
Posted by sleepygirl2 on August 12, 2012, at 22:05:23
In reply to New couch, posted by Dinah on August 11, 2012, at 13:30:13
The furniture does make a difference. Optimal distance, support, comfort, all that.
I am a little weird about the surroundings in my t's office. I have to get used to everything.
Posted by Twinleaf on August 13, 2012, at 10:09:10
In reply to New couch, posted by Dinah on August 11, 2012, at 13:30:13
Sometimes progress shows up in the most humble places!
Posted by Dinah on August 13, 2012, at 12:33:19
In reply to Re: New couch » Dinah, posted by Twinleaf on August 13, 2012, at 10:09:10
I'm not sure how much progress is involved. I still feel vastly uncomfortable with the new couch.
Posted by Dinah on August 13, 2012, at 12:35:36
In reply to Re: New couch » Dinah, posted by sleepygirl2 on August 12, 2012, at 22:05:23
Absolutely! Distance is a huge issue. I had a lot of trouble with his new office. It's a bit smaller than his old one. But somehow I manage to picture the space as being larger than it actually is, so I must add some psychological distance.
I'm very protective of my personal space.
Posted by Dinah on August 13, 2012, at 12:39:28
In reply to Re: New couch, posted by Tabitha on August 12, 2012, at 14:30:08
He does have a few cushions. They don't strike me as firm, but maybe I can figure out how to use them to make myself more comfortable. He's got a similar, but larger, couch in his other office, and I make a point of wearing shoes I can take off when I meet him there. It's so much easier to just take off my shoes and sit crosslegged on the couch than it is to work out the ergonomic challenge. But that would be awkward on a more regular basis.
It's amazing what psychological overtones a piece of furniture can take on. For all I think of myself as being comfortable with him, that comfort definitely involves some firmness and distance.
How are you doing without your therapist? Any tugs to see her? Or a sense of relief?
Posted by Tabitha on August 15, 2012, at 1:37:39
In reply to Re: New couch » Tabitha, posted by Dinah on August 13, 2012, at 12:39:28
thanks for asking-- I've had some very small impulses to call.
My intelligence still tells me I need some more focused help right now, and not so much empathetic listening. Plus I finally started pursuing other supports (a seminar and a support group). She argued I shouldn't quit until I had other supports in place, and I argued that still seeing her made me less likely to pursue other supports. So I feel "right" about that argument now that I finally set some things up (plus getting a pdoc which is pretty huge for me).
I haven't called yet, and she hasn't called. I still figure either she'll call, or I'll finally decide I want to. But I don't want to go in for a session. I'm still angry at how much money I spent just complaining and not really getting anywhere.
Posted by annierose on August 29, 2012, at 23:29:27
In reply to Re: New couch » Tabitha, posted by Dinah on August 13, 2012, at 12:39:28
Dinah - I haven't been around all month - just busy with "stuff" but I empathize with the new couch and do I understand correctly, new office too?
When my therapist moved to a new office a little over a year ago, I didn't mind the new office. But the space between her chair and the couch was different as well as the angle. I still find it "different" - my brain reminds me every week - "oh, you have to look this way now". So I get it.
Have you mentioned the new couch to him as being different?
This is the end of the thread.
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