Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 393889

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Re: M. Scott Peck?? Is this an exorcism BBS?

Posted by Crackers on September 11, 2006, at 2:11:24

In reply to Re: M. Scott Peck?? Is this an exorcism BBS?, posted by cecilia on August 25, 2006, at 2:02:54

I believe that I am a victim of Peck's wonderful writings. Interesting things was that I indentified a psychopath. Sad thing is it's his word against mine and all I can hope for is poetic justice. Good news is that I think I solved World Peace along the way. Simple acts of kindness. Embracing everyone's religions, cultures, disablities etc. Don't we all just want to be treated with Respect and Dignity. I know I sure do.....to bad no one believes me. Or do they.
My poor psychologist...Charlie had to throw him on the sword before I was able to figure things out in my mind. Thank God there are some good men around!

 

Re: In Session

Posted by Crackers on September 11, 2006, at 2:30:55

In reply to Re: In Session » Crackers, posted by susan47 on May 28, 2006, at 1:54:39

Sorry to alarm everyone my therapist was just doing his job properly. Unfortunately I have been through so much damn abuse it's not funny. Started with a grade 3 teacher humilating me in class, at 14 witness another teacher abusing a student infront of the whole class, father promising me to keep my silence because I tried to kill myself. Having a boy psychologically abusing me at 14yrs. From 16-19 having a man teach me to be a salve and no matter how hard i tried to escape no one would interfer. Having my daughter's father's brother force himself on me. At 35 yrs old having a man i trusted strangled me during sex. Again, and again and again and again. Can't wait for Monday to see if it's the same teacher who did that to that young man. I wished to hell I would have been stronger back then all I could do is stand up and walk out of the room back then. If i can't get justice for myself at least I'll get some justice for some one.

 

Re: In Session » Crackers

Posted by susan47 on September 11, 2006, at 18:40:40

In reply to Re: In Session, posted by Crackers on September 11, 2006, at 2:30:55

You won't get justice for anyone. The most you can hope for is comforting the abused, the dishonoured, the helpless ... the ones who feel loss of hope because of what's been done ...
Do you know what trust justice is? I believe I do. I believe that true justice never really happens; or, (always leaving room for change) that it rarely occurs; it looks like this. The person who did the wrong (and sometimes there are several people involved in the wrongdoing) feels considerable remorse and regret, and his personality Changes. S/he realizes that this experience will never be repeated again, because s/he did a terrible injustice and absolutely cannot ever do anything like that again. Because the pain of feeling what s/he's done to someone, and how that person was so innocent of receiving that, will drive the Perpetrator to deliver a personally heartfelt apology And the open-ness of a new and trusting and kind heart.
So tell me, isn't that better justice than the law going, oh well, sorry, we can't help you, and if we do, first we'll humiliate you into having to prove yourself in front of this person here, who's absolutely within his or her rights to be a complete *sshole to you, to hurt you unbearably and scar you for a lifetime, a f*cking lifetime so s/he could get his or her jollies ... because a lot of people who do this type of abusing are only interested in self-defence, self-denial, self-aggrandization, and, quite frankly, they're so dangerous and sometimes so well-hidden that all you can do is huddle together in self-defense .. until you get a real feeling of how valuable you really are and always have been, and get to pass that on to his or her victims. So be there for them. You're awesome I hope I'm right, but if I'm not, I've projected a hell of a lot of great stuff.

 

Re: In Session

Posted by Crackers on September 24, 2006, at 15:56:58

In reply to Re: In Session, posted by Crackers on September 11, 2006, at 2:30:55

I wish only for poetic justice because the laws unfortunately have too many loop holes and 'tis a case of one person's word over another. But life still goes on for me...what doesn't kill me makes me that much stronger. Feel bad for my Therapist but he did his job, and did it well thank goodness for the descent men out there!!!!!!!

Also the pen is mighter than the sword, share your pain, report what has happenned to you. You may not get justice for yourself but you might be the stepping stone to help others get justice. I plan on writing a couple books: one about the relationship with my therapist, the other about the abuse that I have been witness to and a victim of.

PEACE, LOVE AND HAPPINESS

 

Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books

Posted by Crackers on September 24, 2006, at 16:02:02

In reply to Useful psychology and psychotherapy books, posted by Dinah on September 22, 2004, at 20:15:16

The Courage to Heal. It's a wonderful book and the title is true. If you are dealing with child sexual abuse issues it takes one heck of alot of courage to go down that road for recovery but it's well worth the journey in the end.

 

Re: double double quotes » Crackers

Posted by Dr. Bob on September 24, 2006, at 22:04:13

In reply to Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books, posted by Crackers on September 24, 2006, at 16:02:02

> The Courage to Heal. It's a wonderful book and the title is true. If you are dealing with child sexual abuse issues it takes one heck of alot of courage to go down that road for recovery but it's well worth the journey in the end.

I'd just like to plug the double double quotes feature at this site:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon

The first time anyone refers to a book, movie, or music without using this option, I post this to try to make sure he or she at least knows about it. It's just an option, though, and doesn't *have* to be used. If people *choose* not to use it, I'd be interested why not, but I'd like that redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html

Thanks!

Bob

 

Re: double double quotes

Posted by Crackers on September 28, 2006, at 16:31:26

In reply to Re: double double quotes » Crackers, posted by Dr. Bob on September 24, 2006, at 22:04:13

> > The Courage to Heal. It's a wonderful book and the title is true. If you are dealing with child sexual abuse issues it takes one heck of alot of courage to go down that road for recovery but it's well worth the journey in the end.
>
> I'd just like to plug the double double quotes feature at this site:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon
>
> The first time anyone refers to a book, movie, or music without using this option, I post this to try to make sure he or she at least knows about it. It's just an option, though, and doesn't *have* to be used. If people *choose* not to use it, I'd be interested why not, but I'd like that redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html
>
> Thanks!
>
> Bob


I liked it partly for the fact that it had dealt with both sides of the issue of recovered memories. I always had the fear that it was my dad who did it and it took me 10 plus years to have the courage to find out. It was my grandpa, the one I never liked but couldn't explain why I had those feelings.....go figure. He's been dead for 5 yrs now, and I have to say I'm recovering quite well from it. Plus I figured that there was no need to tell my family about it, somethings are best left in therapy.

 

Re: Help, Dinah

Posted by susan47 on April 25, 2007, at 18:45:44

In reply to Re: Help, Dinah » Susan47, posted by Dinah on March 19, 2005, at 8:59:31

It's been a very long time since anyone posted on this thread. I was reading over some of it. I'm almost through my dependency, I think. I'll probably always want to be loved and respected and cared about by that individual T .. even using the term "T" now instead of "therapist", or even "psychologist", seems extremely intimate, somehow. Like the way I call him by his initials sometimes instead of using his actual real name. I think we set it up this way, using that type of euphemism (is that what it's called? What's a euphemism? Eu-phem. You, Femme.
Hmh.
I'm just thinking how accurate Dinah was. It's funny but looking back at things, the thick of things, when I was in it I never actually saw it exactly for what it was, I just went blindly along on my feelings and my head, what my head and my gut knew but my conscious just couldn't absorb, I think I was too involved in survival. I wish every patient could know what can happen and Why, and I wish therapists would understand how important it is to have control but Kind control at all times. And never to reject a patient, never-bloody-never do that; I think if T's have to do that to a somewhat normal person, there's something wrong with the T's training or something else is going on, because there's no way a patient should have to be vulnerable to having this powerful emotional stuff sneak up on him or her. It's just plain unethical, when they know what they know.
Sigh.
If my ex-T ever did anything like reject me ever again I would have to scramble so hard to exist, again.

 

Re: Help, Dinah » susan47

Posted by Dinah on April 27, 2007, at 22:25:19

In reply to Re: Help, Dinah, posted by susan47 on April 25, 2007, at 18:45:44

I think yes, training would be a good thing. I'm sorry you felt as hurt as you did.

Now that some time has passed do you find the pain is getting less?

 

Less Pain » Dinah

Posted by susan47 on April 28, 2007, at 21:25:57

In reply to Re: Help, Dinah » susan47, posted by Dinah on April 27, 2007, at 22:25:19

"I'm sorry you felt as hurt as you did" sounds like a platitude, although I'm sure you're a very good person and would never wish to give the impression that you're judgmental. I'm sure you're very tolerant and kind.
What I heard you say, Dinah, was that I'm being judged for what happened with my ex-t.
I believe that dependence isn't something we can always predict; I also believe that we all respond in ways reflective of our past environments. We all take damage different ways, we all have different histories and pasts.
Therapists are supposed to help people, not to make it worse, and certainly not to stand blindly by and watch people deteriorate, and not do anything about it.
Therapists are supposed to be healers. They call themselves doctors.
I know no one is perfect. I work with doctors. I know.
But human decency will never go out of fashion.

 

Re: Less Pain » susan47

Posted by Dinah on April 28, 2007, at 22:53:48

In reply to Less Pain » Dinah, posted by susan47 on April 28, 2007, at 21:25:57

I'm sorry you heard that. That isn't what I was trying to say at all. But clearly I don't understand. I apologize.

 

It's Okay » Dinah

Posted by susan47 on April 29, 2007, at 10:42:28

In reply to Re: Less Pain » susan47, posted by Dinah on April 28, 2007, at 22:53:48

I am still very sensitive about the whole issue.

 

Re: M. Scott Peck?? Is this an exorcism BBS?

Posted by Tarzan on August 22, 2007, at 12:20:49

In reply to Re: M. Scott Peck?? Is this an exorcism BBS?, posted by Crackers on September 11, 2006, at 2:11:24

I have benefited greatly from his books. Particularly The road less traveled and Further along the road less traveled. Please don't be turned off by Scott Peck if all you know about him is what you have read in this topic. He defines evil, laziness and other things very diferently than what you may be use to. I suggest reading the first few pages of the road less traveled. It should give you a good idea of weather you should or should not read the rest of the book. We are all on different journeys, but for me, Scott Peck jumpstarted my personal never ending growth towards maturity. It may be worth your time to read the first few pages of the road less traveled and then go from there.

 

Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books

Posted by Dinah on May 16, 2008, at 19:47:51

In reply to Useful psychology and psychotherapy books, posted by Dinah on September 22, 2004, at 20:15:16

Whoops. I haven't been at all good about keeping this thread current.

But I really do have a question. I've devoured all my psychology books of the type I like best. Interesting case studies. Things like:

"The Mummy at the Dining Room Table"

"The Love Bug and Other Tales of Psychotherapy"

"The Man with the Beautiful Voice"

"The Taboo Scarf and Other Tales of Therapy"

"Schopenhauer's Porcupines"

"The Fifty-Minute Hour"

"Moments of Engagement"

"The Luckiest Girl in the World"

and of course

"Every Day Gets a Little Closer"

"Love's Executioner"

"Momma and the Meaning of Life"

I've just finished "Delivering Doctor Amelia" which wasn't a collection so much as an entire book about one case. I didn't have strong feelings about it one way or another.

 

Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books

Posted by Daisym on May 16, 2008, at 21:39:24

In reply to Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books, posted by Dinah on May 16, 2008, at 19:47:51

I loved that book! I've read it three times - but it speaks to me pretty directly on a lot of levels.

If you haven't read "Attachment in Psychotherapy" - I think you might like it. It has many case examples and talks a lot about why it works best when a client is attached and how all that looks like.

I just went to a presentation today on a psychological approach to Colic - it was really interesting.

 

Useful books- Dinah and Daisy

Posted by twinleaf on May 16, 2008, at 22:32:54

In reply to Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books, posted by Daisym on May 16, 2008, at 21:39:24

This has been a long-running thread with a lot of excellent book recommendations. I've read several- all very good, and just ordered the book on attachment which Daisy recommended. Thank you both!

 

Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books » Daisym

Posted by Dinah on May 16, 2008, at 23:06:34

In reply to Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books, posted by Daisym on May 16, 2008, at 21:39:24

"Delivering Doctor Amelia" is the one you're speaking of?

I might try rereading it. It was the first book I read on my Kindle and getting used to the format might have distracted me. What was it that spoke to you?

I think maybe the psychologist didn't remind me very much of my own. Or maybe his mixed feelings towards his client made me feel uncomfortable.

Thanks for the recommendation. I really need some more books. I've read the others so often. And attachment is one of my favorite topics.

 

Re: Useful books- Dinah and Daisy » twinleaf

Posted by Dinah on May 16, 2008, at 23:12:02

In reply to Useful books- Dinah and Daisy, posted by twinleaf on May 16, 2008, at 22:32:54

It was a thread I really enjoyed.

Also the thread where we read "In Session: The Bond Between Women and Their Therapists" as a group. We never did finish that book... Well, not as a group anyway.

 

In Session... » Dinah

Posted by twinleaf on May 16, 2008, at 23:28:12

In reply to Re: Useful books- Dinah and Daisy » twinleaf, posted by Dinah on May 16, 2008, at 23:12:02

No, we never did. But it was still extremely interesting.

 

Re: 'Sex in the Forbidden Zone'

Posted by sassyfrancesca on May 22, 2008, at 10:35:32

In reply to Re: double double quotes » TofuEmmy, posted by Dr. Bob on January 5, 2005, at 23:50:36

by Peter Rutter

I believe this is a book which should be read by EVERY mental health are provider.

My situation is that my t has "sexualized" our relationship; of course I know I should leave, but not ready for that.

This stuff is a HUGE problem, but no one talks about it too much. When the book was written, according to the author (10 years ago or more); there was NOTHING on the subject of erotic feelings, a t sexualizing a relationship, not to mention having sex with a client.

The silence is still deafening as to what goes on behind closed doors.

 

Re: 'Sex in the Forbidden Zone' - Amazon link

Posted by 10derHeart on May 22, 2008, at 17:45:59

In reply to Re: 'Sex in the Forbidden Zone', posted by sassyfrancesca on May 22, 2008, at 10:35:32

"Sex in the Forbidden Zone"

 

Re: 'Sex in the Forbidden Zone' » sassyfrancesca

Posted by susan47 on May 23, 2008, at 0:02:58

In reply to Re: 'Sex in the Forbidden Zone', posted by sassyfrancesca on May 22, 2008, at 10:35:32

How did your T sexualize your relationship?
I wish you healing.

 

Re: How my T 'sexualized' our relationship

Posted by sassyfrancesca on May 23, 2008, at 7:37:36

In reply to Re: 'Sex in the Forbidden Zone' » sassyfrancesca, posted by susan47 on May 23, 2008, at 0:02:58

Hi, Susan: Well, it is an excruciatingly loooong story. I have been with him for 5 years.

It is sexual innuendo, and also touching (no sex)......I could write a book on what he has said and done.

We both attended he same American Counseling Associations' conference in Hawaii a few months ago; he saw me 5 times, but didn't say anything (silly rules),BUT he attended the Opening Dance party, and spent a half an hour looking for me (said he would have danced with me!)...I was shocked he told me that.

A few of the things he has said: "If I were not married, I would probably go for it." You are in my heart and in my head" I am a fantastic kisser; I can go all night long." There are 100's of sexual innuendo/comments.

The miracle is NOT that I haven't acted on my feelings, but I haven't in SPITE of what he has said and done...to lead me on.

He is in a terrible struggle with himself, and has dragged me into it. He is supposed to do his "work" invisibly, etc.

Sassy

 

Right now I'm reading

Posted by Dinah on June 3, 2008, at 13:37:57

In reply to Re: Useful psychology and psychotherapy books, posted by Dinah on May 16, 2008, at 19:47:51

"The Therapeutic Use of Self" by Val Wosket.

In some ways, the book mildly annoys me. I think some of her interpretations of what's going on with her clients could stand some counterpoints.

For example, she used a feedback form and discovered that clients often come in and not discuss what they really needed to talk about. Instead they bring up superficial issues in order to avoid talking about what's bothering them. Her solution was to ask whether this was something they needed to talk to her about today, or if they thought they could handle this themselves. She thinks that the frequent answers that they can handle it themselves means that this is a good strategy. I'm thinking it more likely deflates the clients and makes them think this isn't something they should bring to therapy. Or at least that's how I would feel. And there are other things like that, where her interpretations seem rather convenient.

But I am loving this book because it really captures what it is that I'm asking from my therapist. It really captures the essence of being present in the moment. I've bookmarked several passages.

So this seems like the right book for the right time for me at this moment.

 

Re: Right now I'm reading

Posted by Daisym on June 4, 2008, at 1:19:10

In reply to Right now I'm reading, posted by Dinah on June 3, 2008, at 13:37:57

I just finished "Love and death in Psychotherapy." -- I pretty much hated it. It was a required reading book but I'm going to suggest that they replace it with "A General Theory of Love."

I think what I objected to the most was the author's use of "false" love and "real" love - both on the part of the client and the therapist. He really has a problem with any bending of the theraputic frame - definitely NOT attachment theory and technique. He thinks it is seductive to allow a client to make a schedule change due to that client's need. To be fair, he holds the therapist to the same standard.

His writing is thick and hard to wade through. The back cover cracked me up - something about "clear and concise" and for anyone who wanted new ideas to deal with this "most distressing" event (love that is). Even his statistics show that he goes against what most therapist believe.

The one piece that was interesting was the discussion of death anxiety and how it rarely gets talked about but is often a layer in discussions.

I wouldn't recommend the book though. One piece was not enough...


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