Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 698646

Shown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

It the world ending? My life is goin' to hell

Posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 4:38:07

I can't believe this is all went down in the last couple of weeks, but just when I am doing well, then wham!

First off my DH found out last night that his mother might have brain cancer. They have ordered a full body scan to check for it on Monday. My brother in law is hiding it from her until they know for sure, but I am sure she is thinking the worse anyways. My MIL is one from hell but I still do care even if I don't like her much.

Then my FIL who is married to my MIL who might have cancer, is wanting to refuse to do dialyses now because he just feels horrible anyways, he fell last weeks and doesn't have much use of his arms because he is so week. (he has been getting it for 2 years now) He is the one most of us have been worried about because is on his last legs.

Our family had plans to go visit right before Christmas and I was going to pass, and let my DH and our kids fly out there to give me a break. I have never been away from my kids for more than one night, and after finals in school, it would be nice to have some alone time and to get ready for Christmas while they are gone.

Well now my DH and my kids will probably need me for support because who knows how things are going to be in the next 2 months.

Then my DH job is on shaky ground, the company he is working for is under a major law suit that could make the company go banckrupt because of it. Things don't look good but nothing official is being said. He has been with them for over 22 years. Soooo my DH will be interviewing for job in Nashville when he goes to the music show in Austin.
I don't want to move, things are just going great for me now. And you all know the trouble I am having with my marriage anyways.

Then the little stuff, my 10 yr. old son is acting out lately having temper tantrums. I have a major psych paper due Tues., and a jazz band concert with a solo on Wed. I am going freakin nuts right now, I don't know what I am doing.
I see my T this Tuesday, and I am sure he will love hearing all of this especially when he thought he was getting rid of me at the end of the year.
I guess I am still in shock about all of this. I am going to work out this morning and try to work on my paper. I still need to find an outfit for my concert too. Plus I have rehearsals on Mon, Tues, too. What the hell happened to my life? I didn't think it could get much worse, but I was wrong.
How do you support a DH who is under a lot of stress of his job and now his parents, how do you support him when you can't even stand him right now because he has cheated on you?///////

 

Re: It the world ending? My life is goin' to hell SatinDoll

Posted by canadagirl on October 29, 2006, at 9:01:32

In reply to It the world ending? My life is goin' to hell, posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 4:38:07

Just do the best you can SatinDoll, that's all we can ask of ourselves. You don't need to put more pressure on yourself. Make sure you take time for "you" too, in the midst of your busy schedule and everything that's going on.

 

I'm sorry SatinDoll

Posted by Dinah on October 29, 2006, at 14:27:44

In reply to It the world ending? My life is goin' to hell, posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 4:38:07

It'll be a rough time, but you will get through it.

And if you are planning to stay married, this might be a time when his defenses are down, and there is a chance for rebuilding something together.

Is your son close to his grandparents? I'm sure he's at least aware of the tenseness in the house with worry about moving and his dad's job. They're like little barometers of the mood in the house. Give him lots of love, and if counseling is available to him, you might want to take advantage of it. It helped my son to have someone to talk to that he didn't have to worry about, when our parents were dying.

I am sorry. It's such a difficult time in the lives of grown children, even when the relationship with the older generation is ambivilant.

 

Trying so hard not to drown. :-(

Posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 21:37:27

In reply to Re: It the world ending? My life is goin' to hell SatinDoll, posted by canadagirl on October 29, 2006, at 9:01:32

I did get my paper written for school. It is n't the best I could have done, maybe a B, but not an A paper.
Then life turns to pure hell. My T says I haven't experienced like one big episode of terror like the Sept 11, but I have had several repeated momement of terror that equally effects me. But they won't stop.
Now my DH had really turned on me. He is so angry I was just stunned today when he blamed me for making his mother move away two years ago. He said if I tried to get along better with her (in other worlds let her run my life) that she would still be in town. Now she might be dying and he is blaming me because he hasn't seen her in two years.
He yelled at me for the state of mess our house is in. That instead of going to a hallween party at the heath club, I should of stayed home and cleaned. All I do anymore, is take care of myself. Well what the hell has he done in the last couple of years to help me? He was with his whore instead, so I had to learn to take care of myself.
Then he said why hasn't that sh*tty T of mine helped me get over what happened to me as a child. Why am I still afraid of my mom he says?
He just shot me down this weekend, I am so numb I don't know what to say or do. I have never seen him be so cruel ever. I know he is stressed, but I have never had that aimed at me. I just feel so awful, I know he is overreacting, but it still hurts. When will the sh*t stop pouring on my head? I am trying so hard to stay afloat for me and the kids, but I feel like everything is trying to weigh me down.
I am so tired of fighting everyone just to be happy. Why is it so damn hard to live?

 

Re: Trying so hard not to drown. :-(

Posted by sunnydays on October 29, 2006, at 21:51:31

In reply to Trying so hard not to drown. :-(, posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 21:37:27

((((((((((((((((SatinDoll))))))))))))))

I feel so much pain in your words. Please try to hang in there. It doesn't matter what your husband says, you know what your life is like and what is realistic. And it takes time to get over things.

You'll be alright. Hang in there.

sunnydays

 

Re: Trying so hard not to drown. :-( SatinDoll

Posted by madeline on October 30, 2006, at 6:10:02

In reply to Trying so hard not to drown. :-(, posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 21:37:27

Wow! I'm afraid I really can't say what I really think about what your DH said and did for fear of being blocked permanently from babble. What a jerky thing for him to do (how's THAT for euphenism?).

I know that you can keep your head through all this satin, even though every one around you appears to be losing theirs.

You are one strong cookie.

I think that you are right that your DH is just acting out. He probably feels guilty for chosing not see his mom for two years (and YES that was his CHOICE). Rather than accepting responsibilty for his actions, he's blaming you.

My dad is the master of that and it can hurt so bad, but try and realize it says more about him than you.

Try to stay away from his as best you can while this blows over.

Love ya baby!

maddie

 

Re: Trying so hard not to drown. :-( SatinDoll

Posted by TherapyGirl on October 30, 2006, at 7:08:26

In reply to Trying so hard not to drown. :-(, posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 21:37:27

I'm so sorry. I know you can get through this and I hope your DH calms his butt down soon. Perhaps *he* should see a T so he doesn't abuse his family when things aren't going well...

((((((((((SD))))))))))

P.S. When do you see T again? Can you call him if you need to?

 

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SD))))))))))))

Posted by muffled on October 30, 2006, at 11:59:07

In reply to It the world ending? My life is goin' to hell, posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 4:38:07

Sorry its hard :-(
People written good stuff.
Your great SD.
Don't let the world get you.
Just IMO your hubby is being a total dink.
Take care,
Muffled


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