Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 510528

Shown: posts 3 to 27 of 27. Go back in thread:

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by fallsfall on June 10, 2005, at 12:13:14

In reply to Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 11:18:37

I understand completely.

Yes, I think you are correct that you need to be completely honest and open with your therapist. Not telling your therapist doesn't make your feelings go away - it just keeps them secret. So telling your therapist doesn't make them more "real" - they already *are* real. Telling your therapist just gives him the chance to look at what is real with you - so you don't have to look at it by yourself. He can help you get some perspective on things.

I understand your terror regarding your marriage. But I do believe that the solution is not for you to shoulder all of the pain yourself. The solution is to see if your husband and your marriage and you can all grow together. The answer may be yes (I hope so!), but the answer may be no. For me, the answer was no. But at least I know that I did everything I could to be sure that I wasn't choosing the answer for my husband - I was giving him the opportunity to decide if we would grow together, or grow apart.

My best wishes to you.

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T

Posted by B2chica on June 10, 2005, at 12:27:12

In reply to Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 11:18:37

i can't add much more to what has been said but i understand very well.
there are times where i too think i may be 'outgrowing' my husband. i think sometimes that had i received therapy for my needs sooner than i may not have married him. i have changed a lot in his eyes over the last 1 1/2 years, but really i'm just finally showing him who i really am.
i've come to realize that i want to try to stay with him, if he can accept who i am it will work. He is often afraid of my independance also, he is very insecure and often asks me if i'm going to leave him. it's difficult to be the 'strength' of the marriage when you're falling apart inside isn't it.
in order for your marriage to be a healthy one, YOU need to be healthy. take care of yourself, share your needs/wants with both your T and hubby. Say your fears outloud.

You DO need to be open to your T. be blunt (they can't repeat it and can't tell your hubby).

take care
b2c.

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 12:33:28

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by daisym on June 10, 2005, at 12:09:53

> I find myself wanting to ask how old you are...you don't have to tell me but you sound like me in a lot of ways. (I'm in my early 40s) I've been married 22 years and I struggle with my marriage not being what I long for but feeling obligated to stay in it for a number of reasons.

I am 36 and married for 12 years this Sept. I also feel obligated in many ways. He is an awesome guy in a lot of ways, he wouldn't have trouble finding another women if we were no longer together. He cares and is sensitive and a wonderful father and a good husband.
>
> My therapist and several close friends have tried to help me see that I can change within the marriage, find more fulfillment without having to make a drastic change. I think my husband won't stand for that, they tell me he will fight against change but gradually he will come around to this new way of relating and thinking. Or, he won't but I will be able to do what is best for me, not him and we will all survive it.
>
I wonder about this, will the marraige really survive change? But I feel I need to change for myself and make my life more enjoyable. I guess if my marriage can't allow for that, then what kind of marraige do I have anyways?

> I felt horrible talking about such private things and for complaining to my therapist about my husband. He tells me two things: 1) this is MY therapy and completely private so if not here, then where? and 2) He can't help me if I don't tell him how I'm feeling. He doesn't judge, he offers different perspectives. I think your therapist is saying the same thing. You aren't asking permission to get a divorce, nor are you wanting to do marriage counseling without your husband being present. But you are trying to find out who you really are, in all the roles you are being asked to play and what really makes you happy.
>
> .
>
> You asked if anyone gets what you are saying. I think I do. I hope I've helped you not feel so alone. Try not to make yourself crazy before next Wed. I think this is one of the things that compells people to seek out therapy. We all need to know who we "really" are and what we really want. It is OK to want to figure this out. It is probably essential.

I guess one of my fears is what if there isn't anyone better for me? Wouldn't I be ruining me and my childrens lives for a hope for someone better? I guess it would be better to try to change within the marriage and hope I am still accepted and he still wants the new me.
I tried to talk about this before, and I am sure what happened, but my T was really stuggling with this isssue. I could see physically he was really stuggling with what to say to me about it. I do challange him, but he was trying so hard to come up with something to say to my comments. I guess I should ask him about it. It just feels like there are not enough minutes in a therapy hours to get everything out. lol
Thank you so much, Daisy, I am glad I am not alone in feeling what I do. :)

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 12:42:45

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by B2chica on June 10, 2005, at 12:27:12

>
> there are times where i too think i may be 'outgrowing' my husband. i think sometimes that had i received therapy for my needs sooner than i may not have married him.

Wow B2, this is what I told my T a month ago. I think he didn't like what I was saying because right now, my marriage is the only thing secure that I have to hold on to.

He is often afraid of my independance also, he is very insecure and often asks me if i'm going to leave him. it's difficult to be the 'strength' of the marriage when you're falling apart inside isn't it.

This is exactly how I feel. It is so hard to be the strength when I NEED him to be there for me during my difficult time in therapy. It isn't like he isn't there for me, but more like I am afraid to unload all the stuff when I know he is going through his own stuff right now. But when do I get to be the weaker one? I need to be the one leaning.

>
Thank you B2, you have really given me the courage to talk to my T next week about this. This feels like such a turning point, I hope I don't get scared and run away from my T.

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » fallsfall

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 12:46:20

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by fallsfall on June 10, 2005, at 12:13:14

Thanks Shortelise, you are so right, I need to expost my feelings to my T , if I want to really heal. What was the defining moment in your marriage that you knew that you couldn't be together? You don't have to say, I am just curious how you know?

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by Jazzed on June 10, 2005, at 13:30:53

In reply to Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 11:18:37


Hi Happyflower,

I can't add any more wisdom than what's been said here, but I agree with everyone. You really need to tell your T what you're going through, but you should probably tell him why you are afraid to tell him - because he seemed uncomfortable with it before. For a T, it would seem this type of issue would come up over and over again. I think that's why so many of us completely understand where you're coming from, and can empathize with you.

I"m also married to a great guy, and I also love him very much, but every so often I get bored and/or depressed with my life, and think there must be more to life, or sometimes I feel like I want to be rescued. (I have a very good life, just stressful as I perceive it) I also get unhappy with myself, and think I should have accomplished more in my life by now. I have grown and changed a lot in our marriage, and I think it is possible to do that, but I guess it depends on the husband. Mine is really laid back, and I'm not sure if he even notices what I'm going through, I sure wouldn't tell him. The husbands don't have much of a choice though, they can either love us and accept the changes, or not, but you have to be able to breathe and grow in your life, or what's the purpose?

Anyway, I"m telling you all of this to let you know, you're not alone. Some of us seem to be about the same age, maybe our stage of life has something to do with it. I don't know. Maybe part of it is that you HAVE known your husband for 15 years, and he still doesn't know what you're feeling. If it's all about him, that's not fair, and he needs to grow up and get a grip. I've been married for a bit longer than you, and when I'm hurt or upset, I want my husband to instinctively know it, and fix what's wrong, or at least comfort me. Does that ring true, or am I way off base?

You say you will have to reveal things to your T that you don't think you "should". Well, we I guess we should reveal everything to them that's bothering us. That's the only way to get their help. Easier said than done, but once it's out, that alone will probably help somewhat. I know I haven't offered anything more or anything new, but I agree, maybe your putting it in writing is the best way to do it. It might be easier to reveal the real hurt you are feeling.

I think you are one of the nicest people on these boards, and I hope you start feeling better and more supported. I really care, and wish I had some pearl of wisdom for you.
((((((hugs))))))
Julie

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » Jazzed

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 13:46:13

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by Jazzed on June 10, 2005, at 13:30:53

Jazzy, Jazzed, Julie?, lol You told us your name! My best friend was named Julie! I have always felt supported by you, you have been great to me.
My husband is very supportive of almost everything. I guess I don't feel that I can tell him that he is now boring to me now, or that I have outgrown him, or whatever when it comes to "HIM". I don't want to hurt him. But I guess it would be safer to talk to my T about these feelings and maybe he could offer some insite to all this. It feels like I am going through a mid life crisis.

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by pinkeye on June 10, 2005, at 14:36:05

In reply to Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 11:18:37

I am going to reply in detail later, (now I am little very busy), but the thing is real growth and evolution doesn't threaten anybody. It is only when we falsely assume arrogance and pride in the name of growth and independance, that we get on other people's nerves.

It is something I learnt after a long time. Women are nowadays holding lots of different highly charged careers - from pilots to being in the army to business, and corporate Vice Presidents, to Big Business woman to Ministers to everything. And they all keep their husbands.

Men don't fear women's independance and capacity and ability. They only fear arrogance, and being proud and superiority complex. As long as you avoid that and are conscious that whatever you do, you are ultimately a human being first - you will not have any problem. And that way I think of it is, All of us are servants of God - in different capacities. Some people are endowed with more power, and some people less. But with higher power comes higher responsibility - not frivoulousness or arrogance. The higher you go, the humbler you become. I think as long as you adopt that attitude, you can become the president of the US and your husband won't have a problem.

 

Bare bones » happyflower

Posted by Shortelise on June 10, 2005, at 14:47:50

In reply to Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 11:18:37

Yes, yes, I know this so well.

I can only tell you how things went for me.

In my 30's, I looked at my life and thought, ah, well is this it? I'll be with this same man forever, this will go on as it has, just more of the same? I had a few delicious, passionate affairs, jeopardized my marriage, then looked around and realized that I do love my husband, and he loves me. No more affairs.

I began to encourage my husband to do the things he loves, even when it meant he'd be away fishing for a weekend, or out every Tuesday night and the most part of Saturday afternoon. I stopped trying to live his life, and let him live it himself, without nagging, without feeling left out. I then found myself doing the things I love, seeing movies he'd never want to see, going places he wouldn't want to go.
Then we had more to talk about, and together we discovered a new dimension to our marriage. It's a partnership more than anything else. We are not threatened by each other's interests, not threatened by the time we spend apart because we love each other and each wants the other to pursue what makes life good one for each of us.

It was before I went in to therapy that we figured this out, and I can't say how we did it. I guess we both recognized in each other that we would never be happy living in one another's pockets. Understand that I feel I could not live without him, would not want to. My attachemnt to my husband is so deep it defies words. But it didn't start out that way. It was because of our doubts, because of how we changed, that our marriage had to change.

Happyflower, none of that may be of any help to you, but if nothing else, you can see that you are certainly not alone in wondering if you made the right choice, if you want to live the life you're living. I was lucky in that when I began to ask myself those questions, I found it possible for my marriage to evolve as I was evolving, for it to change with me, for me to change with it, for us to change together. Our lives are richer for it. It wasn't always easy, but nothing is easy, ever, except maybe falling down!

ShortE

 

Why don't you teach your husband what you learn? » pinkeye

Posted by pinkeye on June 10, 2005, at 14:47:59

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by pinkeye on June 10, 2005, at 14:36:05

Actually, why don't you just try to take your husband along with you instead of progressing independantly? That way would save your marriage also. Try to share whatever you learn with him, and try to help him develop also - so that he would also become a better personality? My marriage is not one of the greatest, but whatever I learn, I try to share it with my hsuband to whatever extent possibly in a non-offending, non-superior way. And I can see he has also really grown in the past 4 years, and he has helped me also with many religious insights and way of looking at life which I didn't know.. (we have loads and loads of issues in our marriage, but atleast we work on it this way, and with the amount of issues that we have, I think the reason that we stuck with each other is this basic non - egoistic attitude).

> I am going to reply in detail later, (now I am little very busy), but the thing is real growth and evolution doesn't threaten anybody. It is only when we falsely assume arrogance and pride in the name of growth and independance, that we get on other people's nerves.
>
> It is something I learnt after a long time. Women are nowadays holding lots of different highly charged careers - from pilots to being in the army to business, and corporate Vice Presidents, to Big Business woman to Ministers to everything. And they all keep their husbands.
>
> Men don't fear women's independance and capacity and ability. They only fear arrogance, and being proud and superiority complex. As long as you avoid that and are conscious that whatever you do, you are ultimately a human being first - you will not have any problem. And that way I think of it is, All of us are servants of God - in different capacities. Some people are endowed with more power, and some people less. But with higher power comes higher responsibility - not frivoulousness or arrogance. The higher you go, the humbler you become. I think as long as you adopt that attitude, you can become the president of the US and your husband won't have a problem.

 

Real capacity doesn't come with arrogance » pinkeye

Posted by pinkeye on June 10, 2005, at 15:03:11

In reply to Why don't you teach your husband what you learn? » pinkeye, posted by pinkeye on June 10, 2005, at 14:47:59

One more thing you might be aware of is, if you look around, both men and women, people who are really really intelligent and smart and extremely capable and independant - they are not arrogant. They don't think less of anybody - their husbands, coworkers, for that matter, they don't think anybody in the world as beign less than them.

That is what you need to aim for yourself. Try to find people like that and keep them as your role modesl. It is only when we grow halfway, that we think of ourselves as superior, more capable, etc etc. If you really achieve full growth, it would be extremely pleasant for anybody to live with you and for you to live with anyone (doesn't matter how grown they are that much), and you said your husband is basically a good guy - so I am 100 % positie, the right thing to do is to aim for the real growth for yourself and take him with you instead of adopting this half way growth attitude.

Sorry if it ended up being a serious of lecturing.. that was not my intention. I am pressed for time right now and I am just writing whatever comes to my mind without bothering to put it across nicely.

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by Jazzed on June 10, 2005, at 15:34:21

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » Jazzed, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 13:46:13

oops! Crap! LOL Well, that's me for ya! scatterbrained!

I feel exactly like you do, I sure would NEVER want to hurt my husband. He's stuck by me through thick and thin, always trying to understand me, always trying to please me, and I agree, I would never tell my husband he's boring to me! Actually, in my case, I'm not so sure if he's really boring OR if it's the stage of life where we are right now. Working, raising kids, not feeling like there's a lot of disposable income, bills, getting older, not feeling like I"ve accomplished much of anything. In my case, I'd guess it's more likely that I'm the boring one, and I want some excitment, I want to feel more fulfilled. We have a spicy sex life, we love each other, we have good kids, a nice home, so I'm not sure why I feel the way I do. Not very rational I suppose.

I hope you get comfortable with talking to your T about it. I think it's got to be such a natural part of marriage for a lot of people.

JAZZY!!!! How do we change our "handle"?

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by fallsfall on June 10, 2005, at 16:49:55

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » fallsfall, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 12:46:20

I was disabled with depression, but what he was doing wasn't helping me - it was making things harder. For instance, my whole goal for the day was to do the dishes after dinner. We finished dinner and I went to the bathroom. When I came out he had done the dishes (he was doing me a "favor"). But he had taken away my chance to meet my goal.

We went to a marriage counselor. He asked us to remember what we enjoyed doing together the most in the beginning of our marriage (19 years before). We had enjoyed constructing things for the turtles we kept (i.e. rafts, filtration etc.). He asked us to do a project like that. So we decided to build a wheel for my hedgehog. We started working on it, but it was more like each of us was doing something separately. Then there was a part that he said that he would do, but he never got around to doing it. If this exercise in therapy wasn't important enough for him to put any effort into it, then I wasn't important to him.

The bottom line was that I had to make changes, but he was not willing to allow me to make the changes I needed to survive, because he was not willing to make any changes himself. He thought that if he just waited long enough that I would go back to the way things were. But that wasn't an option for me.

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 17:03:43

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by fallsfall on June 10, 2005, at 16:49:55


>
> We went to a marriage counselor. He asked us to remember what we enjoyed doing together the most in the beginning of our marriage (19 years before). We had enjoyed constructing things for the turtles we kept (i.e. rafts, filtration etc.). He asked us to do a project like that. So we decided to build a wheel for my hedgehog. We started working on it, but it was more like each of us was doing something separately. Then there was a part that he said that he would do, but he never got around to doing it. If this exercise in therapy wasn't important enough for him to put any effort into it, then I wasn't important to him.
>
> What a great T! I think you tell a lot about the elements of a marraige if you see how they work togethter and build something. Last summer my husband and I built our own koi pond. Waterfall, 3000 gallon pond. Well I am sure the neighboors thought we were getting a divorse by all the yelling and frustration they heard. By the way, if any of you are want a pond, LET SOMEONE ELSE BUILD AND DIG IT! Don't try to save money and do it yourself! lol Well the good news to the story is that all the koi lived, the lilley pads are all coming up through the water, and the fish and frogs are all happy producing babies. The end. lol

 

above post is for fallfall (nm)

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 17:05:12

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 17:03:43

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » Jazzed

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 17:14:00

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by Jazzed on June 10, 2005, at 15:34:21

Jazzy,,you are not scatterbrained! lol You know I like what you said about marriage, I have the same kind of marraige. That's why I don't want to hurt my husband if I don't need to. It is nice to know that I am not the only one who thinks about wanting more. I guess the secret is learning to get more and still stay married. I guess this is why I need therapy. There I said it, I NEED THERAPY!!!! AUUUGGHHHHH! Boy I hope my T is on his toes next Wed. because I am going knock his socks off! lol Maybe I should warn him to get a good nights sleep the night before! lol Thank you Jazzy Julie!

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by Jazzed on June 10, 2005, at 18:01:08

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » Jazzed, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 17:14:00

I sure hope I can find a good T like you and daisy have Happyflower. The one I saw last week kinda scared me off, he was SO bad! But I'm sure there's someone out there I can work with. I know I need therapy too, for some of the same reasons. I know if I want more, I have to get it for myself, but it's SOOOO hard! LOL

Keep us posted on what happens next Wed.!
Jazzy

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » Jazzed

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 18:16:07

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by Jazzed on June 10, 2005, at 18:01:08

I am sorry that my head has been in my butt this week, that I didn't respond to your thread about your appointment. But I know you will find someone much better, there are a tons of T's out there! I guess I just got lucky, I got my refereal from doctors office. ( which I think I got it from a nurse that might have seen him or know about him somehow, because when I mentioned to my doctor how great he was, he wrote down his name, lol) I believe I do have a great T, even if he pissed me off this week, not his fault, just my transference and disapointment of not being his real friend. But you know I believe that sometimes real healing comes after really bad feelings come up.

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » pinkeye

Posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 18:38:46

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by pinkeye on June 10, 2005, at 14:36:05

You are right pinkeye, I haven't responded to your posts, I think I am still trying to figure them out, and think about them a little bit more. I find you interesting and very smart!

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by Tamar on June 11, 2005, at 18:00:31

In reply to Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 11:18:37

I can’t add much to what other people have said, except that everything you said in your first post resonated with me. I’ve felt a bit bored in my marriage for quite a while. And I feel really guilty about it. And I didn’t want to b*tch about my husband to my T (or anyone else).

But I did find that therapy helped me to take some risks: it helped my to find ways of allowing myself to become a bit more vulnerable with my husband and talk to him about some of what I was feeling. I really hate feeling vulnerable, but as it turned out my husband rose to the challenge. Things are improving for us. I still don’t feel things are perfect, but at least we’re able to communicate better.

I like your idea of advising your T to get a good night’s sleep! And I really hope your session goes well.

Tamar

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » Tamar

Posted by happyflower on June 11, 2005, at 18:09:32

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by Tamar on June 11, 2005, at 18:00:31

> I can’t add much to what other people have said, except that everything you said in your first post resonated with me. I’ve felt a bit bored in my marriage for quite a while. And I feel really guilty about it. And I didn’t want to b*tch about my husband to my T (or anyone else).
>
I tried to talk to my husband this weekend about "us" and he gets so insecure when I say that I am not being me and I need to do things to make me happy, not just the family.

> I really hate feeling vulnerable, but as it turned out my husband rose to the challenge. Things are improving for us. I still don’t feel things are perfect, but at least we’re able to communicate better.

I think that is great to hear, that he rose to the challenge. That says a lot about how much he cares for you! :)
>
> I like your idea of advising your T to get a good night’s sleep! And I really hope your session goes well.
>
Yeah, I would love to call him, but I MADE myself NOT call him these 2 weeks between session. I need to lose my grip of neediness.
>

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by Jazzed on June 11, 2005, at 20:15:22

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » Jazzed, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 18:16:07

> I am sorry that my head has been in my butt this week, that I didn't respond to your thread about your appointment.

No problem, I know how it feels to have a bad day, week, month..... LOL.

Jazzy

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower

Posted by Aphrodite on June 11, 2005, at 22:01:58

In reply to Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 10, 2005, at 11:18:37

I often feel that talking about others, including my husband, is a type of betrayal. (I always adhered to that "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything" rule.) My T has helped me see the error of that thinking, that the betrayal of hiding it or denying it is really betraying myself. I will not heal or improve anything if I can't admit and talk about the problem.

Whatever honesty brings to your life, it will be for the better. And I truly hope that it is that you will be able to be your authentic self and that your husband will grow to love and accept that. I'm sorry that he feels so insecure. My husband has the opposite problem -- a bit too much self-confidence! I told him once that I've discussed our marital problems with my T, and he said, "Better him than me!" You can obviously see one of my problems there;)

It's good that you've written your feelings. It can help you organize and practice before you go. Perhaps that will help you be less apprehensive.

Good luck to you! Let us know how it turns out. (Now you have to tell your T because all of us will be waiting to hear!)

 

Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T

Posted by happyflower on June 11, 2005, at 22:35:13

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T » happyflower, posted by Aphrodite on June 11, 2005, at 22:01:58

> I often feel that talking about others, including my husband, is a type of betrayal. (I always adhered to that "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything" rule.)

I feel this way too, it is like I should be thankful for what I got and not complain about my husband. I do feel sort of guilty about it.

My T has helped me see the error of that thinking, that the betrayal of hiding it or denying it is really betraying myself. I will not heal or improve anything if I can't admit and talk about the problem.
>
I like this thought, I guess I have a lot more to think about. It sounds like you have a great T.

> Whatever honesty brings to your life, it will be for the better. And I truly hope that it is that you will be able to be your authentic self and that your husband will grow to love and accept that.

This must have been one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. Thank you so much! :)
>
> It's good that you've written your feelings. It can help you organize and practice before you go. Perhaps that will help you be less apprehensive.
>
> Good luck to you! Let us know how it turns out. (Now you have to tell your T because all of us will be waiting to hear!)

Yikes, now I have performance anxiety! lol

 

message above for Aphrodite (nm)

Posted by happyflower on June 11, 2005, at 22:38:37

In reply to Re: Scared, ready to expose my skeltons to T, posted by happyflower on June 11, 2005, at 22:35:13


This is the end of the thread.


Show another thread

URL of post in thread:


Psycho-Babble Psychology | Extras | FAQ


[dr. bob] Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD, bob@dr-bob.org

Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.