Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 439682

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Re: Relationships

Posted by Gabbix2 on January 21, 2005, at 19:29:31

In reply to Re: Relationships » gardenergirl, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 19:09:38

In my experience, as long as their are two people involved in the relationship it's doomed to failure. And ya, what the hey is a Bobo doll? : )

 

Re: Relationships/ pinkeye » pinkeye

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 19:49:53

In reply to Re: Relationships » Fallen4MyT, posted by pinkeye on January 21, 2005, at 19:28:00

You and I must have posted at the same time lol....I just wanted to thank you for your post..I said I was done on this subject but as your post hit BEFORE mine..I wanted to thank you for the support and add that I agree on the laws and rules :)
HUGS

> My opinion is this - you are both adults and while there are rules that are not meant to be broken - it doesn't mean that they are sancrosanct and need to be followed to the letter.
> Beyond that, a rule needs to be respected and thought about and given the maximum weightage and evaluation - if after all that you still feel it is a good match, then you probably don't have to obey the rule after that. You guys wait for 2 years and then if you still feel the same, you get married so you don't jeopardize his license.
> Rules are manmade - and it is only a guiding principle - if tomorrow the APA comes up with something else, then what? So maybe we should just treat it as a good guideline and let it go at that.
>

 

LOL GG WE DEMAND TO KNOW

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 19:52:06

In reply to Re: Relationships, posted by Gabbix2 on January 21, 2005, at 19:29:31

What is a Bobo doll????

 

LOL

Posted by rainbowbrite on January 21, 2005, at 19:57:25

In reply to LOL GG WE DEMAND TO KNOW, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 19:52:06

ROFLAO It is this doll that was involved in experiments with kids where they exposed kids to an adult beating up a bobo doll (i think it looks like a blow up doll), then left the kids alone to see if they would imitate and hit bobo. they did.

 

Bobo doll pic

Posted by TofuEmmy on January 21, 2005, at 20:01:58

In reply to LOL GG WE DEMAND TO KNOW, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 19:52:06

http://academic.evergreen.edu/h/hiljus01/bobo.htm

 

Re: LOL » rainbowbrite

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 20:31:23

In reply to LOL, posted by rainbowbrite on January 21, 2005, at 19:57:25

Wow color me duh hahaha but I never heard of them..I remember my dog had a toy way back...you squeezed it and its eyes , tongue and ears popped out...i don't want that lol hahahaha ouch nooooo

> ROFLAO It is this doll that was involved in experiments with kids where they exposed kids to an adult beating up a bobo doll (i think it looks like a blow up doll), then left the kids alone to see if they would imitate and hit bobo. they did.

 

Re: Bobo doll pic » TofuEmmy

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 20:33:15

In reply to Bobo doll pic, posted by TofuEmmy on January 21, 2005, at 20:01:58

> http://academic.evergreen.edu/h/hiljus01/bobo.htm

Wow Emmy thank you I looked at the site looks like they have been around a long time..I never heard of them...ever....

 

Re: LOL » Fallen4MyT

Posted by rainbowbrite on January 21, 2005, at 20:37:23

In reply to Re: LOL » rainbowbrite, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 20:31:23

I think they were only used for the experiemtn. i only heard of them from psych classes

 

Re: LOL

Posted by gardenergirl on January 21, 2005, at 21:04:21

In reply to Re: LOL » Fallen4MyT, posted by rainbowbrite on January 21, 2005, at 20:37:23

Sorry, I was on my way home and just got back online. And yeah, the Bobo doll experiment was old. I do think it was an actual toy back then, but nowadays, well, blow up toys seem to serve different purposes. ;)

And I only know of it from teaching Psych. :)

gg

Thanks emmy and rainbowbrite for stepping in for me! :D

 

Re: Relationships » Fallen4MyT

Posted by alexandra_k on January 21, 2005, at 21:16:09

In reply to Re: Relationships » alexandra_k, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 18:57:09

Ah. See I pipe up without knowing much what I am talking about :-(

I think gg's post was great too. And I agree. I have no bad feelings towards you at all. And clearly I didn't have much of an understanding about the situation.

I guess that your posting name, and the fact that you still do refer to him as your t may be what evokes such strong reactions from others about this, though.

I think you could probably prevent that by giving him another initial, not posting about him (in the context of being your therapist) on the psych board, and changing your posting name.

But that is just my 2c.

(((((Fallen)))))
Like I say, I respect ya.
I shall shut up about this now.

 

I had one. They were way cool. » gardenergirl

Posted by Dinah on January 21, 2005, at 21:45:50

In reply to Re: LOL, posted by gardenergirl on January 21, 2005, at 21:04:21

I tried to find one as an adult, but oddly enough they were all too short to effectively punch. Go figure.

 

Re: I had one. ME TOO!! :)) » Dinah

Posted by just plain jane on January 21, 2005, at 23:48:41

In reply to I had one. They were way cool. » gardenergirl, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2005, at 21:45:50

It was indeed a real toy, marketed for exactly the purpose of being a punching bag, and that's what I did with him. I punched him so hard that I popped him more than once. He had (electrical??) tape all over him before my mom finally made me give him up. I should say, before my mom threw him out while I was at school, 'cause that's how I "gave him up". And I saw him in the trash can when I took some out that day. Man, my mom was MEAN!!! :\

just plain bad girl jane
(facetiousness, I no longer believe her)

 

lol thanks all on the bobo stories an info :-P (nm)

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 23:57:41

In reply to Re: I had one. ME TOO!! :)) » Dinah, posted by just plain jane on January 21, 2005, at 23:48:41

 

Re: APPROVAL » Fallen4MyT

Posted by Pfinstegg on January 22, 2005, at 0:38:11

In reply to APPROVAL, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 21, 2005, at 19:28:01

Fallen, I just want to make sure that you know that I am not critical of you in any way. I never have been, and never would be. I am truly happy that you've found someone to love, and who loves you. You know I do think that it would have been better for him to follow professional ethical guidelines- waiting two years for a relationship- not starting a relationship immediately and waiting two years for marriage.(those are not the guidelines). The two-year waiting period is there for such a good reason- to make sure that these feelings are not mostly transference and countertransference (that would lead eventually to complete disillusion on both sides), and to eliminate the power differential which exists in therapy where one person reveals everything and the other very little (it will take time for you to become a fully equal partner to him- to know him as well as he knows you).

I do hope things go well for the two of you, and that you find real and lasting happiness together. As you know, there are several people posting here who have been extremely hurt, and even damaged, by similiar situations; when they express concern and worry, they are speaking from personal experiences of heartbreak, not from malice or ill will. But, there are bound to be exceptions to even the most tried and true rules. I hope that turns out to be what happens for you! I really do wish you well, and although you mention negative e-mails, my impression is that most of the posters, although they may be concerned and uneasy because of how things developed, wish you well also. I certainly do.

 

Re: APPROVAL » Pfinstegg

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 22, 2005, at 1:48:51

In reply to Re: APPROVAL » Fallen4MyT, posted by Pfinstegg on January 22, 2005, at 0:38:11

OOPS my bad, I thought I had posted with the below post that it was my final post on ME in this thread as I feel this is all just REDUNDANT but I guess I failed to add that sentence, leaving pinkeye wondering why I started my post with ..to quote me
"You and I must have posted at the same time lol....I just wanted to thank you for your post..I said I was done on this subject but as your post hit BEFORE mine.".

Oh thank you PF on the well wishes :)

It is really not that I want anyone's approval I do not need it...I respect other's opinions as well as belief's and had this thread stayed on the subject and had that someone not accidently kind of pointed MY bracelet THREAD out on Social thus fingering ME out.(and THAT someone was gracious about this later so I have NO issue with her please do not stir that up) then *I* became the topic. I would not have posted but one post in here...But the subject went from what pushes your buttons to me. ....If 7000 posters and just said I am with the APA those T crossings push my button it is bad, illegal and so on I would have never had much to say in here. Ask yourself if you posted on social..I haven't cleaned my house in 17 years and on this ORIGINAL thread someone said...yes messy houses push my buttons and another said...you know of a messy house...and the reply was yes someone posted to that on social...then you got a lot of babblemail and emails saying basically...WOW WHY ARE THEY GOING AFTER YOU...would it make you feel put down...dirty house or not? I do not expect replies ...just think on it.

 

Re: please be supportive » alexandra_k

Posted by Dr. Bob on January 22, 2005, at 2:09:53

In reply to Re: A COMMENT TO ALL PLS? » Fallen4MyT, posted by alexandra_k on January 21, 2005, at 17:10:47

> I do think it was wrong of him
>
> I would think that if you really love him you would not let him risk his career for you like that... I would think that if he really loved you he would want you to be able to take some time on this and really be sure... It is very suspicious to me that there is such urgency and hurry.
>
> I really cannot condone what you guys are doing.

Sorry, but I think Fallen has a point. Please respect the views of others and be sensitive to their feelings.

If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil

Follow-ups regarding these issues should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration.

Thanks,

Bob

 

OOPs

Posted by rainbowbrite on January 22, 2005, at 8:48:20

In reply to Re: LOL » Fallen4MyT, posted by rainbowbrite on January 21, 2005, at 20:37:23

I thought they were made only for the experiment....did the eexperiemtn ruin them??

 

Sorry Fallen » Dr. Bob

Posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2005, at 16:47:58

In reply to Re: please be supportive » alexandra_k, posted by Dr. Bob on January 22, 2005, at 2:09:53

I guess I did come into this whole conversation a little late.

I am sorry that I went on and on. I agree, I should have had one shot then left it.

I hope I didn't offend you.
Well, I figure I probably did, but I hope I didn't offend you too much.

 

Sorry Fallen/ don't worry about it alexandra (nm)

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 22, 2005, at 17:11:04

In reply to Sorry Fallen » Dr. Bob, posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2005, at 16:47:58

 

Re: Fallen

Posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2005, at 17:34:05

In reply to Sorry Fallen/ don't worry about it alexandra (nm), posted by Fallen4MyT on January 22, 2005, at 17:11:04

Oh, I am allowed to worry a bit :-)

Really, I try to take something / learn something from situations such as this.

Will you still be silly with me over on social?

 

Re: Fallen » alexandra_k

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 22, 2005, at 18:06:10

In reply to Re: Fallen, posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2005, at 17:34:05

> Oh, I am allowed to worry a bit :-)
>
> Really, I try to take something / learn something from situations such as this.
>
> Will you still be silly with me over on social?

HAHAHA YES I will still be silly and I hope you really really understand the intent and meaning of what and why I posted something I did elsewhere..See me over there cause this will get redirected... :) if ya wanna babblemail me on it cool too...its the stand not the person...HUGS

 

:-) (nm) » Fallen4MyT

Posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2005, at 18:21:54

In reply to Re: Fallen » alexandra_k, posted by Fallen4MyT on January 22, 2005, at 18:06:10

 

:-) (-: (nm) » alexandra_k

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 22, 2005, at 18:41:31

In reply to :-) (nm) » Fallen4MyT, posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2005, at 18:21:54

 

Re: Relationships

Posted by shrinking violet on January 24, 2005, at 10:14:18

In reply to Re: Relationships, posted by gardenergirl on January 21, 2005, at 18:50:51

Fallen,

I just want to say I'm happy you both found each other and I wish you all the best.

sv

 

Re: Relationships » shrinking violet

Posted by Fallen4MyT on January 24, 2005, at 17:48:45

In reply to Re: Relationships, posted by shrinking violet on January 24, 2005, at 10:14:18

Aww thank you :) SV I must admit I am so happy and people like you who share in that makes it even nicer.

HUGS

> Fallen,
>
> I just want to say I'm happy you both found each other and I wish you all the best.
>
> sv


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