Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 445024

Shown: posts 1 to 25 of 33. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by pretty_paints on January 20, 2005, at 23:48:59

Okay boys and girls, hello :)

Two little questions:

1) Has anyone here had psychosis (delusions/hallucinations/voices) which was due to psychotic depression? What type of themes did these symptoms have? Were they mood congruent?

And

2) I find it interesting looking at psychotic themes. It's funny how the same things tend to come up again and again. Obviously everyone is different, and has different experiences, but if you think about all the possible "crazy", out of control senarios possible, it's actually amazing how similar some people's symptoms are. For example, you could think of loads of weird things!! But the same themes always seem to repeat themselves. People believing they're someone important, radio waves, devices planted in their brains, things involving the government/police/FBI, people after them, people wanting to kill them...

How come do you think these themes reoccur?

Thanks a lot for replying, Kate xx

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by linkadge on January 20, 2005, at 23:48:59

In reply to PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by pretty_paints on January 19, 2005, at 17:32:12

I've often thought the same things. This is what I think. The parts of the brain that create psychotic thinking are common in everybody, but seem to be perpetually activated in people with schitsophrenia. THese types of thoughts can be produced in anybody with certain drugs.

I think the beginning of the psychotic thinking begins with either extreme feelings of personal importance or extreme feelings of worthlessness.

I have often thought about psychosis (which often makes me psychotic!).

THis is, (in my mind), the fundamental thinking process in psychosis.

"With power (ability etc.), comes responsability"

First a person must believe that it is in a position of power, importance, or has some ability that nobody else has etc. (in depression this may actually be a distorted coping mechanism - ie to deal with feelings of depression, the brain comes up with increasingly abstract ways to regain self worth)

After this, the being shifts into a position of state preservation. Ie. the paranoia, the central reference, grandiose thinking, are ways that the organism tries to preserve this precieved sence of personal gain.

Take this for example:

Oftentimes seemingly normal people who have recieved large sums of money (lottery etc) have suffer psychiatric and psychotic episodes.

First there is the initial feeling of having gained something that is very important and that other people want. After this many people become extremely paranoid, agitated etc when they figure that other people, government etc is after there money.

Same is true for stimulants. At first they produce feelings of euphoria, power, and increased self worth. To accomidate for the increased feelings of self worth the brain triggers the power = responsability cycle. After this the brain comes up with all sorts of things that it is responsable for. Oftentimes this is remicent of what is learned in religion, or sometimes it is problems they heard on the news. Psychotic thinking begins with a feeling of "universal responsability".

I think that basically psychosis can happen when the mood is extremely incongruent with reality. If extremely depressed without reason, the brain invents imaginary reasons. If euphoric without reason, the brain invents imaginary reasons.

They amygdala is *way overactive* in psychosis. The amygdala deals with feelings of fear and guilt. Being depressed can create feelings of guilt, but too much pleasure likewise can create feelings of guilt.

Just some of my personal thoughts on psychosis.

Have a nice day

Linkadge



 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by banga on January 20, 2005, at 23:48:59

In reply to PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by pretty_paints on January 19, 2005, at 17:32:12

It is fairly interesting....and it can't be specifically a biological thing, people didn't talk about aliens until 70 years ago, and the FBI didn't exist...
I think people with psychoses such as these (and here I must apologise, I am guessing and certainly someone who has experienced this could say more) have a feeling of invasion--they are no longer secure in their own self, others can intrude--their boundaries of body and self are vulnerable. The mode of intrusion is picked from things/events around them--these days aliens, radio waves, etc. There are other types of hallucinations and delusions, but you are right that these in particular hapen for people a lot. You have to look at what feelings are behind these themes and illusions....

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by Sebastian on January 21, 2005, at 12:02:45

In reply to PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by pretty_paints on January 19, 2005, at 17:32:12

I've got all that. Looking for answers, talking to myself. Paranoia, hiding in the house. Going crazy, like just standing there in public, or falling down, when I don't know what else to do. Seeing people who I think are someone else. Yes thinking of a lot of weird things, for months at a time even, takes a while to sort out reality again.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by Mark H. on January 21, 2005, at 17:27:14

In reply to PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by pretty_paints on January 19, 2005, at 17:32:12

Interestingly, the Internet both exposes the similarity in psychotic themes and inadvertently promotes them (see, as one potential source, the Illuminati Conspiracy Archive at http://www.conspiracyarchive.com/).

The themes change somewhat with time: when a friend of mine had a psychotic break about 35 years ago, her concerns were mainly about Nazis, telephone calls from the dead, and someone putting poison in her food. I doubt that younger schizophrenics are as intensely concerned with Hitler and the Third Reich, although poison remains an active theme due (I suspect) to the sense that something external must be causing the terrible sense of being threatened.

Since there is no objective reality (what we think of as reality is actually just consensus, isn't it?), then the reality experienced by psychotics is subjectively as valid as that of "normals." Here again, the Internet provides opportunities for mutual support and reinforcement for beliefs that the majority experience as distorted (see, for instance, the Mind Control Forums at http://www.mindcontrolforums.com/).

What is the source of the homogeneity of psychotic themes? Is it that our minds "break down" in similar ways? Is it that psychotics fail to filter out the ideas at the fringe of our culture? I'm interested in what others think.

Mark H.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by alexandra_k on January 21, 2005, at 17:36:29

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by Mark H. on January 21, 2005, at 17:27:14

I read something in New Scientist about how to create a good conspiricy theory. It was basically about making it so that there wasn't anything that really could count as evidence for or against it. Any evidence that could be taken to disconfirm it is explained away.

Some theorists have said that this sort of 'immunity' to evidence seems to be a feature of many delusions.

Something that is in common between conspiricay theories, delusions, religious / spiritual beliefs.

It is hard to figure the differences between these.

Are they intrinsically different, or just a function of how acceptable the greater society takes them to be.

Themes do recur. But also change on the 'surface'. People may be replaced by 'impostors' 'aliens' 'clones' or, as one theorist put it 'whatever existant technology may suggest'.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by alexandra_k on January 21, 2005, at 17:49:16

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by alexandra_k on January 21, 2005, at 17:36:29

A little list of delusions that I have compiled...

1)Cotard 'I am dead'
2)Capgras 'My wife has been replaced by an impostor'
3)Fregoli 'People I know are disguising themselves as strangers and are following me around'
4)Unilateral Neglect 'Thats not my arm - It's yours!'
5)Reduplicative Paramnesia 'My husband died long ago - but he is also a current patient on this ward'
6)Mirrored Self Mis-Identification 'There is a person in the mirror who follows me around'
7)Thought Insertion 'Someone elses thoughts are being inserted in my mind'
8)Alien Control 'Someone else is initiating my actions'
9)Thought Withdrawal 'Someone is taking thoughts from my mind'
10)Thought Broadcast 'Other people can hear my thoughts'
11)Reference 'The tables signified that the world was coming to an end'
12)Grandeur 'I am god'
13)Persecution / Paranoid 'The FBI are out to get me'
14)Jealousy 'My partner is cheating on me'
15)Erotomania 'Winston Peters is in love with me'
16)Somatic 'I don't have any internal organs'.

These kinds of delusions (with slight individual variation) have been noted again and again. There are other kinds too (such as the delusion that one has been turned into a wild beast).

It might be hard to explain ALL of these different kinds of delusions with the same explanation.

I put an essay I wrote on this topic over on writing if anyone is interested.

Here are the sections (in order).

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/431767.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/431950.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/433134.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/432333.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/432572.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/432573.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/432996.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/433429.html

http://dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/433433.html

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by Mark H. on January 21, 2005, at 19:57:15

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by alexandra_k on January 21, 2005, at 17:49:16

Dear Alexandra,

WOW!

1.) I think you posted this essay a month ago because you knew we would be asking these questions today. (projective grandiosity)

2.) Someone disguised as "Alexandra K" is inserting her thoughts into my head. (grateful acknowledgement)

3.) If the Rt. Hon. Winston Peters has any sense, he should be in love with Alexandra K. (prescriptive erotomania)

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and the links to your wonderful essay. As always, I'm blown away by your thoughtful insights.

With warm regards,

Mark H.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » Mark H.

Posted by alexandra_k on January 21, 2005, at 21:03:44

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by Mark H. on January 21, 2005, at 19:57:15

(((Mark))))

WOW! Yourself :-)

I am glad someone liked it :-)
Please feel free to pull it to pieces :-)
Really, if I can say much much much much more to be clearer or to prevent misunderstanding or whatever than all that just helps me out heaps :-)

 

Question about psychotic symptoms

Posted by Angela2 on January 22, 2005, at 15:38:55

In reply to PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by pretty_paints on January 19, 2005, at 17:32:12

Can a psychotic symptom be that you've thought people were talking about you when they really weren't? I am on an anti-psychotic right now and it is working really well. I have never had alien thoughts or the government / media is after me thoughts either. But definitely the paranoia thoughts. I've been in class rooms and have thought that the discussion that was going on was really about me. It ususally has to do with mental illness or if someone is angry about something. Like one time in my english class they were talking about a depressing poem and I thought they were all referring to me in some way. Ugh. It was really uncomfortable. I've thought that people have left the room because of me. Is this just paranoia? Or is this a delusion of grandeur? Both maybe? Does anyone know? I am partly in denial about having psychotic symptoms and being on an anti-psychotic because I hate the word. But all it really means is that one's mind breaks from reality. I prefer calling my medicine a mood stabilizer. or psychiatric medicine. My question was that are my symtoms psychotic also, because nobody mentioned it here. I think I already know the answer, I mean why else would I be taking this medicine, but could someone tell me anyway?

Sorry for all the rambling. But this is an issue that's close to my heart and something that I'm still trying to cope with and figure out.

-Angela2

 

Re: Question about psychotic symptoms » Angela2

Posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2005, at 16:33:10

In reply to Question about psychotic symptoms, posted by Angela2 on January 22, 2005, at 15:38:55

>I've been in class rooms and have thought that the discussion that was going on was really about me. It ususally has to do with mental illness or if someone is angry about something. Like one time in my english class they were talking about a depressing poem and I thought they were all referring to me in some way. Ugh. It was really uncomfortable. I've thought that people have left the room because of me.

I have an interest in this stuff BUT I AM NOT A PROFESSIONAL. So you would be wise to take this with a grain of salt. If you really want to know you would need to ask your doctor.

IMO that would be delusions of reference. Some people think that a message on the tv or radio has a special significance or meaning for them. That it is a personal message for them in some way. It sounds like sometimes you interpret conversations as being about you in some way when by the sounds of it they weren't really aimed at you.

>I am partly in denial about having psychotic symptoms and being on an anti-psychotic because I hate the word. But all it really means is that one's mind breaks from reality. I prefer calling my medicine a mood stabilizer. or psychiatric medicine.

Yeah. Though I have been on them too. Yeah, ok, so maybe I get a little psychotic at times as well ;-) Anti-psychotics can be prescribed for other reasons though, so it doesn't follow that you must be delusional just because you are on them.

 

Re: Question about psychotic symptoms » Angela2

Posted by fallsfall on January 22, 2005, at 18:09:21

In reply to Question about psychotic symptoms, posted by Angela2 on January 22, 2005, at 15:38:55

Anti-psychotics are prescribed for people who are not psychotic. They have other effects than just reducing psychosis. So, it is not a valid conclusion that because you are taking an anti-psychotic that you must, therefore, be psychotic.

Your description sounds more like paranoia to me than delusions of grandeur, but I'm not a professional. I usually find that when I voice similar concerns with my therapist that I am blowing things out of proportion (i.e. on Friday he said that some behaviors might be annoying, but they weren't pathalogical). If you can ask about these things then at least you would know. Also, just talking about things takes the edge off them lots of times - secrecy makes things more vivid.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* *possible trigger*

Posted by Camille Dumont on January 22, 2005, at 23:29:03

In reply to PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by pretty_paints on January 19, 2005, at 17:32:12

Well, I do have visual illusions / hallucinations and strange pulsions though whether these are psychotic of simply the consequence of an overactive imaginaton coupled with SPD is still up for debate but they do fall into certain categories.

In terms of the visual stuff big recurring themes :

- Bugs, spiders, flies, insects in general ... I see them appear in the air, wallpapers will transform in to masses of twitching spiders etc ... and the funny thing is, I have no problem with bugs in general, aside from really large numbers of ants, anything else I'm ok with and willing to handle

- Dead / mutilated animals. Lots of dead cats, dead dogs, etc. I figure this is because I love animals so much

- People ... mostly as shadows, vanishing as soon as I look at them. I see them on the roof of my house, darting from teh corner of my eyes, etc.

In terms of the Mental shuff there is really only one "theme" : violence. It feels as though I have a morbidly curious freak inside my head suggesting things like : gee, wouldn't it be fun to grab that stranger there and smash his face agains the wall, I wonder what sound it would make. Or gee, I wonder how it would taste like if you'd grab that pigeon there and bit his head off, would the blood gush in your mouth or would it be mostly feather. Sometimes its directed at myself, curious pulsions about destroying / damaging my own body. Fortunately I don't feel as though I have to do what the "voice" suggests ... just annoying sometimes.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* *possible trigger* » Camille Dumont

Posted by Angela2 on January 24, 2005, at 12:16:31

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* *possible trigger*, posted by Camille Dumont on January 22, 2005, at 23:29:03

Camille,

I found your post very interesting and it did not freak me out or disturb me in the least! Have you ever heard of the comic book "Johnny the Homicidal Maniac" by Jonen Vasquez? What you described in your last paragraph reminded me a lot of this comic. It is about a guy named Johnny who does the things you think of. The illustrations are amazing and it is more funny than disturbing.

-Angela2

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » Camille Dumont

Posted by bimini on January 25, 2005, at 9:39:00

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* *possible trigger*, posted by Camille Dumont on January 22, 2005, at 23:29:03

> Well, I do have visual illusions / hallucinations and strange pulsions though whether these are psychotic or simply the consequence of an overactive imaginaton coupled with SPD is still up for debate but they do fall into certain categories.

I have visual illusions/halluzinations without any theme. An object may get "stuck" and carries over elsewhere, I think I see something but I really saw it earlier. Not always, mostly I am not aware where it came from. This changes then to infinite combos and no trigger or pattern I can discern. I can minimize confusion by avoiding rapid head movement and insisting on certain lighting. I don't know if substitutions of objects have any symbolic or symbiotic/semiotic significance.
bimini

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by Dinah on January 25, 2005, at 9:48:00

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » Camille Dumont, posted by bimini on January 25, 2005, at 9:39:00

I hear background chatter as I go to sleep if I've been overstimulated during the day. I can't make out any of the words, but sometimes it gets to be a deafening roar. Like in a restaurant.

That's one reason the neurologist thought I have narcolepsy. For myself, I think it's overworked synapses regurgitating the day's overstimulations.

My therapist also considers me schizotypal because I have beliefs that are not shared by the majority. I sort of resent that being considered pathological.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by Camille Dumont on January 25, 2005, at 13:26:01

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by Dinah on January 25, 2005, at 9:48:00

> I hear background chatter as I go to sleep if I've been overstimulated during the day. I can't make out any of the words, but sometimes it gets to be a deafening roar. Like in a restaurant.
>
> That's one reason the neurologist thought I have narcolepsy. For myself, I think it's overworked synapses regurgitating the day's overstimulations.
>
> My therapist also considers me schizotypal because I have beliefs that are not shared by the majority. I sort of resent that being considered pathological.
>
>

Most of the Axis II "disorders" do seem to be a bit too judgemental in my opinion. I prefer to see them as personality "types" rather than "disorders".

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » Dinah

Posted by B2Chica on January 26, 2005, at 9:19:44

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by Dinah on January 25, 2005, at 9:48:00

i get that chatter too. it's weird. typically that's why i like to keep the tv or radio on (if i'm watching one tv i keep another one on...so it doens't freak me out-. mine only get loud (extrordinaryly loud) during my HG/HP episodes. sometimes i swear it's SO loud i'm going to blow an eardrum!
but i agree with the over stimulation concept very much. interesting that i too have the schizotypal label.
b2c.


> I hear background chatter as I go to sleep if I've been overstimulated during the day. I can't make out any of the words, but sometimes it gets to be a deafening roar. Like in a restaurant.
>
> That's one reason the neurologist thought I have narcolepsy. For myself, I think it's overworked synapses regurgitating the day's overstimulations.
>
> My therapist also considers me schizotypal because I have beliefs that are not shared by the majority. I sort of resent that being considered pathological.
>
>

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* *possible trigger* » Camille Dumont

Posted by B2Chica on January 26, 2005, at 9:31:16

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* *possible trigger*, posted by Camille Dumont on January 22, 2005, at 23:29:03

i've never thought of mine having to do with psychosis...but....
mine are typically very violent and almost ALways toward myself-ex of simple one: if i'm walking down stairs at work i'll flash and see myself falling violently down breaking my neck and legs i feel pressure on those parts of my body and hear the bones crack (that's usually what 'snaps' me out of it) when i come out of it i'm usually out of breath very startled-sometime almost gasp-like and am frozen for a few seconds. I've only had these a few times infront of people and i've learned to cover with ('it was a bug'-and laugh it off)
-also see lots of shadow people, sometimes it's just shadow, sometimes it's (i swear) describable person-not as common-
-but what i hate are the tactile ones. where i feel someone (or many people) behind me, feel hands on back of leg or shoulders, neck or back. Those Really freak me out and get me jumpy.
b2c.

> Well, I do have visual illusions / hallucinations and strange pulsions though whether these are psychotic of simply the consequence of an overactive imaginaton coupled with SPD is still up for debate but they do fall into certain categories.
>
> In terms of the visual stuff big recurring themes :
>
> - Bugs, spiders, flies, insects in general ... I see them appear in the air, wallpapers will transform in to masses of twitching spiders etc ... and the funny thing is, I have no problem with bugs in general, aside from really large numbers of ants, anything else I'm ok with and willing to handle
>
> - Dead / mutilated animals. Lots of dead cats, dead dogs, etc. I figure this is because I love animals so much
>
> - People ... mostly as shadows, vanishing as soon as I look at them. I see them on the roof of my house, darting from teh corner of my eyes, etc.
>
> In terms of the Mental shuff there is really only one "theme" : violence. It feels as though I have a morbidly curious freak inside my head suggesting things like : gee, wouldn't it be fun to grab that stranger there and smash his face agains the wall, I wonder what sound it would make. Or gee, I wonder how it would taste like if you'd grab that pigeon there and bit his head off, would the blood gush in your mouth or would it be mostly feather. Sometimes its directed at myself, curious pulsions about destroying / damaging my own body. Fortunately I don't feel as though I have to do what the "voice" suggests ... just annoying sometimes.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » B2Chica

Posted by Dinah on January 26, 2005, at 9:46:45

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » Dinah, posted by B2Chica on January 26, 2005, at 9:19:44

Apparently it's a not uncommon thing in narcolepsy. And since I also have involuntary naps, the neurologists are convinced it's sleep disorder related.

I just am skeptical because the incidents have a near perfect correlation to times when I've been overstimulated. And the volume only gets really loud when I've been really overstimulated.

It's kind of annoying because the cadence is so clearly human conversation that I can't help but try to make out the words. But of course there are no real words to make out.

Forgive my ignorance, but what are HG/HP episodes?

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » Dinah

Posted by B2Chica on January 26, 2005, at 11:40:35

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » B2Chica, posted by Dinah on January 26, 2005, at 9:46:45

no ignorance...i just use my own abbreviations. both sleep (disorders? issues/incidences.)
HG-hypnogogic episodes occur when going to sleep
HP-hypnopompic occur when awakening.
it is a type of sleep paralysis, but you have dreamstate, extreme sense of fear and a sense of consiousness-knowing you need to physically wake yourself up (like your minds awake but your body is not)... it's quite terrifying.
mine typically occur in multiples as well (so if i get one i have more than one during a night.)

try googling it..it may explain better than i.
thanks.
b2c.

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by pretty_paints on January 28, 2005, at 12:10:26

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES* » Dinah, posted by B2Chica on January 26, 2005, at 11:40:35

Hi guys,

Thanks for all your replies!!

For some reason I didn't get any email notices saying people had replied, so I thought nobody had responded to the post.

Lovely surprise to visit the board and find that people had! Camille Dumont, I was very interested by your posts. Could you tell me more about your symptoms or whatever it is that you think/know you suffer from? Do you have a diagnosis? How about meds? (if you don't mind answering that is!!).

Thanks again to all of you

hugs :)

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by Camille Dumont on January 29, 2005, at 14:38:00

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by pretty_paints on January 28, 2005, at 12:10:26

> Lovely surprise to visit the board and find that people had! Camille Dumont, I was very interested by your posts. Could you tell me more about your symptoms or whatever it is that you think/know you suffer from? Do you have a diagnosis? How about meds? (if you don't mind answering that is!!).

Not at all. In terms of diagnosis lets just say that its a bit blurry and has evolved over time. It went like this (in chronological order)

- Adaptation disorder (whatever its called ... the thing that is less than depression and temporary)
- Major depresssion
- Major depression with psychotic features
- Chronic depression with psychotic features
- Major depression and schizoid personality disorder

Mind you I'm a bit guilty of not being really honest with the p-docs. It took me a while to have the guts to admit what I saw and even now I've never dared to mention the whole violent urges type thing. I'm afraid that if I do talk about them the doctor will not realize that even though I get these urges there is no way I'd act on them and I don't want to end up in the hospital and / or forcibly medicated.

I think I do have depression and SPD and from the results of MMPI-2 I have lots and lots of imagination and when you put pressure or stress someone with SPD they may slip into lalaland and start to see things and hear things just as if they were psychotic even though you still know what is real and what is not real. I've also had depersonalization episodes but I can control and stop them at will now so its not much of an issue now.

Its also very much linked to how tired I am. If I'm sleep deprived it gets very bad. The hallucinations will pop up near me every 5 minutes or so. Its very annoying and I have a hard time reading because my brain will twist the words I see ... usually in a very cynical way. For example, I once saw a sign who said something like : save the earth, think of your children, recycle. When I first saw it I read : save the earth, recycle your children. I couldn't help but visualse a small compost heap with little kiddie shoes around it. Of course it was so weird that I looked twice and the words went back to how they should have been. But it can be annoying when I'm at work.

Usually the hallucinations are so strange that I realize that they can't be true. But then again, I've also wondered about the fact that maybe I'm hallucinating tons of stuff but don't realize that they are not true if they appear "normal" and what not. Maybe I only notice the "strange" and "weird" visions.

In terms of meds I've had a few unfortunate run-ins with atypical APs which did take away the visions but also took away 90% of my mind ... and Zyprexa gave me petit mal seizures so I now refuse to take anything called a mood stabiliser or antipsychotic. I quit Effexor 300mg cold turkey and I'm still on a small dose of Celexa (20mg) which prevented me from feeling the Effexor withdrawal.

I really think its just my personality and my imagination. And I've come to the conclusion that I'd rather keep my imagination even if it means that the visions stay. If I sleep enough and have a lifestyle thats not too stressfull given my personality disorder / type then they remain at a tolerable level and I can work and take care of myself. I see them more as a part of me than a disease / pathological symptom.

 

Not disclosing halluzinations » Camille Dumont

Posted by bimini on January 29, 2005, at 16:30:10

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by Camille Dumont on January 29, 2005, at 14:38:00

This is from an earlier post:

My vision went from perfect, no glasses to multiples, glare and streaks, color toggling, overall pattern, no depth perception, not understanding movement, not recognizing objects, misconstruing the mess of visual information. I could not read as words move or are written with an alphabet I don't recognize.
I reported to my primary care physician that I wasn't able to see right and I was fading out, I was then sent to a neurologist who ordered a MRI scan of the brain. The scan showed a lesion at the occipital horn and several foci, mainly in the parietal lobe. I was prescribed Effexor and betablockers and sent to an ophthalmologist. He gave me glasses for my halluzinations, LOL! so I can see them better. I was accused of beeing high on drugs and urged to seek psychiatric care. I sought help with improving my vision first and started behavioral vision therapy which improved alignment (multiples), teaming (wobble, wavelike effect) and focus. Depth perception now provides better understanding of where things are in relation to me, movement does throw it off to some delayed response. Vision therapy has provided me with direct feedback to when visual processing suspends and for how long. I am mostly not aware as it happens, I am just missing. While all this was helpful for understanding perspective and I learned how to read without jumping all over the place, other peculiar things remained.
Telling my psychiatrist the tiniest bit of what my halluzinations are like prompted the schizophrenic label, I still don't feel understood.
Objects get translated wrong while I am aware of improbables. Well, this did cause me some confusion as to how am I supposed to know when something isn't obvious enough? I got a bit suspicious abaout everything I see, but soon decided that was too cumbersome and just don't worry about it. I might not always know fake from real, does everybody? Our mind fills in a lot of blanks.

bimini

 

Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*

Posted by pretty_paints on January 30, 2005, at 10:09:32

In reply to Re: PSYCHOTIC *THEMES*, posted by Camille Dumont on January 29, 2005, at 14:38:00

Hi Camille,

Thanks for your reply. It was really interesting. And I agree with you that in your case, it does seem to be an integral part of you and your personality.

I am interested though as to how does a doc differentiate between schizophrenia and schizoid personality disorder. What are the differences (if you know)? Most people would look at your symptoms and think *schizophrenia*, know what I mean? I'm just interested as to the difference. Is it because you know a lot of the time that the things you see arn't real? Do you suffer from delusions as well as the hallucinations? And if so, do you believe them?

Thanks again xxxx


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