Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 297035

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Can you email your therapist?

Posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

Just wondered how many of you have the opportunity or would like to have the opportunity to correspond by email with your T?

Those who do correspond that way, how often do you email? I don't mean "therapy" over email, I just mean regular email.

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by Elle2021 on January 6, 2004, at 6:02:44

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

> Just wondered how many of you have the opportunity or would like to have the opportunity to correspond by email with your T?

I have the opportunity. I emailed him once and he never replied...

>I don't mean "therapy" over email, I just mean regular email.

I haven't ever thought of sending him just a casual, "Hi, how are you," type of message. Any letter I write him is strictly based on therapy or something I am having trouble dealing with.

Elle

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by fallsfall on January 6, 2004, at 8:39:01

In reply to Re: Can you email your therapist?, posted by Elle2021 on January 6, 2004, at 6:02:44

I wish I could, but I would probably abuse it, and then I would feel guilty and think that he was mad at me. Tolerating feelings, postponing things are part of what I'm learning in therapy. But, I'm sure glad I see him twice a week!

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by Miss Honeychurch on January 6, 2004, at 8:39:07

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

I would LOVE to email my therapist, but he has never offered me his address.

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by Dinah on January 6, 2004, at 8:44:06

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

I'm not sure mine knows how to use email.

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by Penny on January 6, 2004, at 10:47:53

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

I can email my T or my pdoc. I try to keep the emails to my T succinct and fairly generic, as she reminded me that email is not guaranteed to be private. I've only emailed her a few times, usually about a question (what was the name of that book she recommended, that sort of thing). She usually responds pretty quickly. My pdoc welcomes email, but I don't expect a quick response, due to the large number of emails he gets. But his nurse is quick to respond to email, esp. if I need a script called in.

P

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by pegasus on January 6, 2004, at 11:59:32

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

With my ex-therapist, I went for about a year and a half before he offered me his email address. And then it was because we both recognized that I sometimes communicate a lot more easily when I write. I sent email once or twice over the next several months. But then when he told me he was moving away, I sent him a daily angry email for a while. He was pretty nice about it. And it wasn't all angry. I was pretty mixed up about the whole thing. He had a really good reason for moving and all.

The one thing about email, though, is that he never replied very well. I'd get very short replies to very intense, long emails. Which I guess is understandable. He was also very formal in emails, which was so unlike him in person and very irritating.

-p

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by naiad on January 6, 2004, at 13:51:30

In reply to Re: Can you email your therapist?, posted by pegasus on January 6, 2004, at 11:59:32

I don't have my therapist's email address but wish I did! I would be very tempted to fire off a message after our sessions but, knowing him, I 'm sure there would be boundaries set about what was appropriate. Knowing me, I would honor them but not like it.

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by crushedout on January 6, 2004, at 14:31:54

In reply to Re: Can you email your therapist?, posted by naiad on January 6, 2004, at 13:51:30


I just got my therapist's email address a couple weeks ago, after seeing her for a year and a half. When she gave it to me, she said she wanted to "encourage" me to write to her. I had an embarrassing dream I wanted to tell her about, so I told her I'd use it for that for starters, which I did.

In my email, I told her I was glad to have it because certain things were much easier for me to express in writing, but that I didn't want to abuse it and I didn't think I would. She responded that she wasn't worried about me "abusing" it -- only that she wouldn't be able to respond very substantively so I would kind of be left hanging. But that I could write to her as much as I wanted or needed to. That felt really good, knowing that I could do it that much (that could be a LOT). But I'm sure I'll still hold myself back, just out of embarrassment.

She replies to my emails, and her responses are not cold or informal, but they are pretty short and not at all in depth. She also takes several days to respond (I don't think she checks her email very often, unlike me).

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by Poet on January 6, 2004, at 14:34:25

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

Mine has never offered an email address. I write so much better than I talk, I could really open up to her when I'm not staring her in the face. Then again...

Poet

 

Re: Can you email your therapist? Dinah

Posted by Karen_kay on January 6, 2004, at 15:12:07

In reply to Re: Can you email your therapist?, posted by Dinah on January 6, 2004, at 8:44:06

I'm not sure mine knows how to use email.

*Have you asked him? Does he look dumb? That's just too funny! So, you have a nice looking therapist who can dress himself, yet doesn't always have propper etiquette and can't work a computer? Hmmm...

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by Karen_kay on January 6, 2004, at 15:16:13

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

I'd love to email my therapist. But, things would get ugly! I'd end up saying the things I should have said during the session.

And my therapist knows how to use a computer. But, I doubt he would return my emails, he doesn't return my phone calls, why would he return my emails? I'm sure he would print them out and analyze every word during the next session. And I'd have to sit there and "explain" myself. I'd have to say it is best that I don't have it. And think about what would happen it I had a few drinks and was angry about a session? Oopsie! Bad things! I'm glad I don't have it!

 

Re: Can you email your therapist? Karen_kay

Posted by Speaker on January 6, 2004, at 16:28:21

In reply to Re: Can you email your therapist?, posted by Karen_kay on January 6, 2004, at 15:16:13

If I had a T that didn't return my phone calls I would change...that is just rude let alone not professional! My old T was wonderful about returning calls and my new T at first stated if I needed anything between sessions I should go to ER. I almost quite but then I asked him about it and he stated he does have a pager. He told me it is the policy of his office to not take calls between sessions but he has his own pager for his clients...it would have been a new T for me if not. My old T also was great about e-mail. We had an understanding that he would at least let me know he got the e-mail even if he didn't have time to respond right then. Have you ever questioned your T about not returning your calls? What if it was an emergency...isn't he taking a chance?

 

Re: Can you email your therapist? Karen_kay

Posted by Dinah on January 6, 2004, at 17:02:49

In reply to Re: Can you email your therapist? Dinah, posted by Karen_kay on January 6, 2004, at 15:12:07

He actually probably does have one. (OK, I saw it when I googled him.) I just doubt he uses it very often. When I ask him to promise never to read Babble he sticks his nose in the air and says he doesn't spend time on the computer. And he really does seem computer illiterate.

 

Re: Can you email your therapist?

Posted by Rigby on January 6, 2004, at 17:17:26

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

When I first met with my therapist she gave me a writing assignment ("tell me about the women in your life.") When I asked her how to send it she gave me her email.

I used to write a lot and send a lot. Now I pretty much limit it to dreams--nightmares--and only the more intense ones or ones that I can't figure out.

She responds to aknowledge the email and usually to say that we'll discuss it next time we meet. She likes to keep things "in the room" vs. doing therapy outside of it.

I think writing about your feelings can be therapeutic but not fully. I think that if you get carried away, writing can be a way of detaching from your feelings. I find words numbing at times.

> Just wondered how many of you have the opportunity or would like to have the opportunity to correspond by email with your T?
>
> Those who do correspond that way, how often do you email? I don't mean "therapy" over email, I just mean regular email.

 

Re: Can you email your therapist? tinydancer

Posted by judy1 on January 7, 2004, at 9:44:04

In reply to Can you email your therapist?, posted by tinydancer on January 6, 2004, at 5:41:20

actually that's my main form of communication with my pdoc/therapist. he welcomes it, and I like it because I'm a lot more honest over the internet (and less stressed, etc.) then in person or over the phone. I also e-mail in the middle of the night sometimes, and he has answered within minutes- we're both insomniacs. I don't believe he's ever gone over 24 hours without responding.
take care, judy


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