Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 1466

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Re: therapist revelations

Posted by Newcomer on September 3, 2003, at 12:11:16

In reply to Re: therapist revelations, posted by Rigby on September 2, 2003, at 10:14:32

Hi Rigby

Ordered the book on Amazon and can’t wait to get it now, it sounds ideal. Thanks to you and Fallsfall for the recommendation. It takes the edge off the embarrassment when you know you’re not the only one who has the problem and I hope the book will give me some more clarity in terms of how to deal with it.

I had this stupid situation with my therapist where I avoided talking about anything that showed me in a bad light, the same as when you start a new relationship and only want to show your good side. So after I deal with the embarrassment I’ll have to tackle that if I go back to the same therapist, otherwise it’s a bit pointless if I only want him to know the nice things. Do you think that dealing with your transference helps in your life and relationships? I’d like to think so, but I'm beginning to realize that the person I am is so wrapped up in father figures so to speak, I can’t imagine anything else.

Take care.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by Newcomer on September 3, 2003, at 12:33:48

In reply to I did the Hoffman process, posted by kara lynne on September 2, 2003, at 19:39:41

Hi Kara,

A bunch of people doing psycho drama round my issues! How horrific! Perhaps the Hoffman Process isn’t for me after all. I went to a talk where people who have done it shared their experiences and they were overwhelmingly evangelical about it (but no-one said much about what’s involved), so it’s good to get a balanced view from you. I was keen to do it but being a retiring English person, I’ve gone all faint and wobbly at the thought of psycho drama and group therapy and don’t think I’d manage it very well. If you don’t mind me asking, did you have parental issues that were addressed by the process? I imagine it would be disappointing to go through all that soul-baring and not get something positive and lasting from it.

Gail

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by kara lynne on September 3, 2003, at 18:18:04

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by Newcomer on September 3, 2003, at 12:33:48

Hi Newcomer,
I hate to be the one to dissuade you from something you felt compelled to do, but I do feel it's right to get a balanced viewpoint. And yes, those people are *so* evangelical, and angelic-al, and make it all look so good it's hard to resist. That's what they count on! I guess they stay in some sort of pumped up enthusiasm with their constant involvement. I don't want to make it sound like it was all psychodrama, but you do offer yourself up for some group interaction and it might be a lot for a retiring English person. It was a lot for a retiring American. There were a couple of things that went on that I still wonder about: during one exercise I felt that someone was humiliated publicly in an effort to 'break' him of his pattern. I can't remember how much secrecy I was sworn to about describing these exercises and I don't mean to invalidate every part of it. But I do think that this person was treated quite ignorantly, especially in retrospect. He had OCD which obviously needed to be chemically addressed although at the time I wouldn't have known that. There is a thin line in those situations between a therapeutic environment or public humiliation.

In answer to your question I had (and have) deep parental issues that were addressed by the process. Now that you've got me thinking about it I'll go look through my journals and see if I can't tell you something clearer about that. (I did the process many years ago.)

The premise is a good one and there are some good ideas. I would look at it as one more step along the path with some useful tools and information, not as a quick fix miracle (at least not for me). There's kind of an initial endorphin rush that comes from doing a lot of emotional release--if you end up doing that--but life comes back quickly. Very quickly.

 

Re: In Session suggestion is from Dinah - Thanks! (nm)

Posted by fallsfall on September 3, 2003, at 20:50:31

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by kara lynne on September 3, 2003, at 18:18:04

 

Re: I think it's a universal suggestion by now. :) » fallsfall

Posted by Dinah on September 3, 2003, at 21:10:46

In reply to Re: In Session suggestion is from Dinah - Thanks! (nm), posted by fallsfall on September 3, 2003, at 20:50:31

Everyone just loves that book. I think it should be required reading in therapy school.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process » kara lynne

Posted by Dinah on September 3, 2003, at 21:21:30

In reply to I did the Hoffman process, posted by kara lynne on September 2, 2003, at 19:39:41

I'm just curious. My therapist has advised me against doing any marathon type therapy. He seems to think I haven't the ego defenses to withstand it.

So I have this picture of people dropping like flies. Is it as stressful as he makes it out to be?

 

Ooops!! Thank you, Dinah!! :) (nt)

Posted by Rigby on September 3, 2003, at 23:55:43

In reply to Re: I think it's a universal suggestion by now. :) » fallsfall, posted by Dinah on September 3, 2003, at 21:10:46

nt

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by Newcomer on September 4, 2003, at 9:16:51

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by kara lynne on September 3, 2003, at 18:18:04

Hi Kara,

Please don’t think you’re dissuading me, I want to weigh up the options before doing it and would hate to give up a week of my life and pay all that money for something that isn’t right. So it’s good to have your insight. I was very tempted to do the process (and yes, all those radiant people talking about how it turned their lives around is persuasive) but bearing in mind how I used to struggle so much in one hour of therapy a week, it sounds too intense. Despite that I like the idea of the intensive nature in that you’re forced to deal with your life in one big go and there’s no getting away. Plus, the emotional release would be helpful, it could really give you a kick-start to go on to longer term improvements. But in practice I probably need something gentler.

They put a lot of emphasis on how you get energy from the group and are supported throughout, but I can see that your experience was a little different. I wouldn’t want to do it unless there was a supportive and understanding approach, whereas it sounds like it could get heavy handed. Perhaps I need to have a better go with therapy before considering it. I just feel this strong pull towards it (not sure why) but I have to remind myself to be realistic about what I’m capable of.

Best wishes

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by kara lynne on September 4, 2003, at 11:05:47

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by Newcomer on September 4, 2003, at 9:16:51

I do think you get energy from the group; that's the whole dynamic. And I do think you are supported throughout. That's part of what makes it an environment that doesn't really carry over--you don't have the intensity of the group dynamic following you around in your every day life. But I still question a few things that happened during the time I took it.

I'm sorry if I seem to be contradicting myself. I don't think it compares to something like EST in terms of 'heavy handedness'. In fact, I wouldn't even let that be the deciding factor if I were you. I would try to determine how useful it might be in the long run. And it may be useful for you, I just don't think it's a substitute for therapy.

And I don't know how they bottle all that radiance-- they must put something in the water.

I'm sorry if I'm confusing you more! I would just hate to keep you from something you're that drawn to. There might be something in it for you.

Take care.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by Newcomer on September 4, 2003, at 17:06:33

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by kara lynne on September 4, 2003, at 11:05:47

I'm kinda confusing myself over whether or not to do it, so the best thing is probably to leave it a while. Sounds like you exist in a rare little bubble during the course of the process and I suppose the trick is to translate that into the real world when you get back to day-to-day life.

I hope it was worthwhile for you even though there weren't any miracles. Even if I don't do it, I'm going to ask for a bottle of that radiance stuff.

G
x

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by mywayorthehighway on October 27, 2003, at 8:12:46

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process » kara lynne, posted by Dinah on September 3, 2003, at 21:21:30

I did the process two years ago - it was so well lead and carefully managed - that even as a deeply cynical person I came away realising that there is real love and help available from the process - I would advise you to go with an open heat and mind and trust yourself.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process » mywayorthehighway

Posted by Newcomer on October 27, 2003, at 9:44:51

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by mywayorthehighway on October 27, 2003, at 8:12:46

Thank you for your feedback, I’m glad you had a positive experience. Has it helped you over the last two years? I got the feeling that it might be the sort of thing that gets you all fired up at first, but that wears off and long term the benefits aren’t that great. It’s a big step for me to do it (financially as well as emotionally) so I’d like to feel that it could have long term improvements, perhaps coupled with more mainstream therapy. As you advise, I think that I could go into it with an open heart, but I’m not sure I can trust myself. There seems to be a lot of ‘letting go’ as part of the process and I’m worried that if I let go too much I’ll fall apart and they won’t be able to put me back together again in a matter of days.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by mywayorthehighway on October 27, 2003, at 10:08:20

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process » mywayorthehighway, posted by Newcomer on October 27, 2003, at 9:44:51

Hi - Yes it still works! Initially there is this fantastic euphoria and self-belief. In my case even after two years I know that I use The Process every day of my life. I am aware, I fall into a pattern and can see I am doing it. Yes there is a lot of "letting go" - but when I did my process I went thinking that my emotional baggage was so terrible and shocking that if I let go no one would help me rebuild. But the love and support of my group and the teachers guidance and faith in the real me soon made me appreciate that I was no worse or better than anyone else. The Process is "intense" but the effect is even more so - Have faith - its a very brave decision to decide to do it - the effect is empowering.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by mywayorthehighway on October 27, 2003, at 10:13:19

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process » mywayorthehighway, posted by Newcomer on October 27, 2003, at 9:44:51

If it helps and you want to chat use my e.mail pwilliams@psc.uk.com - I too am a retiring english person LOL

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by Staylor on November 4, 2003, at 15:16:37

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by kara lynne on September 4, 2003, at 11:05:47

It is interesting that you should mention EST. Raz Ingrasci is the President of Hoffman Institute, and was the Director of International Programs for EST in the seventies. As recently as 1990, he was Director of Corporate Affairs of Lifespring (an offspring of EST).

I have heard mixed things about the process. I would be careful before anyone puts their mental health in the hands of someone other than a trained professional.

> I do think you get energy from the group; that's the whole dynamic. And I do think you are supported throughout. That's part of what makes it an environment that doesn't really carry over--you don't have the intensity of the group dynamic following you around in your every day life. But I still question a few things that happened during the time I took it.
>
> I'm sorry if I seem to be contradicting myself. I don't think it compares to something like EST in terms of 'heavy handedness'. In fact, I wouldn't even let that be the deciding factor if I were you. I would try to determine how useful it might be in the long run. And it may be useful for you, I just don't think it's a substitute for therapy.
>
> And I don't know how they bottle all that radiance-- they must put something in the water.
>
> I'm sorry if I'm confusing you more! I would just hate to keep you from something you're that drawn to. There might be something in it for you.
>
> Take care.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by mywayorthehighway on November 5, 2003, at 4:45:04

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by Staylor on November 4, 2003, at 15:16:37

You say : "I have heard mixed things about the process. I would be careful before anyone puts their mental health in the hands of someone other than a trained professional."

That rather implies that the Hoffman teachers are "untrained amateurs" . My experience of The Process and it teachers was one of enormous professionalism and dedication.

You say that you have heard "mixed things" about the process - maybe you could be more specific.

I dont want to be rude here but it appears to me that a little knowledge could be a dangerous thing!!

Best wishes

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by Staylor on November 5, 2003, at 12:47:46

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by mywayorthehighway on November 5, 2003, at 4:45:04

Well you certainly sound defensive. Isn't that a negative trait that should have been bashed out?

According to the Hoffman Website, a majority of the Process Faculty do not have an advanced degree in Pyschology or Psychiatry. They even list Andy Milberg, a porn star, among their process teachers.

I'm not saying the process is entirely bad. I just think people should research it for themselves. They should know the backgrounds of the people to whom they entrust their mental health.

> You say : "I have heard mixed things about the process. I would be careful before anyone puts their mental health in the hands of someone other than a trained professional."
>
> That rather implies that the Hoffman teachers are "untrained amateurs" . My experience of The Process and it teachers was one of enormous professionalism and dedication.
>
> You say that you have heard "mixed things" about the process - maybe you could be more specific.
>
> I dont want to be rude here but it appears to me that a little knowledge could be a dangerous thing!!
>
> Best wishes

 

Re: please be civil » Staylor

Posted by Dr. Bob on November 5, 2003, at 19:21:56

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by Staylor on November 5, 2003, at 12:47:46

> Well you certainly sound defensive. Isn't that a negative trait that should have been bashed out?

Please be sensitive to the feelings of others and don't post anything that could lead them to feel accused or put down, thanks.

Bob

PS: Follow-ups regarding posting policies should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration.

 

Re: please be civil

Posted by Staylor on November 5, 2003, at 20:45:16

In reply to Re: please be civil » Staylor, posted by Dr. Bob on November 5, 2003, at 19:21:56

> > Well you certainly sound defensive. Isn't that a negative trait that should have been bashed out?
>
> Please be sensitive to the feelings of others and don't post anything that could lead them to feel accused or put down, thanks.
>
> Bob


>
> PS: Follow-ups regarding posting policies should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration.

Dr. Bob. I appreciate your forum, but why am I singled out? I was responding to a posting in which I was put down and felt accused. The direct quote was "I dont want to be rude here but it appears to me that a little knowledge could be a dangerous thing!!" Isn't that accusatory? Why didn't "mywayorthehighway" receive the same reprimand?

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by mywayorthehighway on November 6, 2003, at 8:33:38

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by Staylor on November 5, 2003, at 12:47:46

Hi - Thanks for the response - no offence was taken!

I do work on that pattern!!

I quess my experience of the process in the UK could have been different to the experiences others may have experienced in the US.

I was really not worried about what my teacher or the other teachers did when they were not teaching the process. I went in with my eyes open and an enquiring mind.

The process was the first therapy I had ever experienced. It was intense and demanding. I was also very rewarding. It changed my life.

Love

Piers

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by mywayorthehighway on November 6, 2003, at 8:44:57

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by Staylor on November 5, 2003, at 12:47:46

staylor - please accept my apologies

I had no intention of putting you down or accusing you - maybe I was just wanting to say - "I have done the process" "Have you?"

Love

Piers

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by Newcomer on November 6, 2003, at 8:55:39

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by mywayorthehighway on November 6, 2003, at 8:33:38

Because I've been pondering on whether to do the Process, I love to hear anyone's opinion of it - good or bad. It seems to provoke strong reactions, probably because it's relatively extreme and unconventional.

It's been tough making my mind up because unlike mainstream therapy you can't try it out with the proviso that you can quit after a couple of sessions if it doesn't suit you. So everyone's view is worth considering. I have to say I had misgivings that the teachers aren't necessarily qualified psychotherapists, but to echo Piers, I guess you need an open mind (and a degree of trust) to allow it to work for you.

 

Redirect: responding to a posting » Staylor

Posted by Dr. Bob on November 7, 2003, at 2:25:44

In reply to Re: please be civil, posted by Staylor on November 5, 2003, at 20:45:16

> I was responding to a posting in which I was put down and felt accused. The direct quote was "I dont want to be rude here but it appears to me that a little knowledge could be a dangerous thing!!" Isn't that accusatory? Why didn't "mywayorthehighway" receive the same reprimand?

I replied over at PBA:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20031008/msgs/277380.html

Bob

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by kara lynne on November 7, 2003, at 13:40:17

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by mywayorthehighway on November 6, 2003, at 8:33:38

--The process was the first therapy I had ever experienced---

Just a thought: maybe this lended itself to the experience being so effective for you.

Maybe not, but just a thought.

 

Re: I did the Hoffman process

Posted by Staylor on November 7, 2003, at 16:52:17

In reply to Re: I did the Hoffman process, posted by mywayorthehighway on November 6, 2003, at 8:44:57

I’m glad the process worked for you. You seem to be very committed to it, and I do not want to take that away from you or anyone else. I do want people to sign up for The Process with their eyes wide open. The Hoffman Institute is very secretive as to what happens during that week, and who is going to train you.

I am a little bit more conservative. If I am going to turn my mental health over to some one for eight days and seven nights without any contact with the outside world including my support system, I would want to make sure that it is to a trained and licensed mental health care professional. With a licensed professional, one can usually expect that certain ethics and standards will apply.

My other concern is that the Hoffman website lists three research finds on The Process. The first one is an independent study that has not been published yet, the second one was written by a Hoffman Graduate, and the last one was written by a Hoffman board member. I would be interested to read the first study once it has finally been published.


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