Psycho-Babble Administration Thread 441543

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Re: smaller groups--need thread explaining » alesta

Posted by 10derHeart on April 23, 2005, at 23:36:51

In reply to smaller groups--need thread explaining, posted by alesta on April 23, 2005, at 22:28:28

Hi alesta,

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20041218/msgs/441970.html

This is pretty much where it starts back in Jan. Goes on for over three weeks....I couldn't explain it "short and sweet" if my life depended on it... lol. But, I'll bet Alex or Dinah or numerous other posters who are more talented at being concise than I am could do that.

I tend to go round in circles. And the thread eventually got so deep, I just had to stop reading....good luck making your way through it...

Hope this helped :-)

 

Re: smaller groups--need thread explaining » alesta

Posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 23:46:55

In reply to smaller groups--need thread explaining, posted by alesta on April 23, 2005, at 22:28:28

Oh dear.
The topic is a minefield... An absolute minefield.
The idea is that some people find it hard to feel accepted over on social because there are an awful lot of posters over there.
So Dr Bob had an idea that there could be smaller boards that had a restriction on the number of people who could sign up to the board.
Then the discussion went into gated communities and exclusion etc etc. Some people are vehemently opposed to the notion.
I hope that was a fair explanation.
And that other people will jump on in if they have anything to add or clarify...

 

Re: smaller groups--need thread explaining

Posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 0:17:28

In reply to Re: smaller groups--need thread explaining » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 23, 2005, at 23:46:55


ohhhh boy. thanks 10derheart and alex very much! i will say no more, lol..

amy :)

 

my vote

Posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 0:45:31

In reply to Re: smaller groups--need thread explaining, posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 0:17:28

>
> ohhhh boy. thanks 10derheart and alex very much! i will say no more, lol..
>
> amy :)
>
>
dam# it, i have to at least say how i feel about it,..hehe..(if only to possibly prevent this from happening.) i hate this idea..many of us have been here for many, many months, and know many ppl here..to just cut us off from each other, no longer seeing various ppl popping in and out and cutting us off from our friends will hurt..a LOT. sorry, but this feels really unfair..so there are a few ppl who feel left out..i'm sorry for them, but this method of dealing with it is way too high a price to pay..besides, i see a lot of support and inclusion of just about everybody on social right now..and if one or two ppl feel left out, oh well. you can't make the boards perfect, ya know..leave the boards be! just my opinion..this will be a sad day for most of us if this happens..i never expected my friendships of this site would just be cut off..that stinks. all right, i'm outta this place..


amy

 

Re: my vote

Posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 1:04:40

In reply to my vote, posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 0:45:31

< all right, i'm outta this place..

oops. by 'this place' i meant admin, not the whole site..:) bye bye

 

Re: my vote » alesta

Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 4:02:52

In reply to my vote, posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 0:45:31

> dam# it, i have to at least say how i feel about it,..hehe..

:-)
I hope you don't mind my responding...

> i hate this idea..many of us have been here for many, many months, and know many ppl here..to just cut us off from each other, no longer seeing various ppl popping in and out and cutting us off from our friends will hurt..a LOT.

But all the boards that are currently running will keep running just as they are. They won't change. The idea is that some people don't participate on social because they feel overwhelmed by the number of posters / posts there and they might feel more at home on a board where there is a limit on the number of posters who can participate on that board only.

>i never expected my friendships of this site would just be cut off..that stinks. all right, i'm outta this place..

But they wouldn't be cut off. They could continue as usual. But the people who do feel overwhelmed on social would have a place for them as well.

 

Re: my vote » alexandra_k

Posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 9:57:50

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 4:02:52

That's one way to look at it.

Of course, the other way to look at it can no longer be expressed under the civility guidelines, can it?

 

Re: my vote » Dinah

Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 16:19:12

In reply to Re: my vote » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 9:57:50

> That's one way to look at it.
>
> Of course, the other way to look at it can no longer be expressed under the civility guidelines, can it?


Hmm. I think it can.
How about babblemailing your civility buddy???
Oh, Dinah I don't really want to start this up again...
Sigh.
Hug?

 

Re: my vote » alexandra_k

Posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 16:35:52

In reply to Re: my vote » Dinah, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 16:19:12

Neither do I.

I have no need to talk to a civility buddy about it. I'm in no risk of saying something that will get me in trouble. I know a lost cause when I see it and see no point in expending energy on what is done. I did a cost benefit analysis, that came down on the side of staying on Babble, for the moment at least.

I just find it a bit unfair that free discussion is limited to one side.

 

Re: my vote

Posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 16:39:28

In reply to Re: my vote » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 16:35:52

And I did clarify that at one point. I outlined the chain of events, and my conclusion that opposing viewpoints that gave any detail whatsoever were now considered uncivil, and Dr. Bob agreed.

It's in the archives somewhere.

 

Re: my vote » Dinah

Posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 18:45:13

In reply to Re: my vote, posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 16:39:28

I'm sorry. That stuff about the civility buddy was a joke. You do better at being civil than I do.

I'm sorry.

(((Dinah)))

 

Re: my vote » Dinah

Posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 23:50:46

In reply to Re: my vote, posted by Dinah on April 24, 2005, at 16:39:28

> And I did clarify that at one point. I outlined the chain of events, and my conclusion that opposing viewpoints that gave any detail whatsoever were now considered uncivil, and Dr. Bob agreed.
>
> It's in the archives somewhere.

hi dinah,:)
how are you, girl..i wasn't gonna come back over here, but someone emailed me and told me to read your post..thanks for that piece of info..:-)

holy #$#$, i can't believe it is considered uncivil to discuss an opposing viewpoint on this on the motherf$%$$% admin board..what kind of weird, wacked stipulation is that? i knew i should've stayed away from here, but this issue directly involves me, and all of us..

amy

 

Re: my vote » alexandra_k

Posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 23:55:28

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 24, 2005, at 4:02:52

hi alex,
ok, so are you saying that these private rooms will be in *addition* to the main social board? because that is the only way things are going to carry on as normal..i could handle that, no problem..could you go in a little more detail please? your post leaves me with a lot of questions..and i don't mind that you replied at all.:) hope i'm not starting anything here, but i really do not want to be separated from 75% (ballpark guess) of my babble friends.

amy

 

sorry dr b, i lost my cool

Posted by alesta on April 25, 2005, at 0:05:34

In reply to Re: my vote » Dinah, posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 23:50:46

hi doctor, please don't block me without PBCing me first..:) i will try to be civil, but want to be able to discuss the issue if need be without walking on eggshells. thank you dr. bob.

 

also, sorry to anyone else that....

Posted by alesta on April 25, 2005, at 0:28:01

In reply to sorry dr b, i lost my cool, posted by alesta on April 25, 2005, at 0:05:34

i might've offended..i mean i'm *really* sorry..i think just being over here on this board triggers anger in me, as i've had such bad experiences over on this board in the past, and i just can't believe all of this is happening and i had no idea, and now it may be too late. i feel terrible for losing my temper.

amy

 

Re: my vote » alesta

Posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 0:50:07

In reply to Re: my vote » alexandra_k, posted by alesta on April 24, 2005, at 23:55:28

> ok, so are you saying that these private rooms will be in *addition* to the main social board?

Yup. That is indeed my understanding. The rest of the boards would continue as normal.

>could you go in a little more detail please? your post leaves me with a lot of questions..

Hmm. I'm not too sure what your questions are. I guess nobody really knows how they are going to work exactly except Dr Bob and maybe he hasn't even worked out all the details yet. I think the idea may be first come first served or something like that. And the number of posters to the board will be restricted to a certain number (not sure how many). If people don't post for a couple of weeks or whatever then they lose their place and someone else can join up. I'm not too sure but I think the idea is to have as many of them as there are people who want them so if one is full then another may be set up. I think the idea is that some people would feel more comfortable in a smaller group.


IMO I don't think it would change the current boards much. But some people have been worried that it would change things because some of the people off social might prefer their smaller board. I don't know. I just know that in my case I would probably like to be a member of a smaller board - but I'd also keep posting to social as usual because I wouldn't want to miss out on my friends there and also all the new people who come along and all the old people who I don't know very well yet.

With respect to civility...
There was some concern about people saying that small boards were exclusive and stuff like that. The concern was that posters might not feel comfortable joining up to the small boards (if they ever get underway) because posters might think that other posters think they are being exclusionary in joining.

That was what that was about.
You can say you don't like them etc.
But I think you aren't really supposed to call them 'names'.

 

Re: my vote » alexandra_k

Posted by alesta on April 25, 2005, at 1:23:16

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 0:50:07

> > ok, so are you saying that these private rooms will be in *addition* to the main social board?

> Yup. That is indeed my understanding. The rest of the boards would continue as normal.

thanks, alex. well, great. i don't have a problem with the private rooms then. wish i'd known this from the beginning, lol..that's a real load off....phew! now that idea actually sounds like a win-win to me. i want everybody to be comfortable here, and happy. i think it's great to be able to choose.

amy:)


 

Re: my vote » alesta

Posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 1:38:58

In reply to Re: my vote » alexandra_k, posted by alesta on April 25, 2005, at 1:23:16

> thanks, alex. well, great. i don't have a problem with the private rooms then. wish i'd known this from the beginning, lol..that's a real load off....phew! now that idea actually sounds like a win-win to me. i want everybody to be comfortable here, and happy. i think it's great to be able to choose.

I agree...

Though I should probably point out that me and you and Dr Bob might be the only three people who are willing to admit that on admin ;-)

 

Re: my vote » alexandra_k

Posted by alesta on April 25, 2005, at 1:47:08

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 1:38:58

oh dear..shoot, i don't want ppl to hate me for feeling that way..i know how divisive this admin board can be..i just want peace. hope everyone understands. man, i need to go to bed, lol..i think i'm having a rough night being alone..:(

amy

 

Re: my vote » alesta

Posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 2:05:32

In reply to Re: my vote » alexandra_k, posted by alesta on April 25, 2005, at 1:47:08

peace.

I don't think people will hate you
Even though they may hate the idea of small boards...

 

Re: my vote » alexandra_k

Posted by Dinah on April 25, 2005, at 8:02:34

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 1:38:58

> Though I should probably point out that me and you and Dr Bob might be the only three people who are willing to admit that on admin ;-)

If you think that people really are happy at the idea of getting to play behind a glass wall where all their friends can watch and listen, but only some of their friends are welcome to join in, and are afraid to say so for fear of negative input from posters like me, then this poster like me will remove herself from the equation.

It's clear that more people than you would think are happy with the idea of boards where all can see but only some can play or join in or be helpful, and I'm not quite sure I fit in.

Don't worry Dr. Bob, I've blocked myself for a week.

 

Re: my vote » alexandra_k

Posted by 10derHeart on April 25, 2005, at 9:17:12

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 1:38:58

Well, ummm, I agree with you both.

I'll admit it on admin.

(if I am supposed to be scared to say this...too dense to realize it, I guess...)

Ignorance is bliss? ;-)

 

Re: my vote » Dinah

Posted by 10derHeart on April 25, 2005, at 9:30:35

In reply to Re: my vote » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on April 25, 2005, at 8:02:34

Gosh, this seems pretty upsetting to you.
Guess I didn't recall the extent of that feeling about this from the original discussion.

I'm sorry it's so intense, but only because it might take you away or make you censor yourself too much :-( (Not because intense feelings or convictions are *bad* or have no place here. They aren't and they do.)

I think your reasons are sound for being so opposed, having been here in this 2nd home of ours for so very much longer than me, you have a broader base to operate from in forming an opinion. I could be totally off in thinking it sounds okay to try, and end up feeling just as you do. I just can't seems wrap my head around the idea, or envision how it might feel as well as you can.

I'm not bothered if we might disagree on this, that or the other thing. Unless it immediately gets personal or hurtful, I guess. I can't see that. It's not you.

Please don't remove yourself, Dinah.

 

Re: my vote

Posted by NikkiT2 on April 25, 2005, at 9:39:31

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 2:05:32

I'm for them too.

Though, I don't like the idea that everyone can see, but only few can post.. If they're gonna happen, then only the people who can post on them should be able to read them in my opinion.

I would like somewhere safer to post without the whole world seeing my posts..

Though I also prefer a community smaller than what social is now, at the end of the day, there are a number of long term posters here threatening to leave if that happens, and I would hate to see that happening, and to be honest, the whole thing is causing so much stress to some that I think it should just be shelved.

I can understand why people are against them in a way, but the sites I use most have had the "private room" way of running for the last 10 years, and its worked great for them (though I don't claim to have been there the entire 10 years, only 8 of them!)..

Ach.. I better shut.. too full of drugs today (pethedine, valium and two other things too) so likely to say something uncivil if I continue!!

Nikki

 

Re: alex and alesta

Posted by AuntieMel on April 25, 2005, at 10:00:47

In reply to Re: my vote » alesta, posted by alexandra_k on April 25, 2005, at 2:05:32

Actually there are several of us that get distressed when this topic comes up - and the threads get long and hard to avoid.

Since Alesta needs catching up, could I (pretty please) ask you two to do it by babblemail? I know you both have rights to your opinion, but currently it's catch-up info, not new info.

Please don't take this as being rude. I'm really trying to come up with something that benefits all of us.


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