Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 1118215

Shown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Complex Trauma

Posted by denise1904 on January 19, 2022, at 10:18:56

From the age of 17 I've never associated the symptoms of anxiety and depression I experienced with any kind of childhood trauma.

In my mind trauma is what happens to soldiers who have fought in wars and who have seen horrendous things or children who have been beaten, abused and neglected.

I remember such happy times as a child and never had any symptoms of depression until I hit 17, ironically when my life was stable.


Having said that, although I received so much love from my parents, especially from my mum, from the age of 7 or 8 there were problems at home, My mum was seeing other men, two of whom I saw her with and heard her talking to. Both parents out socialising separately, my Mum's night was a Thursday night and I used to dread it because she wouldnt come home until the early hours of the morning and I used to stand at the bedroom window sobbing because I was so scared she wouldn't come home. Then when my parents finally divorced when I was 10, we left my Dad and my friends and I went to live in a strange house, attended a strange school and lived with a strange, not very nice man (my mum's new partner).

I ultimately went to about 8 different schools, partly because my mum kept leaving and going back to this man. there were other things I wont go into but I did experience bullying quite a lot and the feeling that I wasn't really likeable. But at no time during this did I ever feel depressed. I was unhappy at times but I always new things would get better and that I could overcome things. No way did I ever feel like I have since I was 17 when things have been relatively stable. I still went home after a day of being oestrasized and bullied at school and still could lose myself in films, singing and reading books.

I recently started seeing a therapist who was recommended me and he seemed to think that my problems were related to complex childhood trauma and emotions that had never been processed properly. For my part it was a long shot and I duly sat there week after week rehashing the past but it really didn't seem to do me any good. If anything it seemed a bit self absorbed to keep harping on about problems in the past. I'm not quite sure how it was supposed to help.

I mean being bullied, obstrasized and feeling lonely seems pretty trivial compared to a Solider seeing people's body parts blown off or being burnt to death! Or an unwanted child who is physically and emotionally abused by his/her parents!

I'm just wondering what people's thoughts are on this? It seems lately, that the term trauma is being overused. A bit like the term "Narcissist" seems to me to be over used. I've noticed my friends talking about people they know who are Narcissists. In fact they seem to suddenly know an awful lot of them. I don't personally know anyone who I would consider to be narcissistic. but it's like they take a dislike to somebody and google search their traits and come up with the idea that they are narcissists.

Denise

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by Lamdage22 on January 19, 2022, at 12:31:08

In reply to Complex Trauma, posted by denise1904 on January 19, 2022, at 10:18:56

How would you come to consider someone narcissistic if not by informing yourself about it? I don't know if this is the right therapy for you. I came to the conclusion that for me analytic therapy is the right one.

> I don't personally know anyone who I would consider to be narcissistic. but it's like they take a dislike to somebody and google search their traits and come up with the idea that they are narcissists.

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by Lamdage22 on January 19, 2022, at 12:32:02

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by Lamdage22 on January 19, 2022, at 12:31:08

Narcissists are not very much drawn to people who would diagnose them, IE Therapists and Psychdocs

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by undopaminergic on January 19, 2022, at 13:39:48

In reply to Complex Trauma, posted by denise1904 on January 19, 2022, at 10:18:56

>
> I still went home after a day of being oestrasized and bullied at school and still could lose myself in films, singing and reading books.
>
> I recently started seeing a therapist who was recommended me and he seemed to think that my problems were related to complex childhood trauma and emotions that had never been processed properly.
>

Based on the first paragraph above, I can see why your therapist might come to this conclusion (or hypothesis). It sounds like you did not, at the time, particularly react to the adverse experiences you went through.

> For my part it was a long shot and I duly sat there week after week rehashing the past but it really didn't seem to do me any good. If anything it seemed a bit self absorbed to keep harping on about problems in the past. I'm not quite sure how it was supposed to help.
>

I think you need to "feel" it, not just talk about it. When approached from the "right angle", talking can lead to feeling; eg. while talking you may suddenly burst into tears, and so be able "process" it.

-undopaminergic

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by denise1904 on January 19, 2022, at 14:10:40

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by undopaminergic on January 19, 2022, at 13:39:48

> >
> > I still went home after a day of being oestrasized and bullied at school and still could lose myself in films, singing and reading books.
> >
> > I recently started seeing a therapist who was recommended me and he seemed to think that my problems were related to complex childhood trauma and emotions that had never been processed properly.
> >
>
> Based on the first paragraph above, I can see why your therapist might come to this conclusion (or hypothesis). It sounds like you did not, at the time, particularly react to the adverse experiences you went through.
>
> > For my part it was a long shot and I duly sat there week after week rehashing the past but it really didn't seem to do me any good. If anything it seemed a bit self absorbed to keep harping on about problems in the past. I'm not quite sure how it was supposed to help.
> >
>
> I think you need to "feel" it, not just talk about it. When approached from the "right angle", talking can lead to feeling; eg. while talking you may suddenly burst into tears, and so be able "process" it.
>
> -undopaminergic
>

Undopaminergic,

I did cry at times but am I supposed to sit there crying week after week until eventually Ive worked through it and how long is it supposed to take?

Also, I have to say I came off antidepressants and medication whilst having the therapy so that my feeling were more raw.

The recommendation is therapy and meds, I'm not so sure how that is supposed to work when meds often take the edge off the feelings anyway.

Anyway thanks for responding. My point really was that the word "trauma" seems to be bandied about quite a lot lately. It seems to be the buzzword.


Denise

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by denise1904 on January 19, 2022, at 14:14:21

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by Lamdage22 on January 19, 2022, at 12:32:02

> Narcissists are not very much drawn to people who would diagnose them, IE Therapists and Psychdocs

Lamdage,

Thanks for responding. I wish I hadn't gone on to talk about narcissism, it wasn't really relevant to what I was saying. I was just saying that people seem to get labelled narcissistic so much these days and it has become like a "buzzword". Very much like "trauma" seems to have been.

Denise

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by beckett2 on January 20, 2022, at 0:39:07

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by denise1904 on January 19, 2022, at 14:10:40

> Undopaminergic,
>
> I did cry at times but am I supposed to sit there crying week after week until eventually Ive worked through it and how long is it supposed to take?
>
> Also, I have to say I came off antidepressants and medication whilst having the therapy so that my feeling were more raw.

A psychiatrist once told me that after a certain age, sometimes it's best to heal over rather than open up the wound. At first, I was appalled, but after crying every week and feeling raw, I understood what he meant. (I'm not saying this is general advice I'd give people or that it is even correct.)

About trauma, I agree it's used so often it's lost meaning. The way depression or bipolar has. An example is someone who drinks a lot of coffee, gets buzzed, and says, I'm so manic. To add some nuance, medicine has demonstrated clear links between biology and trauma. It enters the social conversation. Does this make sense?

Yes, the same with narcissism and gaslighting. It's pretty pat to say so-and-so is such a narcissist. But with the appearance of a high-profile person who some believe to be a malignant narcissist, everyone is thinking about it and weighing in their mind the new info. It's annoying when the term becomes pop psychology, even if it is a culture grappling with new information and novel phenomena.

The Miriam Webster website even featured narcissist as word of the day and word of the week during 2017 because it was being looked up so often.

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by Lamdage22 on January 20, 2022, at 1:41:25

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by beckett2 on January 20, 2022, at 0:39:07

There are people who experience horrendous events and do not develop PTSD. Not sure if it just biology. Some people are just sensitive. That doesn't mean though that you have to feel guilty for developing PTSD.

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 20, 2022, at 2:34:17

In reply to Complex Trauma, posted by denise1904 on January 19, 2022, at 10:18:56

I had a happy childhood, i had a loving family - my mother socialized and we went to my football ganmes in middle school, all the family was there rooting for me. It was a very happy time. But when i turned 15, my mother married a man in 2001. We moved to another place in texas, and is started high school. I just rerember the pain that started, then got worse, but the real trauma i went through was being ripped off medications, dexedrine, to where i couldnt function, then my parents, i don't know what kind of evil spirit got in to them, but they got abusive, well....close to abusive, not quite. And that horror that i went through, i doenst seem very much trauma when you say it, but the fact i went through high school with pain all over me, then being ripped off medication that were helping me (even though i was abusing them) - the abuse, these medication helped me function, and when they were removed all collpased. I rerember being scared in my room, with them saying move out, or something insultive. That's what happened with me (and let's keep this secret on babble). I think remodeling yourself, or remodeling the way you function with pain, and triggers that can happen to set it off again. I think complex....i don't know what kind of trauma i went through but it was bad. Feel like i went into childhood, being 22 and being treated bad. I'm 34 now, times are moving. But that's what happened with me. It's caused anger problems, when my mom gets mean or bitter with me, i lash out and get abusive with words, and emotional abuse. It made me angry, and have a feeling to attack (keep this on babble) people who abused me. I mean, really attack, not psyhically because that would make you go to jail, but with emotional abuse. I learned it. Anyways, i try to supress the memories and those feelings of being vulnerable, with no help. I think making chapters in your life, you can organize the memoreis and learn to cope with them in the current time. That's all i can write. Hang in there

r

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 20, 2022, at 2:41:03

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 20, 2022, at 2:34:17

but meeting new friends, i put all that truama away, a secret no one would know. But still it caused me to want to get angry, and retailiate back, fight back with people who tossed me around or abuse. This enormous anger that got created. But anyways, im rj, im a regular guy, and i never say a thing about it, only here on babble. Make those pain, memories, organize them, and then find someway to use that review of past to cope with the currnt time. I don't know really what im saying, but find ways to deal with past pain, remodel, don't stay the same

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 20, 2022, at 2:44:25

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 20, 2022, at 2:34:17

let's keep this secret, dont want my friends or family to read, only on babble

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by Lamdage22 on January 20, 2022, at 6:31:19

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 20, 2022, at 2:44:25

Parents are often not perceived to be abusive well into adulthood. There is no reference point before that.

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 26, 2022, at 19:59:26

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 20, 2022, at 2:34:17

yeah i defeintly know that was not a good time, when you grow up you realize what is abuse, but it's caused me such anger problems, it's almost engraved into me...like when someone gets abusive or very bitter it makes me get emotionally abusive with them. Just like they did with me, only more intensly. That is what created the anger problems, those times that i wrote. I think spirituality and god, and relying on god and unseen, supernatural relm for help. That's what i resorted too, not like talking to demons for counsel lol, no no, but just opening mind and trying to find god, look for god for healing all this pain

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 26, 2022, at 20:09:32

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 26, 2022, at 19:59:26

but i think i told too much about myself on the net, i'm a regular guy and im nice and like to help people, im not a angry surge person at all. It's onlly when people get abusive with me, but sometimes like in the bible what jesus said, turn the other cheek when someone hits you. I think that means humility, and doing evil back to them. So, that's kinda how i cope, read scripture and try to find god to heal and take away that pain

 

Re: Complex Trauma

Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 26, 2022, at 20:10:53

In reply to Re: Complex Trauma, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 26, 2022, at 20:09:32

'and not doing evil back to them' what jesu said after you turn the cheek

i always forget to put a word in a sentence, typos


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