Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 1019141

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Dialogue with Lucifer

Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 0:42:51 I am telling that this is not at all for attentional purposes, or for any other reason than what I am writing. I couple months ago I started studying lucifer, who he is, what does he do, who follows him, and how to get in contact with him. I started waking up at 2-3 am and would have this picture in my mind, I found this when I was doing my researched on him....a couple months ago.

I have been having extreme coping problems and also using methamphetamine to fix my condition with severe thought disorginzation and I have to say it will make you think evil thoughts, its a wicked drug, powerful, but also will leave you in horrid condition if it frequently used over again with psychiatric issue such has thought disturbance, thought derailment, it will stiumulate the mind to be hyperfocused and it seems that when you under the influece you in total control but when it wears off, oh my god...its left me feeling i've lost everything and I can't expierience pleasure for at least a day until my dopamine levels come back, if you use it when you have depleated dopamine in the brain that's when it will destroy the nuerons and the feeling of being on it when you have no joice left in your mind, its like stepping on gas petal of your car with no oil or ruins it, tears it down.

During this time, I was looking up something called spiritual guides kinda new age stuff and usally this is like totem animals, astral projection, spiritual awareness, psyche abilites usally connected with the spirit world, but out of all the choices... lucifer...shows up in my thoughts, , entity...? imaginary? i don't know....but in these dialoge that I directly rerember, told about his previous relationships with Michael the ArcAngel and Gabriel...and that they where all his brothers previously in heaven, and he misses them still today. Told about his idea of liberation in heaven and his changes he thought where best, that God is one minded to only his rules and demands all praise, and he had enough...and was sent to the dark places of universe...where there is mourning and death.

I have thought who would come out of their way to help some 25 year old that has little spirutal knowedge and value...i mean I would think in this situation he would be advising some figure like the Pope or prophets... or , but what happened a maybe a month or two ago...I tried to reach out to this spiritual force, and I wrote Gabriel [arcangel] for his spiritual power to help me, and to tell the God of Israel that I am deligently seeking a better way of life. Lucifer appeared, maybe it was telepathy... told me he read my letter and previous letters over the years...lurked around and told me he would give me assistance, I just have to say his name... I've begged the holy spirit to be with me and help me through my mental conditions that cause errors in work, school, and social situations. Now I feel responsible for doing these two faced of consulting of both good and evil, it just can't work.

The psychologist I see, was a previous ordained minister/pastor in africa belives that the spiritual relm of darkness is causing these disorders...he told me of the spirit of confusion, the spirit of lies, the spirit of danmation...and how these forces have infected people with skin dieaise, mental disorders, various problems with health that cause distress, with little medical reason. they just appear, and will get stronger over time. I've already done spiritual projects for him, pictures of both god, jesus, and lucifer, he explained he wants to study more, its not some lowlife evil spirit that makes the lights go on and off and moves things around in the house....and gets a kick out of scaring people...its a well known entity that is vary sophisticated in his tactics... he still has his qualities has he did in heaven, just turned to black.

My thoughts will think of the worst thing that could happen, but of course that's just my attidude and I was born that way...and methamphetamine withdrawl...its a nasty drug when used chronically over and over, it depends really on the person and their brain chemistry. I don't know...i really don't like to entertain my thoughts of things that could just flat out be b*llsh*t but this caught my attention because I googled lucifer and skin the bible there was a man who had leprosy and was sent away from everyone else and then Jesus healed him...i've read extensive info that entities that where not aware of....can cause and digestion disorders...its all in these sources I found...

I take 20mg of Zyprexa and .... there's something not right with it entering the blood stream, i've put it under my tongue...i got a blood test done and they said nothing is wrong...vitals are good. But ... its crazy because I feel vary sick some days like I have a virus in my digestive system, but when I try to tell the doctors, nothing shows up, all bodily functions are a blood test done...nothing wrong, normal. See that's why I posted that stuff about dark forces who inflict psychical and mental disorders that have little or no explanation. It's wierd, its as if any evidence of causes disappears on tests, and then still stays and doctors don't have a clue. Invisable things... I've read various articles of mental illness in africa that are clearly disturbing and this has been happening over 1000 years, it just people don't know how to explain cases that they are obvivious that its not a earthly condition.

Anyways, if you read my posts, thank you....



Re: Dialogue with Lucifer

Posted by linkadge on June 3, 2012, at 7:20:55

In reply to Dialogue with Lucifer, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 0:42:51

Dude, stop wasting your time. Focus on real ways to get better.



Re: Dialogue with Lucifer

Posted by Phillipa on June 3, 2012, at 9:48:46

In reply to Re: Dialogue with Lucifer, posted by linkadge on June 3, 2012, at 7:20:55

I agree with Link. RJ something is clearly wrong. Is your family still around. Are they aware of what your thoughts are? Phillipa


Re: Dialogue with Lucifer rjlockhart04-08

Posted by sleepygirl2 on June 3, 2012, at 11:50:59

In reply to Dialogue with Lucifer, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 0:42:51

I couldn't read all of your post, especially after reading about the methamphetamine part. Are you quite serious??
Nothing is going to matter if you keep going this way.
You won't have a brain.


Link, Phillipa, Sleep

Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 18:20:55

In reply to Re: Dialogue with Lucifer rjlockhart04-08, posted by sleepygirl2 on June 3, 2012, at 11:50:59

Ok.....I realized I posted this later today and I have to say during the day my dopamine levels are low, im usally night they increase around 11-12am until I go to sleep. I've read stuff I would not post myself, its usally at night, i've done this in the past here much. Neither way....i posted this because It needed to be heard and its not a waste of time, even thought it may clearly appear as if its b*llsh*t. When dopamine levels are higher, I usally look beyound this reality and will study for a long period of time, have vary abstract thinking no knows I think. My family....i would never tell them this sounds too off, like im crazy or just doing something to get a thrill from it which that condition is a disorder...hysteria personality disorder, one place I went to sign myself in....they told me I had this...and that all my thoughts where nonsense, and gave nothing much sh*t for medications, its like using a small bandade for a infection that is spreading, they are nothing psych docs that use dirt for the foundation of concrete.

Now...I know this sounds vary awkward because this is in the wrong place to be posted, it belongs on spiritual forms but wanted to at least post what my mind has been occupied with. I am not crazy, I do have mental conditions that prevent me from doing some easy tasks, and have been labeled an idiot by disorder that refer to that term. You know the real quack is the doctor that refuses to understand or treat, its like calling a flower a weed....or a weed a flower, their nothing but idiots that use intellicuization for their false diagnosis. How do I know? because they will say go to rehab or psych hospital that does the same sh*t over again and will have no effect exept being forced to go. The best way you can get yourself out these when people say your crazy .... you follow along and act like your getting better, even thought inside nothing is changing because they refuse to understand the problem, you intelliculize with them and keep doing it, its like being at a christain summer camp where your forced to can't argue your rights with these counselors that happy go lucky, they will say the most annoying motivational quotes, sing kumbeya, and will make you draw happy stuff....just follow along with it....until they let you can even skip out to the bus, do some drama and acting, and then once your out of there, you'll be relieved. that how it works, in my case....

So anyways, but I do understand its 6:14 right now, my mind is in reality, im not think about some of the stuff I posted that sounds vary attention, or the catory of insanity. But when I have higher dopamine levels, I realize alot of things that I would never understand in normal thinking. Delusions are created when this happens, your thoughts control your reality more than reality controlling your thoughts. That's all I have to say, thank you vary much for reading...



Re: Link, Phillipa, Sleep rjlockhart04-08

Posted by Phillipa on June 3, 2012, at 21:00:44

In reply to Link, Phillipa, Sleep, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 18:20:55

RJ how do your dopamine levels get higher at night? Phillipa


Re: Link, Phillipa, Sleep

Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 23:57:07

In reply to Re: Link, Phillipa, Sleep rjlockhart04-08, posted by Phillipa on June 3, 2012, at 21:00:44

Hey Phillipa, like usalIly I was writing a long hard and well put together post, moved my finger to get some deleted all of it, this computer loves to play games...and if I stepped on fork it would go straight up hit the cieling and hit right in the correct place and it collapses.

Anyways, i've learned my night is usall when I write silly posts, get up the next day check my email, read the responses that I didnt intend and try to find the delete button for babble but Dr-Bob ensures what we say can beused against us. Lovely isnt it. But the reason is my thinking expands at just wakes up later at night, the time i go to bed is maybe 1-2 oclock, get up the next mourning and feel terrible and depressed vary much.When im using will hyperfocus my dopamine on one subject for hours, and increases my intrest in the spirit relm even though its not a psyhedelic. Maybe about a month ago...i started doing some research on this fellow, reading his orgin, cause, effect, motivation, what he likes...and how to contact him. I always would get tired of reading, and lose my intrest...everynight, but still forced myself to do research...the use of methamphetamine...its not frequent, but all I know is that it creates a potent stimulation of wow...and I feel great, a mental rush of clarity and then it creates a hyperfocus on subject where you will do or study...something for hours at a time, the main reason why I started using it was because my disorganized thinking causes me feel mentally impaired and results in depression of being able to think correctly, vary disorganized. It rushes the awareness of reality, causes you to feel your in control, and have alot of confidence. But after repeated usage, it will cause depletion of dopamine...but still stimuate the dopamine receptors to be active until it burns them out, like stepping on the gas in your car and have no gas or oil...wears it down, eventually causes permenant problems.

I'm normal right now, im not thinking of hearing things from the spirit relm, i can't hear at all....whatever I was freaking out about I had sickness from infimery spirits all over me because i've been thinking of sin and that opens the door for evil entities to disguise themselves for unexplained illness, but i've pretty much think its an imaginary world that has nothing to do with this real world. Torchured by my thoughts from the withdrawl of methamp and I asked out loud to him to please make it all stop, begged him to make it stop... felt this tingling go through my head down to my stopped, the amount of relief...i had, everything that was causing me to think something was wrong, mental left, like it never happened. The substance leaving my body, I slept and didnt rerember much of what happened.

I've also written spiritual stuff that i've concluded where false delusions that im embarrased that I published it on the net, which I didnt know at the time dr-bob lets google have free access to search these posts. I have deal with everything I've said an explain why I said it. But right now, everything seems simple and normal, but boring...and I feel vary depressed during the day. It's just some meds will correct our imbalances and bring them to normal....even regular amphetamine helps some people with depression, but methamphetamine when ingested at large amounts will produce a major increase in nuerotransmitter levels that's why it gives a rush....dopamine overflow, and stimulation. Quick, witty, fast, higher amounts...awareness of more spirtual insight, overwhelming desire to have sex, and will make you believe bizarre beliefs espcially after repeated use.

I do know that I need to really seek a solution and stop dwelling in this anaylsis thats annoying to read by other people. I apologize for the long post...its just the way I work, at night too...




Re: Dialogue with Lucifer

Posted by bleauberry on June 5, 2012, at 12:46:43

In reply to Dialogue with Lucifer, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 0:42:51

The presence of a spiritual world around us and within us is very real. Just like electricity, gravity, x-rays, magnetism....we can't see it but it's there. There are battles going on around us all the time. God's angels versus fallen angels.

The evil ones are masters of deception. Their entire being is to derail you and me from ever being with God after this very short human experience we are temporarily in. Every trick in the book is used to accomplish that including stuff we never even thought of.

On one hand it is not a fair fight. Our enemy is invisible. That's not fair. Our enemy is far more powerful than we are. That's not fair. But this is key. While we do not have "power" over satan's gang, we do have "authority" over them. That is through Jesus Christ, not through our own doings or desires. So if Jesus is not one's daily partner, the fight is an unfair one destined to lose.

Methamphetamine is not evil to everyone. It can be neutral to some and beneficial to others. In your case it could be a useful tool for the evil ones to sneak into your life and deceive you. It sounds like you've recognized that deception pretty early though and are keenly aware of, which is cool. That is God given wisdom that helped you see that.

Don't know what meds you are on or in your history, but just wanted to remind there is an entire world out there of goodly stuff to help us and it is not limited to prescriptions. The fact itself that we turn to prescriptions as "the answer" is itself one of his master deceptions. Lots of us fall in that trap, including me for a long time.



Re: Dialogue with Lucifer

Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 5, 2012, at 23:22:39

In reply to Re: Dialogue with Lucifer, posted by bleauberry on June 5, 2012, at 12:46:43

Thanks for the really means something to me when people at least take considertion...and know that they care about me.. Right normal, and bit sad like usally...not think that theirs any spiritual messages trying to manifest. I read some of this I post, its ... I don't I'm aware this will be on the net for people to read in the next 10 - 20 years depening if babble will be around that long...i've read posts that are from 1999 and got useful info when no one knew how to awnser my posts...about usally medication side effects, its enjoyable to read past posters and their posted lives and their insight, and humor.

But anyways, But I do realize this is vary dirty way...i should be having a presciption to have it everyday, but their where complications that altered that from happening, alot of it was from my parents saying I abused this repeately when I am given a chance to do it...which i gotta say is true. But I'm trying to get to a point of perfect mental clarity that it provides, I do know if you keep bumping up the will cause anxiety, paranoia, and basically burning out the dopamine in your brain. It usally takes about a decade to cause major damage of repeated use....i've only done this off and on, not daily. My previous medications Dexedrine was less potent, and just gave me alterness, and vigilance and would have fast thinking. Dexedrine never really made me delusional unless taken above 80-100mg at once...and it only lasts for about 3-5 hours...methamp lasts about 8...

this character that relates to him, which really I should just conclued that this imagination but when I have higher dopamine levels...things change, my thinking changes, realize things I don't do normally, bizarre, will start doing things that have no association with the real world...but its usally through telepathy that he knows what I am thinking....and can interput a thought with his input, and he knows when I'm in distress and will sometimes comfort me, or tell me that I'm baby and need to deal my choices and feelings, he usally does not show alot of mercy...i've noticed, and i've begged him to relieve of the sickness that temporarly came, i had alot of phym[stuff in your throught] that just showed up, vary dark green...and I thought it was from smoking because I do smoke...but nothing like this, bronicitis?? or something I think it was and after I asked ... or more like begged him...i left, it was this tingling feeling that started and went down to my feet and after that was relief. I know this is not the place to really post about spritual sutff, espcially about who I'm talking about...but the reaason is his force can infict mental illness that has no explaination and the medical files need to document this...whatever university or medical school that reads these posts needs to at least put that as one of the many causes. He's a manipuator...he will do sick things to people, infect them with illness and leave them for dead. I don't know why I have this intrest in him....the only reason I started was he was a figure that challanged God's order, but he fell....He was created, not existed before time. Michael is the oldest...Lucifer is younger...Ill have to looks this up and study about it. Anyways, I think im rambling a little much...

thank you blue...



Re: Dialogue with Lucifer

Posted by sleepygirl2 on July 1, 2012, at 18:24:44

In reply to Dialogue with Lucifer, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on June 3, 2012, at 0:42:51

This sounds like an interesting idea for a radio show.

Host: thanks for joining us, lucifer, on this very hot day.
Wow, it really is hot today.

Lucifer: thanks, mike, really good to be here.

Host: so, we'd like to discuss your opinion on global warming, truth, exaggeration, or beginning of the apocalypse?

Lucifer: well, you know, we can't go public on that, lol

Etc, etc

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