Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 967391

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Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb

Posted by maxime on October 30, 2010, at 6:54:00

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Willful, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 6:10:33

> I've been skipping them on and off because I don't want to sleep so much. I'm busy looking for a job. I thought I'd be OK. I thought I was over my borderline personality.
>
> I don't want to freaking depend on meds! Gawd, my condition isn't even supposed to improve with meds. I thought I had learned new ways to cope.
>
> People with BPD are not supposed to need meds.

That's not true about the meds. I don't have time to find it now, but there are meds to help BPD. An antipsychotic is one of them ... your risperdal

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Willful

Posted by Maxime on October 30, 2010, at 8:22:40

In reply to Re: I'm so upset!, posted by Willful on October 29, 2010, at 23:59:59

> You may need to adjust your medication regimen. Have you cut back recently on any of your meds, or skipped them?
>
> These thoughts, as you realize, are extremely irrational and you need to get back on your meds, or possibly readjust the dosages.
>
> This is obviously a precarious situation, so you need to act promptly to address it. Calling the distress line is a good idea, and certainly keeping up very strenuously with your meds.
>
> I hope you feel better soon,
>
> Willful

Deneb admits to not taking her meds. I guess they were working. Deneb if you don't like the way a med makes you feel, maybe you could go see your pdoc and see if there is something else you could try. Abilify is now available in Canada. I don't think there is as much sedation with it as in Canada. Good luck!

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Maxime

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 9:16:14

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Willful, posted by Maxime on October 30, 2010, at 8:22:40

I think my nightly meds make me sleep more. It's hard for me to get up in the morning. I don't really tell if it is because of the meds or if it is because I just love to sleep!

I do love sleep so I don't have a problem with sleeping more in theory, except when I have to get a lot of stuff done. Up to me, I'd sleep 10+ hours every day.

Sometimes I stay up too late and I have to get up early so I skip my nightly meds in order to not be too tired to get up in the morning. I've been doing that lately because of my job hunt. I had a lot of workshops and appointments with my employment specialist. When I wasn't looking for a job, I would have no problems just sleeping through the afternoon.

I'm pretty sure I can't get Abilify. I'm sure it isn't covered under the Trillium drug program. Even Inderal LA isn't covered. Generic propranolol is covered though. I'm pretty sure Abilify is one of those ultra expensive drugs so there is no way I'd be able to afford it.

Also I think pdoc's goal is for me to not have to take any antipsychotic at all. She doesn't like them.

 

Re: Can't get over extreme anger » Deneb

Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2010, at 11:23:57

In reply to Can't get over extreme anger, posted by Deneb on October 28, 2010, at 23:19:25

IMO, borderline personality disorder is the behavioral outcome of underlying physiological reactivity.

You can learn to change your behavioral patterns, but that doesn't change the physiology.

When your life is stable, you *may* be able to cut back on your meds. Doing it when your life is not stable may not be advisable.

Even if you do cut back, slowly so as to make certain your life remains stable, you may always need to monitor your reactions and take meds as needed. That's what I do now and what I always will need to do.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb

Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2010, at 11:27:19

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Maxime, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 9:16:14

> Also I think pdoc's goal is for me to not have to take any antipsychotic at all. She doesn't like them.

When your life is stable, and if you choose to work on this goal, could you please ask your pdoc to increase the frequency of your appointments as you reduce your meds, and to not ever reduce your meds as she is going away on vacation? She's done that at least once, probably twice, and it annoyed me no end, even though in many things I really like your pdoc.

You can have her contact me if she likes and I'll tell her in person.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Dinah

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 12:04:23

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb, posted by Dinah on October 30, 2010, at 11:27:19

Wow Dinah, you'd really talk to pdoc? Thanks! You're a good friend. :-)

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb

Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2010, at 12:30:23

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Dinah, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 12:04:23

Yes, I am a friend.

And I feel *that* strongly about her reducing your meds right before going on a long vacation.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Dinah

Posted by maxime on October 30, 2010, at 18:13:12

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb, posted by Dinah on October 30, 2010, at 12:30:23

Hi Deneb, you can get the following workbook at Chapter-Indigo. I used part of it and I found it to be helpful.
http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/search/?keywords=DBT&pageSize=12

I really find it hard to believe that in all of Ottawa that there is no DBT group. I don't think you are lying.

Anyhow,I found this on the internet, you should give them a call.

Ottawa Network for Borderline Personality Disorder Ottawa, ON
http://www.on-bpd.ca/
613 820-8203 Type: Non profit with charitable status
Ages served: All ages
Languages: Bilingual
Fees: None
Type: Non-profit with charitable status
Area served: Ottawa-Carleton

Organization that supports relatives of persons with the diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder.

Offers a Family Connections Group, which is a 12-week series for family members with a relative who has a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder (BPD), or symptoms of the disorder. The course provides: Education on BPD; Research on BPD; Skills training based on Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) in the context of a supportive group environment. The information presented is based on effective treatment theories and practices, and the latest research findings to provide the foundation for a better understanding of this complex disorder. For parents, spouses, children, and siblings of someone with borderline personality disorder. No fee required.


 

Re: I'm so upset! » maxime

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 18:57:46

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Dinah, posted by maxime on October 30, 2010, at 18:13:12

That BPD group won't help me because my parents don't speak English. My sister has her own life. I really don't affect my parent's life very much.

They don't know anything is wrong.

 

Re: I'm so upset!

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 19:00:12

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » maxime, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 18:57:46

I don't think that BPD group is about helping the person with BPD. I think it's more about supporting family members who have to deal with a person who has BPD. I think I've actually found that group before.

It sucks, but there is more help for families of people with BPD than for people with BPD themselves.

 

Re: I'm so upset!

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 19:05:15

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Dinah, posted by maxime on October 30, 2010, at 18:13:12

There may be a DBT group in Ottawa, one catch though, it is for women in the prison system. I've asked my pdoc about DBT groups and there really isn't anything in Ottawa for normal regular people with BPD who are not in prison or who are inpatient in the psych hospital. It really sucks, but DBT is reserved for the sickest of the sick.

 

Re: I'm so upset!

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 19:22:15

In reply to Re: I'm so upset!, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 19:05:15

Thinking about the lack of DBT in Ottawa is making me upset. I just need to give up on that altogether. It's not going to happen unless I move to Toronto or something. Even if there was DBT, it probably takes like 2 years just to get in.

I just found out there isn't a DBT group for inpatients either now. There just isn't a DBT group at all. It is so depressing.

I've explored other options, like finding other free or very low cost therapists. I saw a student T once, but she had to video tape every single session and I didn't like that. Another T worked for a charitable organization. I could only see her once every 2 weeks and we weren't a good fit.

I can't afford a psychologist. There is just not way. They cost like $200/hour.

All I have is pdoc and the best she can do is see me for 30 mins every 2 weeks at most. I used to see her every week, but then she told me she couldn't do that anymore.

I really just need to give up on the DBT.

 

Re: I'm so upset!

Posted by emmanuel98 on October 30, 2010, at 20:05:23

In reply to Re: I'm so upset!, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 19:22:15

You can always buy Marsha Linahan's book, which I think is called DBT for Borderline Personality Disorder. I'm not sure of the title, but you can find it on amazon. It's a workbook. I bet anything that there are on-line DBT groups who use Linehan's materials. That might help. Just doing the work in the workbook, practicing daily, would help if you can't find a group. I live in Boston and even here, in this medical mecca, DBT groups are few and far between. I got into one that had a long waiting list because I knew the leader and had been in the group with her a few years ago. She just jumped me ahead. But that was extremely lucky. It's one of only two DBT groups I know about that take patients from off the streets rather than taking patients who've been in-patient at the same hospital.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » emmanuel98

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 20:09:02

In reply to Re: I'm so upset!, posted by emmanuel98 on October 30, 2010, at 20:05:23

I already have that book. It's kind of hard to do when you're just reading it through by yourself. I'm no good with self help books.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb

Posted by floatingbridge on October 30, 2010, at 20:39:18

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » emmanuel98, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 20:09:02

My best dbt work was in a group


Did you have a chance to check out ACT? I can't boost it--never tried it, but thought I saw Canadian chapters.

What part of Canada are you about? If I have time tonight, I'll look.

fb

 

Re: I'm so upset! » floatingbridge

Posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 21:11:37

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb, posted by floatingbridge on October 30, 2010, at 20:39:18

No, not yet. I'm in ottawa.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » floatingbridge

Posted by maxime on October 30, 2010, at 22:19:45

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb, posted by floatingbridge on October 30, 2010, at 20:39:18

> My best dbt work was in a group
>
>
> Did you have a chance to check out ACT? I can't boost it--never tried it, but thought I saw Canadian chapters.
>
> What part of Canada are you about? If I have time tonight, I'll look.
>
> fb


DBT was meant to be done in a group along with one one-on-one session. It's usually a package. My program was 9 months but I wish it had been longer because it was a lot of skills to learn in 9 months.

 

Re: Can't get over extreme anger » Deneb

Posted by Zyprexa on October 31, 2010, at 0:11:37

In reply to Can't get over extreme anger, posted by Deneb on October 28, 2010, at 23:19:25

I take a sedating AP for Extreme anger. Zyprexa and perphenazine.

 

Re: I'm so upset!

Posted by Zyprexa on October 31, 2010, at 0:36:36

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Willful, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 6:10:33

I think the meds are helping you. If they make you less angry and help you sleep, that means they are good for you! You said you feel better when you can sleep. I think if you took the meds you would have an easyer time finding a job.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb

Posted by floatingbridge on October 31, 2010, at 13:10:12

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Willful, posted by Deneb on October 30, 2010, at 6:10:33


> I don't want to freaking depend on meds! Gawd, my condition isn't even supposed to improve with meds. I thought I had learned new ways to cope.
>
> People with BPD are not supposed to need meds.

Hi Deneb,

How is it going today? I hope you're feeling a bit better.

I don't think most people want to be on meds--I never did. I even did strict, no med cbt for awhile. My cbt coach told me I needed meds. :( I cried my eyes out, but it's true. I feel better (much better) on them.
My understanding of BPD is along the lies of what Twinleaf (?) said about an underlying dysregulation. In some ways, BPD is similar to C-PTSD, which is my dx.

I think there is much misunderstanding about BPD, like 'if only I could do this or that better', or even the idea that BPD shouldn't respond to or need meds, when at the heart of it lies a biological dyregulation.

I hope you can take it easy on your self Deneb :) At least that's what I'm working on. And btw, I have lots and lots of triggers :(

Hope today is a good one for you.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » floatingbridge

Posted by Deneb on October 31, 2010, at 13:41:45

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb, posted by floatingbridge on October 31, 2010, at 13:10:12

Hi floatingbridge,

I'm feeling a lot better this morning. I took some extra Risperdal last night. I was so upset I didn't even bother to brush my teeth or change or anything. I just crawled into bed and rode through the worse of the pain.

I think I need to sedate myself this week and hope I get over this.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb

Posted by floatingbridge on October 31, 2010, at 14:23:29

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » floatingbridge, posted by Deneb on October 31, 2010, at 13:41:45

Hi Deneb,

Ugh. What an awful few days for you. I don't know you very well...but making yourself comfortable and being extra kind to yourself makes sense. Fluffy slippers? Popcorn and T.V.?

Feel better very soon.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb

Posted by maxime on October 31, 2010, at 14:34:37

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » floatingbridge, posted by Deneb on October 31, 2010, at 13:41:45

> Hi floatingbridge,
>
> I'm feeling a lot better this morning. I took some extra Risperdal last night. I was so upset I didn't even bother to brush my teeth or change or anything. I just crawled into bed and rode through the worse of the pain.
>
> I think I need to sedate myself this week and hope I get over this.

Deneb, try not to go in the opposite direction. You've just gone a long time without taking your meds. Don't over take either. Just take them as prescribed. Good luck and I hope you feel better.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » floatingbridge

Posted by Deneb on October 31, 2010, at 15:56:19

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb, posted by floatingbridge on October 31, 2010, at 14:23:29

Thanks floatingbridge

I feel OK right now, just a bit depressed, but nothing like last night.

 

Re: I'm so upset! » maxime

Posted by Deneb on October 31, 2010, at 15:58:26

In reply to Re: I'm so upset! » Deneb, posted by maxime on October 31, 2010, at 14:34:37

Thanks Maxime,

I am still taking them as prescribed. Pdoc said I could take an extra 0.5 mg Risperdal for my crises. I just took an extra 0.25 mg.


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