Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 330066

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Re: OCD or BP?

Posted by snapper on April 7, 2004, at 22:20:27

In reply to Re: OCD or BP? snapper, posted by simus on April 7, 2004, at 21:41:48

Simus, no problem and no offense taken. I agree that OCD can def help with detail oriented careers
I used to run my biz like clock work and I really think it was to a point of too much obsession. I'm just looking to feel better too, like most on this board. The AHA reflex response is probably pretty common for a lot of people. I am glad that you have your anxiety and depression under control enough to be able to still work.I really miss it! My dep. makes me feel retarded (memory),and it's so dibilitating !
peace
snapper

 

Re: OCD or BP? snapper

Posted by simus on April 7, 2004, at 22:34:31

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?, posted by snapper on April 7, 2004, at 22:20:27

> I am glad that you have your anxiety and depression under control enough to be able to still work.I really miss it! My dep. makes me feel retarded (memory),and it's so dibilitating !

Sadly, I am not working. I started a total med adjustment in November. I worked a few hours in December and January, but finally had to go on extended sick leave in February. I just found out last week that a permanent replacement for me was found. It really was for the best, because even now after all the progress I have made, I still would not be able to handle the job.

Hang in there. I don't know how long you have been going through this, but I have been battling long enough to know that it can and does get better. Surprisingly, the memory does come back and all is not lost as I had originally feared at the beginning of this ordeal.

God bless.

 

Re: OCD or BP? simus

Posted by snapper on April 7, 2004, at 22:54:51

In reply to Re: OCD or BP? snapper, posted by simus on April 7, 2004, at 22:34:31

simus, sorry to hear you had to make the job transition! I have been going through this ordeal for 14 years now. I used to own my own business and the stress of it just made my underlying mood disorder worse and I lost *everything* in 98'
For a long while when I owned my biz, I was able to function. But the stress just compounded stress and so on... What kind of med changes did you have to go through?
snapper

 

Re: OCD or BP? snapper

Posted by simus on April 7, 2004, at 23:38:44

In reply to Re: OCD or BP? simus, posted by snapper on April 7, 2004, at 22:54:51

I have been going through this for nine years now. Well, the meds part of it anyway. I dealt with the OCD and the depression all my life, but when the panic attacks started, so did the meds. I started on Paxil (with Xanax), then went to Zoloft. I did ok on Zoloft for a couple of years. Then I switched to Effexor. I did quite well for a few years on Effexor, but the effects seemed to be waning. So in November my doctor started to wean me off Effexor and he added Lexapro. He also added Seroquel for insomnia and changed me from Xanax to Xanax XR. Well, in an attempt to make a long story shorter, I had withdrawal effects from the Effexor. Lexapro was not only ineffective, but I still faced the side effects. And three days on the Seroquel turned me into a zombie and threw me out of commission for almost three weeks just before Christmas. I developed an addiction to the Xanax XR, which I broke in January (then went back to a lower dose of regular Xanax just at bedtime for sleep). Then three weeks ago, my doctor took me off of the Lexapro and put me on 150mg of Wellbutrin XL. I saw immediate improvements. The depression started to lift the first day. The anxiety was not too bad. Still have OCD to some degree, but I always did have it to some degree. Insomnia was really rough the first week, but I made it. Just for the record, the insomnia goes way back. Wellbutrin just exaggerated it for a while. Now, the depression is gone and I have very little anxiety. The OCD is controllable. My memory and concentration are much improved, and sleep is a little easier to come by. I sleep in two 3-4 hour shifts. But hey, it's better than where I was a couple of months ago. And I keep improving. =) I have to deal with lower back pain now from all the weight I gained on ADs, expecially in the last three months. And my lack of movement from the back pain lately has caused severe edema in my feet and legs. But I can deal with that if I have my mind back.

 

Re: OCD or BP? simus

Posted by snapper on April 7, 2004, at 23:55:38

In reply to Re: OCD or BP? snapper, posted by simus on April 7, 2004, at 23:38:44

Simus, sound like the typical AD/benzo/weight gain/more health problems because of the original problem(s) dilema! It sucks! I was just telling my GP today that once your brain goes goofy, it seems inevitable that ill health will continue. I don't want to sound ultra negative but that is just how it seems!! Such a cascading effect - I want my brain back soooooooooo bad!! Glad you are doing better!!
snapper

 

Re: OCD or BP?katia snapper

Posted by katia on April 8, 2004, at 0:25:25

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?katia, posted by snapper on April 7, 2004, at 19:18:18

Hi Snapper,
Simple? Nope that's not the word for my med history. I've been doing a trial and error for almost two years now to get the right dx and then the rx. I think I may have it w/ this mix.
Keep in touch too. And yes, I am working.
Katia

 

Re: OCD or BP?katia

Posted by snapper on April 8, 2004, at 0:58:47

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?katia snapper, posted by katia on April 8, 2004, at 0:25:25

> Hi Snapper,
> Simple? Nope that's not the word for my med history. I've been doing a trial and error for almost two years now to get the right dx and then the rx. I think I may have it w/ this mix.
> Keep in touch too. And yes, I am working.
> Katia
Kati, I'm sorry If I made it sound as though the med protocol was a *nifty little mix*. Nothing about this Monster of an illness is simple. I really do hope for you that it is the right one!
I don't know If mentioned it to you or not but Today, thur the 8th is my last morn. to d/c Lamictal. I am hoping that I did'nt make a mistake by coming off of it (8) weeks because I think I really was getting some good mood lift from it and some motivation - however it was causing pretty bad upper back pain and a worsening of an already existing headache everyday
and some exacerbation of my already bad insomnia-
I see my doc next week and am going to throw out some ideas to him on possibly re-adding FXR to control my anxiety,panic and OCD-then possibly make another run with the Lam.
who knows ? time will tell. 2 yrs plus huh, I am sure you were most likely suffering emmensly for many years before finally being diagnosed and treated effectively,no?- I've been on this *crazy train for 14 yrs)!! Also just curious what would you say your major symptoms are or were that drove you mad and to get treatment!! I know thats a broad based question!
Just a general outline if you don't mind!!
thanks
snapper

 

Re: OCD or BP?katia snapper

Posted by katia on April 8, 2004, at 1:41:46

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?katia, posted by snapper on April 8, 2004, at 0:58:47

I see my doc next week and am going to throw out some ideas to him on possibly re-adding FXR to control my anxiety,panic and OCD-then possibly make another run with the Lam.
who knows ? time will tell. 2 yrs plus huh, I am sure you were most likely suffering emmensly for many years before finally being diagnosed and treated effectively,no?- I've been on this *crazy train for 14 yrs)!! Also just curious what would you say your major symptoms are or were that drove you mad and to get treatment!! I know thats a broad based question!
Just a general outline if you don't mind!!

Hi Snapper,
I'm flattered you're interested in hearing my story. Yes, you said it right - I suffered immensely for many many years, not knowing WHAT was wrong w/ me and hiding it away, even from myself (denial) and hiding it from others (shame) but not understanding any of it.

I'm 33 and only almost two years ago (summer of 01) did I seek treatment for depression. I do have a long story,but I'll try and be short b/c I'm tired! The first depression I can remember was when I was 11 - it was awful - questioning religion and the meaning of life. I went wild at 14 - went from a straight A student to the biggest rebel in the school. I think I experienced my first real manic/hypomanic episode when I was 17. I thought I'd just found the key to life mentally - life was my oyster and all that - I was out of control and high. Then I crashed into a real distinct depression six months later and didn't really come out since - other than the cycling of up and down - mainly mixed stuff. Depression being a BIG part of my history - all various degrees of it. I've had such a cyclical history in dealing w/ certain life circumstances coorelating w/ my highs and lows that I always assumed that it was circumstantial and not my mood swings. I've travelled all over the world - running away from it and also in "hypomanic" urges gets me to another country another job another love affair/boyfriend and always a crash.
Anyway, to try and be succinct, enough was enough about 6 years ago I got back into the country and started doing a lot of self-help stuff/therapy mediation, yoga, etc. healing herbs, energectic healings etc. hoping to find relief from my "demons" not understanding what I was going thru'. So enough of trying ALL there was to try short of a medical dx and meds, I ended up in another country w/ another boyfriend after giving up a job, my grad school, my place of living and had a big crash. BIG CRASH of an ending w/ him. Long long story, but I was a raving lunatic total mixed states severely depressed - wild. It was the worst time for me that summer. I came back from abroad and stayed at a friend's house during the breakup and pregnancy, which ended. I crawled around on the floor at all hours of the night howling, sobbing, scratching myself, not sleeping. I felt trully insane. And I still didn't get it that i was depressed. Many friends told me to get on ADs; which I eventually did. another story in itself. But something finally clicked in my brain that I needed help and I could find it. It's been like a second life to see my life thru' this different lens. Mind you, I spent an awful year on ADs that sent me spiralling hypomanic and zombie-like depressed. It wasn't working for me, finally I was dxed as BPII/Mixed and have been trying various MS since July.
That actually was the short version!
take care!
KAtia
p.s. what's your story?

 

Re: OCD or BP?katia

Posted by snapper on April 8, 2004, at 2:00:13

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?katia snapper, posted by katia on April 8, 2004, at 1:41:46

Katia, I'll fill ya in tommorrow . I am tired too and I feel a greatly needed good nights sleep comin on!!
till then,cool dreams to ya!
snapper

 

Re: OCD or BP?

Posted by Minnie-Haha on April 11, 2004, at 17:25:50

In reply to Re: OCD or BP? jdgjdg, posted by katia on April 5, 2004, at 23:38:37

> For me it's more about noise. I feel caged and induces anxiety when I'm stuck listening to unpleasant sounds. or a wierd one is when people jitter or shake their legs. it's been murder being a student. I'm surrounded by people shaking their legs during class. I can't explain it, but it drives me insane. I remember the first time it bothered me when I was 11 in a classroom and a big boy next to me shook his leg sooo fast all the time it drove me mad.

Here's something to throw in the mix. Have you considered that you might be simply hyper-sensitive to some forms of sensory input? This heightened state of awareness is called being "hypervigilant" and it is related to Sensory Integration Disorder (or DSI). Are you gifted? There is also a lot of what is called "overexcitabilty" in the gifted. Finally, do yo have an attention disorder? That is, are you easily distracted by things that others can tune out?

These are all similar and perhaps inter-related and maybe easy to mistake one for the other or have more than one. I have been learning about them over the past year or two because my son has some developmental problems -- and he's gifted -- and it's really made me stop and look at what I THOUGHT was "wrong" with me. I've changed my attitude about what is normal and abnormal and about (the subjectivity of) DXs!

 

Re: OCD or BP?

Posted by snapper on April 11, 2004, at 21:29:50

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?, posted by Minnie-Haha on April 11, 2004, at 17:25:50

> > For me it's more about noise. I feel caged and induces anxiety when I'm stuck listening to unpleasant sounds. or a wierd one is when people jitter or shake their legs. it's been murder being a student. I'm surrounded by people shaking their legs during class. I can't explain it, but it drives me insane. I remember the first time it bothered me when I was 11 in a classroom and a big boy next to me shook his leg sooo fast all the time it drove me mad.
>
> Here's something to throw in the mix. Have you considered that you might be simply hyper-sensitive to some forms of sensory input? This heightened state of awareness is called being "hypervigilant" and it is related to Sensory Integration Disorder (or DSI). Are you gifted? There is also a lot of what is called "overexcitabilty" in the gifted. Finally, do yo have an attention disorder? That is, are you easily distracted by things that others can tune out?
>
> These are all similar and perhaps inter-related and maybe easy to mistake one for the other or have more than one. I have been learning about them over the past year or two because my son has some developmental problems -- and he's gifted -- and it's really made me stop and look at what I THOUGHT was "wrong" with me. I've changed my attitude about what is normal and abnormal and about (the subjectivity of) DXs!
>

Hi, Minnie, thanks for your post and reply....Until dpression and severe anxiety hit me hard , I was 'gifted' in some areas of my life-the hypervigilant thing for me is not just a component of being hyper-aware of my surroundings-rather the opposite ..I am hyper-vigilant because of the anxiety and depression and some possible PTSD- my experiences of being hyper aware and hyper- vigililant are VERY painful in a physical way. Loud telephones the shrill of a dog's bark -sometimes a gentle voice from the other room is enought to make me want to jump out of my skin!!
Maybe you and your son also experience these unpleasantries as well but for me at least, it is enough to not want to even go out in public---Grocery stores, flouresecent(sp) lighting, people talking all at once...It is very well likely that I do have some sensory intergration problems and some attentional deficiencies etc. I do know that when my depression and anxiety improve, these smptoms usually also improve, but I am not sure to what degree. Right now I am minimally medicated and probably will need to go on something again to help all the 'crossed wires in my brain'. I sometimes feel like "Rainman" -even though I am not autistic nor do I have any other developmental difficulties, sometimes I think that the severity of my depression, and anxiety -accentuate my hyper-excitable states! Right now and for the last year or so, at least-my brain feels like "one giant mental scream"! lol - ooucch!!
snapper

 

Re: OCD or BP? Minnie-Haha

Posted by simus on April 11, 2004, at 22:44:17

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?, posted by Minnie-Haha on April 11, 2004, at 17:25:50

Thanks for the insight. I never knew that.

 

Re: OCD or BP? Minnie-Haha

Posted by katia on April 12, 2004, at 5:41:31

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?, posted by Minnie-Haha on April 11, 2004, at 17:25:50

Hi Minnie,
When you asked "are you gifted?" What do you mean by that??
Thanks for so much input. must go nightey nightey now.
Katia

> Here's something to throw in the mix. Have you considered that you might be simply hyper-sensitive to some forms of sensory input? This heightened state of awareness is called being "hypervigilant" and it is related to Sensory Integration Disorder (or DSI). Are you gifted? There is also a lot of what is called "overexcitabilty" in the gifted. Finally, do yo have an attention disorder? That is, are you easily distracted by things that others can tune out?
>
> These are all similar and perhaps inter-related and maybe easy to mistake one for the other or have more than one. I have been learning about them over the past year or two because my son has some developmental problems -- and he's gifted -- and it's really made me stop and look at what I THOUGHT was "wrong" with me. I've changed my attitude about what is normal and abnormal and about (the subjectivity of) DXs!
>

 

Re: OCD or BP?

Posted by Minnie-Haha on April 12, 2004, at 11:51:46

In reply to Re: OCD or BP? Minnie-Haha, posted by katia on April 12, 2004, at 5:41:31

> Hi Minnie,
> When you asked "are you gifted?" What do you mean by that??
> Thanks for so much input. must go nightey nightey now.
> Katia

Well, there are several definitions of gifted, but the simplest one for this discussion is: Is your IQ one or more standard deviations above normal? (Normal is 100 and every 15 points above or below is one standard deviation.) For ONE article on "overexcitability" in the gifted go to http://www.sengifted.org/articles_social/Lind_OverexcitabilityAndTheGifted.shtml

As for DSI (Sensory Integration Disorder or Dysfunction), most of the info out there is about kids, but kids with DSI grow up to be adults with DSI, regardless of what kinds of coping skills they learn.

 

Sensory Integration Disorder - relief???

Posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 0:42:49

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?, posted by Minnie-Haha on April 11, 2004, at 17:25:50

Hi anyone who has input on the subject!

Minnie HaHA, has your son been dxed w/ anything? Is there any cure for SID? I think that's what I suffer from. It's so wierd and insane; it's hard to put into words. I just get completely overwhelmed by sensory input; clocks, dogs, snoring, TV, not so nice music; visual input, legs moving/shaking when someone is sitting drives me bonkers BONKERS. I feel caged, trapped, angry and overwhelmed, anxious and extremely stressed and tense. ALL FROM SOMEONE WIGGLING THEIR FOOT!! Has anyone heard of anything so bizarre? It's hell being me. HELL.
Any input would be great (as long as it's not sensory!);-).
Katia

> > For me it's more about noise. I feel caged and induces anxiety when I'm stuck listening to unpleasant sounds. or a wierd one is when people jitter or shake their legs. it's been murder being a student. I'm surrounded by people shaking their legs during class. I can't explain it, but it drives me insane. I remember the first time it bothered me when I was 11 in a classroom and a big boy next to me shook his leg sooo fast all the time it drove me mad.
>
> Here's something to throw in the mix. Have you considered that you might be simply hyper-sensitive to some forms of sensory input? This heightened state of awareness is called being "hypervigilant" and it is related to Sensory Integration Disorder (or DSI). Are you gifted? There is also a lot of what is called "overexcitabilty" in the gifted. Finally, do yo have an attention disorder? That is, are you easily distracted by things that others can tune out?
>
> These are all similar and perhaps inter-related and maybe easy to mistake one for the other or have more than one. I have been learning about them over the past year or two because my son has some developmental problems -- and he's gifted -- and it's really made me stop and look at what I THOUGHT was "wrong" with me. I've changed my attitude about what is normal and abnormal and about (the subjectivity of) DXs!
>

 

SID p.s.

Posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 0:45:17

In reply to Re: OCD or BP?, posted by Minnie-Haha on April 11, 2004, at 17:25:50

Minnie,
In response to your questions; I haven't been dxed as ADD and I've never had an IQ test. I have been dxed as BPII and I'm 33. All the info out there about SID is about children. And yes, this definitely started for me as a child; but has been relentless ever since.

Katia

> > For me it's more about noise. I feel caged and induces anxiety when I'm stuck listening to unpleasant sounds. or a wierd one is when people jitter or shake their legs. it's been murder being a student. I'm surrounded by people shaking their legs during class. I can't explain it, but it drives me insane. I remember the first time it bothered me when I was 11 in a classroom and a big boy next to me shook his leg sooo fast all the time it drove me mad.
>
> Here's something to throw in the mix. Have you considered that you might be simply hyper-sensitive to some forms of sensory input? This heightened state of awareness is called being "hypervigilant" and it is related to Sensory Integration Disorder (or DSI). Are you gifted? There is also a lot of what is called "overexcitabilty" in the gifted. Finally, do yo have an attention disorder? That is, are you easily distracted by things that others can tune out?
>
> These are all similar and perhaps inter-related and maybe easy to mistake one for the other or have more than one. I have been learning about them over the past year or two because my son has some developmental problems -- and he's gifted -- and it's really made me stop and look at what I THOUGHT was "wrong" with me. I've changed my attitude about what is normal and abnormal and about (the subjectivity of) DXs!
>

 

Re: SID p.s.

Posted by Pfinstegg on April 18, 2004, at 12:17:53

In reply to SID p.s., posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 0:45:17

My son was diagnosed with sensory integration disorder when he was 7; his symptoms sound a lot like yours. Among the many things we did was to go to an occupational therapist who specialized in treating that; we also learned a lot of the exercises and did them at home. His nervous system has really matured, and he doesn't have any of the symptoms any more- he seems comfortable now even with a lot of sensory input. By the way, he's a physics grad student, and gifted.

 

Sensory Input Disorder Pfinstegg

Posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 14:50:27

In reply to Re: SID p.s., posted by Pfinstegg on April 18, 2004, at 12:17:53

Hi,
What sort of exercises? Is there any medication out there too, in conjunction? It's good to catch it at 7; I imagine that the exercises would work. I'm 33 and have been tormented all my life by this - whatever "this" is. Sounds like SID. I just can't imagine exercises would reverse or heal this. It feels too ingrained. I don't really have insurance, so to go to an OT sounds very expensive. How long does the treatment last and how accurate are the diagnostic tools? Do psychiatrists deal w/ this at all?
Thanks-
Katia

 

Re: SID p.s. Pfinstegg

Posted by simus on April 18, 2004, at 14:57:41

In reply to Re: SID p.s., posted by Pfinstegg on April 18, 2004, at 12:17:53

What kind of exercises???

> My son was diagnosed with sensory integration disorder when he was 7; his symptoms sound a lot like yours. Among the many things we did was to go to an occupational therapist who specialized in treating that; we also learned a lot of the exercises and did them at home. His nervous system has really matured, and he doesn't have any of the symptoms any more- he seems comfortable now even with a lot of sensory input. By the way, he's a physics grad student, and gifted.

 

Sensory Input Disorder p.s. again Pfinstegg

Posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 15:01:06

In reply to Re: SID p.s., posted by Pfinstegg on April 18, 2004, at 12:17:53

Hi again,
So how were you able to detect his "problem". My mom bought me a white noise machine to drown out TV noises at the age of 12. And beyond that, everyone just thought my behavior and intolerance were neurotic and difficult. No one seemed to question whether something deeper was going on. Noises and wiggling feet drove/drive me mad. But also at the same time (around 11), I remember my first depression - very existential - questioning religion and life, etc. w/ great sadness and fear. My first phobias came up (fear of spiders, losing my hair, and of cancer). I was terrified all the time. Again, no one seemed to think about outside help as a possibility; they just tried to talk w/ me about my fears. But all these things seem to happen w/in a year or two of each other. So I've always hidden these wierd "neurosis" as best as I could b/c they are so embarrassing. It's been hell trying to not let myself be bothered and go to extremes to get away from the input when I've lived w/ boyfriends; while hiding it. They've thought I'm neurotic, uptight, and let little things bother me. I haven't been able to explain it to anyone, even my pdoc! Be/c it's hard to describe. What do you do w/ this wierdness? Now, it seems there is a reason for it. But during my last two years journey into getting a dx finally for bipolar/depression, I assumed these "neuroses" would go away w/ the depression and anxiety. It feels really related; but they haven't. They are exacerbated by the lows or agitations for sure.

Any input anyone can give would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you,
Katia

 

Re: SID p.s. simus

Posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 15:02:16

In reply to Re: SID p.s. Pfinstegg, posted by simus on April 18, 2004, at 14:57:41

Simus,
Do you suffer from this? If so, what have been your experiences? I'm just realizing this could be something I"m dealing w/. In other words, what I've been dealing w/ has a name.
Katia

 

Re: SID p.s. Pfinstegg

Posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 15:10:03

In reply to Re: SID p.s., posted by Pfinstegg on April 18, 2004, at 12:17:53

Sorry, one more thing. Did ALL input bother him OR just some? I'm bothered by a TV that is on that I'm not watching, but watching it doesn't bother me, along as it's not too loud. Commercials I can't tolerate. Bad noises, like car stereos of other cars bother me, not my own. But I play nice music! It feels like an invansion from the outside - like I don't feel safe. I go into this fight or flight terror. Nice noises, like birds and water flowing, wind blowing, I live for. So it's not all noises; just alarming intrusive ones.
Does that sound about right?
Katia

 

Re: SID p.s. katia

Posted by simus on April 18, 2004, at 19:53:01

In reply to Re: SID p.s. simus, posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 15:02:16

> Do you suffer from this? If so, what have been your experiences?

Katia,

Read my posts on this thread on April 6. They explain my experiences.

Simus

 

Re: SID p.s. Pfinstegg

Posted by simus on April 18, 2004, at 19:55:17

In reply to Re: SID p.s., posted by Pfinstegg on April 18, 2004, at 12:17:53

> My son was diagnosed with sensory integration disorder when he was 7;

I was just wondering, did your son have colic as a baby?

 

Re: Sensory Integration

Posted by Pfinstegg on April 18, 2004, at 20:51:15

In reply to Re: SID p.s. Pfinstegg, posted by katia on April 18, 2004, at 15:10:03

I'm sorry that I don't remember all the exercises (my son is 28 now). At home, we did things like balancing on a very large ball, and exercises which were done on a trampoline which involved changing very quickly from using one hemisphere to the other. The occupational therapist did much more sophisticated exercises when he was with her.

We used a therapist trained by Jean Ayers, who is the foiunder of sensory integration therapy. It's now done a lot more with adults than it was when my son was doing it. I do think it is worth looking into, no matter what your age, At the time we did it, our health insurance largely paid for it, although that would probably not be the case now


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