Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 1295

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Re: can't stop the music

Posted by Penelope on August 10, 2003, at 19:27:08

In reply to Re: can't stop the music, posted by Penelope on August 10, 2003, at 18:05:36

Paranormal?

I don't see that anyone in this thread has speculated about the paranormal aspects of this *affliction*, but it was actually my first thought. Hearing music that no one else hears really sounds schizo to me, and I was unable to believe I had departed that far from reality, mental and spiritual depression notwithstanding. The only other explanation seemed to be that I was being visited by a spirit or that I had somehow accidentally tuned into another plane. With that thought in mind, I offer you another aside, FWIW.

I had a very dear friend, Wayne. He and his wife Virginia and my husband and I were very close along with another friend, Harold. My husband died in April 2000. Harold died about a year later in April 2001. Virginia died a year after that, in April 2002. Wayne and I, being the only survivors of our group, became especially close through all this, and in fact he moved into the guest apartment behind my house after his wife died. There was never a romantic connection, but we were about as close as two fraternal friends can be. Wayne died suddenly and unexpectedly on Jan. 12 of this year. He died in the apartment behind my house, apparently a heart attack.

Wayne had an electric organ/keyboard in this apartment, and the only type of music he ever played was church music. Nothing fancy, just a few chords, and he would sometimes sing along with it. He was very active in the music program at his church, singing in the choir and sometimes performing solos, and he frequently attended gospel music concerts, sometimes driving as far as 350 miles away to hear a group he especially loved. I did not particularly share his attraction to this type of music, although I, too, used to sing in the choir (different church), and I never went with him. Since I play the piano, he wanted me to share the organ with him, and he at one time put it in my living room, but I later insisted he take it to his apartment since I never played it.

We have some other friends who knew us all, and on hearing of my recent auditory affliction have decided that Wayne is attempting to contact me through his favorite medium--Christian church music. It is notable that Wayne had a very deep pitched singing voice--similar to the singer I am hearing, but Wayne's voice was not quite so low and not quite so professional.

So....one could put a paranormal twist on all this, but then a psychiatrist could have a hey day with it, too, huh?

BTW: My own husband, whom I adored and miss terribly, had little interest in church and even less in church music. I also miss Wayne terribly. I didn't realize while he was alive how much his friendship and help was supporting me in my bereavement from my husband. I now am very ..... unsupported.

 

Re: can't stop the music

Posted by Kacy on August 11, 2003, at 12:43:52

In reply to Re: can't stop the music, posted by Penelope on August 10, 2003, at 19:27:08

Penelope: I'm sorry for all your losses. That's a lot to handle, especially by yourself.

I really can't be sure of when I first heard music. For all I can remember, I first heard it in my twenties. Certainly depression started at least by then, although I didn't get treatment for a long, long time. I never conceived of it.

I started Effexor about two years ago. I am Adhd. Problems caused by that are probably the root of the depression. I have taken Strattera since March. I took Ritalin for nine months before then.

I can't remember hearing the music since I started Strattera, but that is not unusual. It comes and goes. I have heard it since I began Effexor.

Maybe your creative and musically-educated mind is adding to the music. Just the way you describe music shows that you know a lot about it. Maybe that's a natural way for people like yourself and for musicians to go.

I'm not musical and I don't add anything to it. I don't hear it like I'm listening to a great sound system, either. It's not that clear. Not surprisingly, it's about the quality of the radios of my youth.

 

Re: can't stop the music

Posted by Penelope on August 11, 2003, at 18:08:53

In reply to Re: can't stop the music, posted by Kacy on August 11, 2003, at 12:43:52

I was trying to learn something about ear anatomy today and found this intriguing passage, which I must share with all of you:

<Our ability to discriminate two close frequencies is actually much better than one would predict just from the mechanics of the basilar membrane. One theory to explain the mystery is that the outer hair cells help to "sharpen the tuning". Outer hair cells can actually move (change length) in response to nerve stimulation. If they could push the basilar membrane up and down, they could amplify or damp vibrations at will, making the inner hair cells more or less responsive. (Just like you can push a child higher and higher on a swing or bring her to a halt - it's all in when you push.) An interesting philosophical question here is, if the outer hair cells can move the basilar membrane, can that in turn move the oval window? And the stapes? And the eardrum? Can the ear, in fact, work in reverse and become a speaker? You may laugh, but there has been at least one case in the history of medicine of a patient complaining of persistent whispering in her ear. She was dismissed as crazy, until one obliging doctor finally put his stethoscope to her ear and listened. He could hear the whispering too. You can draw your own moral from this story.


However, most cases of tinnitus (a persistent ringing, whistling, or roaring in the ears) are not audible to the examiner. Little is known about the phenomenon, which is unfortunate because it can be very distressing to the sufferer.>

Funny that I found this today. Last night I was thinking: If this really is coming from my mind, then I must draw the seemingly nonsensical conclusion that I must be broadcasting as well as receiving, because I am totally convinced that I HEAR this music. It isn't something going through my mind like OCD's experience. It has direction, and I can feel the vibration of the bass notes, and I get goose bumps when the trumpet hits those high notes. I think that trumpet could shatter a crystal glass if I could turn the volume up. Also, I can completely cover it up with anything that is louder than *it* is, and *it* is not loud at all. Right now I have a Net radio station on, and I can only hear *it* in the brief moments between selections. If this were truly just a thought process, would it not intrude my mind even with other music playing?

Something else I haven't mentioned: I can sing along with it. I can sing counter to the melody and HEAR both parts as I sing. And usually my tempo is a little too slow, and they get ahead of me and I can HEAR that I am lagging and know when to step it up. I'm not much of a scientist, but this seems to prove to me that I really am...........HEARING it.


 

Re: can't stop the music Penelope

Posted by BlueShirtGirl on September 7, 2003, at 22:50:48

In reply to Re: can't stop the music, posted by Penelope on August 11, 2003, at 18:08:53

Hello, I was reading a book called "The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat - and other clinical tales" by Oliver Sacks, and I think you would be interested in reading Chapter 15, on page 125 entiltled Reminiscence which is on "hearing music in the head" - If you all haven't already read about it. I was interested in it because my mom and I have both hear "music in our heads" on occasion. Let me know what you think. C.

 

Re: double double quotes BlueShirtGirl

Posted by Dr. Bob on September 7, 2003, at 23:42:51

In reply to Re: can't stop the music Penelope, posted by BlueShirtGirl on September 7, 2003, at 22:50:48

> Hello, I was reading a book called "The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat - and other clinical tales" by Oliver Sacks...

I'd just like to plug the double double quotes feature at this site:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#amazon

The first time anyone refers to a book without using this option, I post this to try to make sure he or she at least knows about it. It's just an option, though, and doesn't *have* to be used. If people *choose* not to use it, I'd be interested why not, but I'd like that redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020918/msgs/7717.html

Thanks!

Bob

 

Re: double double quotes

Posted by linkadge on September 9, 2003, at 10:13:04

In reply to Re: double double quotes BlueShirtGirl, posted by Dr. Bob on September 7, 2003, at 23:42:51

I almost always have music in my head.

Linkadge

 

Re: can't stop the music

Posted by Penelope on October 26, 2003, at 17:58:55

In reply to Re: can't stop the music, posted by Penelope on August 11, 2003, at 18:08:53

UPDATE: Since I last posted I have started seeing a neurologist, and I wanted to share what I have learned.

Musical auditory hallucinations, this doc insists, are most definitly NOT a form of tinnitus. They are a form of hallucination and could be the symptom of a serious mental or neurological disorder which must be explored. And unlike tinnitus, which is considered incurable, he believes this can be cured or controlled if one can find and address the etiology.

He says the condition is extremely rare, and those who suffer this symptom fall within five groups, which I list here in order of frequency of occurence:

1. The profoundly deaf.

2. The psychotic.

3. Those with brain lesions, usually of the temporal lobe.

4. Those with severe depression.

5. Unknown etiology. EXTREMELY RARE.

I underwent various tests to rule out hearing impairment, insanity, and brain lesions. That puts me in group 4 or 5. Among those who experience auditory hallucinations and who are severely depressed, almost all are male. I am female. Also, this neurologist does not believe I am severely depressed. He says severe depression is when you are almost nonfunctioning. I am still functioning, although not on all cylinders, to be sure.

He does not think that the amitriptylene I am taking has anything to do with the hallucinations I am experiencing. On the contrary, he wanted me to double up. Although I am taking amitrip for pain, its most common usage is as an antidepressant. I balked at doubling up on the amitrip because it sometimes makes me sleepy and confused, so he put me on Paxil, 25 mg/day. That was about 2 months ago.

The music is fading out. Don't know whether it's coincidence or the Paxil, but I have a lot more control over my musicians now. If they play something I don't like or if they get caught in one of those irritating loops, I can usually make them play something more to my liking. On the other hand, they are adding almost daily to their repertoire. This music was never loud, but there were times when it had amazing clarity. For the most part, there is now little clarity except when they add something new. A couple weeks ago I was startled out of concentration on a mental task by the brilliant trumpet fanfare from the William Tell Overture (yes, the theme from The Lone Ranger). I laughed out loud. They never cease to amaze me.

Other additions are "Brahms Lullaby"' "Alouetta", "Unchained Melody", and "House of the Rising Sun", but faintly now---usually. It's about like hearing a radio from an adjoining room. I can tell what is playing, but I can't always make out the instruments or the words, if there is singing. Also, the music is not constant now as it was before. Sometimes it doesn't start until a couple hours after I arise, and it completely fades out from time to time during the day.

I encourage any of you who suffer this symptomatology to see a qualified neurologist. By qualified I mean someone who is familiar with auditory hallucinations and who will not give a knee-jerk dx of OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder), epilepsy or tinnitus. Try not to act weird, either, lest you fall into Group 2. Be prepared to count backward by 7's and do know what day it is. (I didn't!) This guy seemed to be very up on the condition, but that might be because my family doc called to talk to him about it before I went in.

Well, I am far from cured. Yesterday my group added "Them Bones" to their play list. Yes--"leg bone connected to the ankle bone, ankle bone conntected to the..." But I do feel in much better control. Did I tell y'all about Little Drummer Boy? Well, that would be the subject of a whole different post. :)

Hang in there--I am.
Pen

 

Re: can't stop the music

Posted by sadmom on October 27, 2003, at 11:52:52

In reply to Re: can't stop the music, posted by Penelope on October 26, 2003, at 17:58:55

I am partially deaf. I always hear the last song I heard on the radio, over and over in my head. It has something to do with the brain trying to compensate with not being able to hear.

 

music in my head

Posted by gigikay on March 9, 2004, at 17:38:47

In reply to Re: can't stop the music Penelope, posted by BlueShirtGirl on September 7, 2003, at 22:50:48

funny that i happened on this board because i thought i was alone...

so here's the deal. i CONSTANTLY hear music but ONLY IN MY HEAD. it isn't audible or anything, but i hear it all day long. most of the time it is just one line of a song. lately it has been the theme song of whatever game i am playing on the game boy...

anyhow, i have suffered from depression for many years, ADD, anxiety, post-traumatic stress, etc. i have tried many meds and am currently taking Lamictil (mood stabilizer), Celexa (anti-depressant) and Concerta for ADD. none of these help the music go away.

i have been thinking about it and i have come to this conclusion... if the music stops, then i start awfulizing about death or something completely ridiculous. i think my mind is constantly moving so that i don't go insane. like when i am driving, i calculate milage and minutes and such so that i don't constantly stare at a ditch and see the funeral of my kids. i guess what i am saying is this is my own defense mechanism.

any thoughts?
gigi

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by Dee C on March 9, 2004, at 20:18:35

In reply to music in my head, posted by gigikay on March 9, 2004, at 17:38:47

For me when I'm really stressed out, I hear lots of music in my head. For the most part its music, songs I heard years ago that replay over & over. I find them comforting because its like a defense mech for me. I have also suffered from major/severe depression for many years with an underlying ocd (thought ruminations, i think its been labeled). I was on Zoloft for many years and the pdoc switch me to Lexapro.

 

Re: music in my head gigikay

Posted by PoohBear on March 10, 2004, at 16:14:47

In reply to music in my head, posted by gigikay on March 9, 2004, at 17:38:47

> funny that i happened on this board because i thought i was alone...
>
> so here's the deal. i CONSTANTLY hear music but ONLY IN MY HEAD. it isn't audible or anything, but i hear it all day long. most of the time it is just one line of a song. lately it has been the theme song of whatever game i am playing on the game boy...
>
> anyhow, i have suffered from depression for many years, ADD, anxiety, post-traumatic stress, etc. i have tried many meds and am currently taking Lamictil (mood stabilizer), Celexa (anti-depressant) and Concerta for ADD. none of these help the music go away.
>
> i have been thinking about it and i have come to this conclusion... if the music stops, then i start awfulizing about death or something completely ridiculous. i think my mind is constantly moving so that i don't go insane. like when i am driving, i calculate milage and minutes and such so that i don't constantly stare at a ditch and see the funeral of my kids. i guess what i am saying is this is my own defense mechanism.
>
> any thoughts?
> gigi


Yeah, I used to have this problem also, especially when I would lay down to sleep. Here's a poem I wrote about it:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20040102/msgs/306852.html

It's called "ruminating". It stopped for me when I began taking Effexor for depression. Effexor has enabled me for the first time in as long as I care to remember to control my thoughts and not be plagued by a constant barrage of uncontrolled thoughts.

Tony

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by KathrynLex on March 10, 2004, at 18:37:08

In reply to Re: music in my head gigikay, posted by PoohBear on March 10, 2004, at 16:14:47

Hi Gigi,

I'd never heard of this problem until I started taking Lexapro. After starting on Lex I began to repeat song lyrics in my head all the time.

K.

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by socialdeviantjeff on March 10, 2004, at 20:18:02

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by KathrynLex on March 10, 2004, at 18:37:08

I've been doing this for over 12 years. It began, I think, as a way of alleviating boredom atschool. Since it started, I can't stop it. I do wonder what the difference is between ruminating and hallucenating with this type of thing.

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by Mr. Scott on March 12, 2004, at 10:31:16

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by socialdeviantjeff on March 10, 2004, at 20:18:02

I know this music well. I have it too unless something more noxious like a relationship break-up is occupying that space or some other anxiety.

What works best for me to shut it down is Trileptal or Depakote. Depakote works a little better, but Trileptal has far fewer side effects.

Scott

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by thinkfast on March 13, 2004, at 6:07:04

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by socialdeviantjeff on March 10, 2004, at 20:18:02

I have the same problem, if you can call it that...it seems to be a form of self-stimulation, but there is a problem stopping it for certain...I end up having to throw in a cd to forget about it. I have ruminating ocd, so i guess listening to the music could be a compulsion??? Don't know about anyone else, but all of the music that runs through my head somehow relates to what I'm thinking about. I've read about this condition in a couple of ADD books, and OCD books....

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by gigikay on March 13, 2004, at 9:00:29

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by thinkfast on March 13, 2004, at 6:07:04

i was trying to think about how long this has been happening, but i really can't recall. i remember when "beauty and the beast" came out on video, i used to fall asleep as i visualized the movie and the music. that was how many years ago? 10?

anyhow, i think that there is a pattern... i tend to awfulize about things. death mostly. the death of my family (mainly children)... maybe the music is a way to drown out the bad thoughts. i "die" everytime i drive because i visualize getting into an accident, but the thoughts don't stop with just the accident. i can picture tragedy. so to combat that i also count road mileage, calculate distance, whatever. i do have a little obsession with numbers.

these behaviors just provide a barrier to the other really bad thoughts so i guess it is somewhat of a defense mechanism.

any thoughts?

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by florence on March 13, 2004, at 15:33:22

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by gigikay on March 13, 2004, at 9:00:29

I take Provigil (stimulant) to counter the sedating effects of remeron and I am POSITIVE it is the stimulating effect of Provigil that plays the music over and over and over. I have no control over what the song will be..It can occur upon waking up in the morning. It helps me to take Xanax (anxiety med) to curb the anxiety I get from Provigil. I never had anxiety problems and it took me a long time to figure out that when the Provigil peaked-about 4-5 hrs after taking it, my mood would plummet and I would cry for no reason! TV Commercials drove me especially crazy;like zoom zoom! I felt brainwashed to the max.! Perhaps something like Xanax would help you.

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by chriscat on March 23, 2004, at 8:11:24

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by florence on March 13, 2004, at 15:33:22

This is the first time I've searched the internet for this. I've heard the music since I moved into this house, which was when I was recovering from renal failure. Lately, it has gotten clearer with distinct voices and yes I can feel the bass. Most of my songs are also Christian hymns and Civil War era songs (I am a 19th Century historian so some--not all--of the songs are familiar.) I will "try to confuse them" by singing (in my head) the wrong verse of the Battle Hymn of the Republic, but they sing the right verse. I was happy to speculate it might be ghosts since my house is 160 years old and locals think it is "haunted" OR my new Blood Pressure meds which include beta blockers and Clonodine, also used for ADD, since more recently the music is more insistent and distinct. Also Toprol--that can cause mild depression. BUT I'm also profoundly deaf. 90% Last night was the first time I started hearing it with my hearing aids in.

 

music, eh? Dr. Bob please validate this chriscat

Posted by kp2sushi on March 23, 2004, at 18:26:16

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by chriscat on March 23, 2004, at 8:11:24

In the course of my research as a psychology student, I have read of several cases of auditory hallucinations in non-psychotic patients.

An inexperienced psychiatrist might be quick to diagnose you with a psychotic disorder, as the DSM IV-TR's criteria for Schizophrenia leaves "bizarre delusions and hallucinations" up to the discretion of the psychiatrist.

A possible diagnosis is Temporal Lobe Epilepsy. This can only be diagnosed with an EEG. The treatment for TLE is often anticovulsants.

Beta-blockers and/or clonodine are not known to induce such phenomena. They act on adregenic receptors in the peripheral nervous system. Actually, scratch that. Propanolol (a beta-blocker) , and a few others, are non-discrimating on the receptors which they antagonize. As to clonodine, I believe it also has activity in the CNS... actually, I'm almost certain that it does.

In fact, beta-blockers and clonidine are known to reduce seizure activity (I just looked this bit up), so why the voices would be more distinct after administration, if you do in fact have TLE, is anybody's guess.

My "professional" recommendation is that you see a Psychiatrist/Neurologist for further review.

 

music - friend or foe?

Posted by gigikay on March 23, 2004, at 20:38:58

In reply to music, eh? Dr. Bob please validate this chriscat, posted by kp2sushi on March 23, 2004, at 18:26:16

i see a psychiatrist, but i have never mentioned this particular problem because i thought i was just imagining things. i didn't know that so many people are having the same experience.

i am currently taking an anti-convulsive (Lamictil) as well as Concerta and Celexa. i firmly believe that in my case the music is drowning everything else out... i have terrible thoughts and visions of my family dying (or myself) or seeing a person walking down the street and imagining them falling in front of my car or forgetting one of my children at home... i guess the thoughts aren't necessarily about death all the time, but once my mind starts going i can't stop it. i suppose it has a lot to do with anxiety. does anyone else awfulize to the extent that i do? i don't hallucinate, but it's pretty darn close.

i would rather hear the music than see my nightmares, but i don't want to do either.

here is a list of meds i have taken or am taking:
wellbutrin
prozac
celexa
lexapro
concerta
strattera
xanax
valium
alprazolam (all of the "am" meds (diazepam...)
lamictil
ambien
trazidone

i really can't think of anymore, but i know there is more to that list.

so my question... with my current mental ailments (i don't want to sound dramatic); major depression, bipolar II (that's a new one) anxiety, OCD... are there any combinations of meds that anyone can suggest?

i hope i don't sound like a total wacko.

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by harryp on March 23, 2004, at 23:42:58

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by chriscat on March 23, 2004, at 8:11:24

This is remarkable. Do you hear the music with the hearing aids out? Is there any chance the hearing aids are picking up a radio station?

If not, this sounds like a neurological problem. I certainly don't know enough to guess if your drugs could be playing a role. I'd make an appointment with a good neurologist.

 

Re: music in my head

Posted by chriscat on March 24, 2004, at 6:25:18

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by harryp on March 23, 2004, at 23:42:58

I hear the music almost exclusively at night with my hearing aids out. I don't hear it anywhere but home and it is mostly 19th or early 20th century music--except last night I heard Exodus, perhaps because we were talking about the assassination of the Hamas leader in Israel last night. But sometimes I don't know the song, although there's the possibility that I might have "heard" it and not internalized it. It's obviously entirely subjective and suggestive. I wonder if I would hear it in other 19th century houses since it might be a concidence of suggestive factors. I have also been having waking illusions in tyhe night some of which are quite amusing like my beagle (who sleeps on the bed) rising on her hind legs and doing pirouettes in a tutu. These started when Clonodine was added to Toprol, Diltiazem, and Vasotec. These are starting to fade as I get used to the drugs.

 

Re: music in my head chriscat

Posted by PoohBear on March 24, 2004, at 10:56:01

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by chriscat on March 24, 2004, at 6:25:18

This is called rumination... I used to do this as well. The music is generated by memories in your mind. The thing that stopped this for me was Effexor. Knocked it dead in it's tracks. I no longer have the anxious, obsessive thoughts I used to have and I can "turn the music off" if I so desire.

Tony

> I hear the music almost exclusively at night with my hearing aids out. I don't hear it anywhere but home and it is mostly 19th or early 20th century music--except last night I heard Exodus, perhaps because we were talking about the assassination of the Hamas leader in Israel last night. But sometimes I don't know the song, although there's the possibility that I might have "heard" it and not internalized it. It's obviously entirely subjective and suggestive. I wonder if I would hear it in other 19th century houses since it might be a concidence of suggestive factors. I have also been having waking illusions in tyhe night some of which are quite amusing like my beagle (who sleeps on the bed) rising on her hind legs and doing pirouettes in a tutu. These started when Clonodine was added to Toprol, Diltiazem, and Vasotec. These are starting to fade as I get used to the drugs.

 

Re: music in my head PoohBear

Posted by Sad Panda on March 25, 2004, at 8:14:12

In reply to Re: music in my head chriscat, posted by PoohBear on March 24, 2004, at 10:56:01

> This is called rumination... I used to do this as well. The music is generated by memories in your mind. The thing that stopped this for me was Effexor. Knocked it dead in it's tracks. I no longer have the anxious, obsessive thoughts I used to have and I can "turn the music off" if I so desire.
>
> Tony
>


Hi Tony,

Interestingly I had no music in my head while I was depressed. With Effexor I now have what I would call I normal amount if there is such a thing as normal. :) If I have a song in my head that I want to get rid of all I have to do it play it once or twice. I wish I knew how to turn it on as sometimes my tinnitus gets very boring to listen to when there is no sound around.

Cheers,
Panda.

 

Re: music in heads: mine just has spoken word...

Posted by aminated on March 26, 2004, at 0:05:24

In reply to Re: music in my head, posted by chriscat on March 24, 2004, at 6:25:18

Lots of interesting info in this string re: my auditory hallucinations. I haven't talked to many other people (real or otherwise) who've had this problem. My voices (I don't think i've ever heard music) have much in common with the hallucinations of music i've been reading about. Sometimes they are so insistent and loud that I can't squeeze in my own thoughts, and thus cannot really function at all (or sleep, even multiple consecutive nights).
The good news is that after about three years of taking Risperdal (only when I really needed it, not daily; I took it daily at first and had a few fine cases of akathisia -- I'm also a little averse to ingesting neurotoxins generally) I am much less affected by the hallucinations (they are not cammand hallucinations -- they are of other people, usually talking about me, but never TO me). I am manic-depressive and have "lost" (10 or 11 years ago) my manias entirely, unless the voices are a mixed state. I have no other symptoms of mania, only of depression in degrees varying from time to time. As I progressively lowered the amount of risperdal I ingested over time (more than two years), the voices became less insistent (easier to function through) and finally came to occur much less often. I don't attribute the decline of the hallucinations to the reduction (essentially elimination) of risperdal, but risperdal was not necessary in order to rid my mind of the really painfully boring chatter that occupied my conciousness for much of the past few years. My pdoc considers that, whatever produced the voices in the first place, I may have by now finally "learned" to ignore them, usually with the help of outside noise such as radio or music, enough to not be hearing them most of the time. I think it also shares some characteristics with the neurological phenomenon of 'kindling' in which a neurological pathway is or pathways are repeatedly triggered, and thus reinforce themselves -- make themselves more easily-triggered, and thus more commonly-ocurring.
There are lots of things about my voices I find interesting, like the multitude of "characters" (voices) my mind generates, and the ideas, even the language it generates, unbidden, things I've never thought or heard. Only most of it is dead boring, and that's sometimes seemed like the hell of it all -- I have a vivid imagination, can write a story, etc. Why must my damned hallucinations be so tedious?
I guess that's different than music after all.


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