![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 12 of 12. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 1:50:51
I somehow doubt that I'm the first to go through the kind of experience that I'm about to describe, so I thought I'd try posting about it.
By nature I'm one of those socially anxious people who, in spite of having an optimistic nature, am particularly prone to stress. Once that stress kicks in, I am debilitated by feelings or depression and paranoia - particularly in the workplace. How have I coped in the past? Meds and, more importantly, alcohol.
Up until I started a new job 3 weeks ago I was doing really well. I had been off ADs for four months, taking Xanax only a couple of times a week, usually on the night before a job interview. Most importantly, I had cut down my alcohol consumption from 1.5 litres of wine a night to one or two middies of beer. This strategy worked just fine while I was working from home. The problem was that I couldn't survive on the casual income and was forced to go out and join the rest of the world. Now I'm back to where I started.
A week after starting the new job I started on Celexa and increased my Xanax dosage, with incredible results. But then, stupidly, on New Year's Eve I spent the night with my ex-boyfriend, a couple of bottles of champagne, and some very potent hydroponic pot. For the entire night I rediscovered the euphoria that alcohol had given me in the early days, before it started to lose its effect in my life. My brain was working with incredible speed and I had these amazing moments of clarity. Now I know what mania feels like! Of course I felt like complete **** when I returned to work on Jan 2nd.
Stupidly, I have continued to drink at higher levels again. I have not been drinking so much - maybe 3 or 4 middies a night - but the stress of the job has completely killed my appetite. The result? I am living my life on a cocktail of alcohol, Celexa, Xanax, a little food, and 4 cups of coffee a day. I have lost 4kg in the last couple of weeks from stress! (For obvious reasons, this girl needs an upper in order to function!)This week my mood swings have been incredible. I am social, confident and clear thinking one day and am depressed and anxious the next. Yesterday my brain completely shut down. I then had a horrible panic attack and went home, explaining that I felt nauseous and dizzy. Obviously i can't continue doing this if I want to keep my job. Up until I have been working very, very hard - but my intray is piled so high that I get overwhelmed and feel that I can't get my head around anything. Add to this the noise and pressure in the office and I become counterproductive.
I take complete responsibility for this mess and know that I need to clean myself up again if I want to get through. But underneath I am terrified: What if I can't handle the stress of the job? What if the raw me, without drugs, can never learn to handle the real world out there? Most importantly, if I completely can the alcohol and pot from my life, will the Celexa and Xanax start working again - or have I somehow short circuited their paths? (This may be a crazy question, but I actually have a fear that this may be the case.)
I want a normal life. I want to be able to continue enjoying my musical education and to enjoy healthy, normal relationships. But once I've struggled through my 10 hour day and taken my meds,it's all that I can do to crawl in to bed on time by 8.30pm so that I can cope with the next day. I take four hour naps on Saturday and Sunday and do not know whether this is the result of a physical problem, nervous exhaustion, or the meds and alcohol.
Sorry to rant. I know that I have asked a lot of questions and that I may not be making any sense. But if anyone could shed any light on any of the issues above, I'd be immensely grateful. :-)
Believe it or not, I never get suicidal. The optimist in me just refuses to give in. But I do get scared occasionally. And this is one of those times.
Alara
Posted by jesus on January 11, 2003, at 2:04:48
In reply to Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 1:50:51
supposedly xanax alone should be enough to wipe out your anxiety completely...I know this is hard to believe but it's likely that this anxiety (or at least a great deal of it) is from pot. Like i said in a recent post..pot is really notorious for causing anxiety, especially that of a hydroponic nature. I remembered when i chronically abused hydroponic pot i was so paranoid I thought my face was caving just because i had a single blemish (no joke)...it may seem sedative when you toke up, but in the long term...thats another story
Posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 2:43:32
In reply to Re: Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by jesus on January 11, 2003, at 2:04:48
Jesus, I think you are right. I smoke pot very infrequently but have noticed that I seem chronically anxious and even paranoid for weeks afterwards. And to think that some people regard it as an anxiolytic! Can you tell me for how long this negative effect lasts after a binge?BTW, my ex-boyfriend abuses hydro pot every day and he gets the same way about blemishes on his face.
Posted by jesus on January 11, 2003, at 2:55:17
In reply to Re: Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails » jesus , posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 2:43:32
>Can you tell me for how long this negative effect lasts after a binge?
It's all dependent on how much you smoke, potency of the pot, your tolerance, ect. ect...
From personal experiance, it lasted a month for me when i went cold turkey, and I smoked ALOT for about half a year...
But anyways, a proved way to get it out of your system in faster time is to drink alot of water, and do anything that involves alot of sweating (spending time in the sauna, jogging, ect). do this and the negetive effects will subsist in no time
Posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 3:00:05
In reply to Re: Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by jesus on January 11, 2003, at 2:55:17
Posted by jesus on January 11, 2003, at 3:07:08
In reply to Re: Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by jesus on January 11, 2003, at 2:55:17
Posted by glenn on January 11, 2003, at 8:27:36
In reply to Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 1:50:51
Hi Alara,
I do have some understanding of your situation and how horrible it is. I have been there a couple of times. I am also on celexa and xanax, though the xanax is now only very occasionally instead of 2-3 times a week and it has been the best combo for me along with a few additions.
My last experience of dope was 10 years ago when it gave me a week long awful anxiety spell, like a panic attack without any physical symptoms.
I can also get this from too much alcohol so I haven't taken either for 10 years.
It sounds to me like you know what you need to do and there is no reason I know of that the celexa or xanax wont work again, neither have reputations as poopers and if they worked for you before the chances are they will again.
So what if you need the celexa and xanax for a while, diabetics need their insulin, anaemics their iron, if you want to stop taking them after you have stabilised you can try lifestyle changes
and yes cut out the pot!
I now meditate and exercise daily, take a vitamin b supplement and a very good mineral supplement and am only on 20mg celexa. I have virtually cut out xanax and zopiclone and stopped inderal.
This has taken months though and the celexa has helped me do it.
I also always carry a xanax with me, the reassurance it gives me is very helpful, so much so that I haven't had one for 2 months, but I still carry one!
You do sound like you know what needs to be done and what will help, the fears about the job/meds are I think part of the anxiety, I used to go and check that all cigarettes I had smoked were definitely out 2-3 times as I feared starting an inferno. I never did of course but fear ain't logical as I'm sure you know.
Hope you don't think I'm preaching but sometimes certain other people are not good for us, my ex for example, not necessarily through any deliberate action of theirs , however I leave that for you to ponder.
If I can make it beleive me you can alara.Best wishes
glenn
Posted by Noa on January 11, 2003, at 8:53:41
In reply to Re: Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by glenn on January 11, 2003, at 8:27:36
Are you in therapy? It seems the stress is a factor, and maybe therapy could help. Also, to sort out why the alcohol dependence, etc.
Posted by Pfinstegg on January 11, 2003, at 11:53:36
In reply to Re: Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by glenn on January 11, 2003, at 8:27:36
Wow, Glenn! I have been really curious as to how you are doing- and now I know! I am so impressed with the healthy gains you have made, and also with how you have made them- using modest amounts of medication (and less as you have been improving), lots of exercise, and intelligent life choices. It's so good to hear this!
Pfinstegg
Posted by Mr.Scott on January 11, 2003, at 20:11:53
In reply to Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 1:50:51
"Most importantly, if I completely can the alcohol and pot from my life, will the Celexa and Xanax start working again - or have I somehow short circuited their paths? (This may be a crazy question, but I actually have a fear that this may be the case.)"
Not that I've been able to completely ditch the booze or anything, but my advice is to do so while you still can with relative ease. I personally find that after my once in a while boozing sessions I have 1)either deactivated the meds or 2)introduced a lowered tolerance to stress most likely from alcohol withdrawal of some kind (alchol withdrawal even from minor doses is pro-convulsant).
The less variables the better. And no I doubt you have ruined the meds effect forever. I would consider mulling over a bipolar spectrum type of diagnosis however if all the bouncing around continues.
Posted by bampf on January 11, 2003, at 22:10:32
In reply to Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 1:50:51
My god how your post resembled my life at the moment! It made me feel like I'm not alone. I hope you find a happy medium to work with.
Posted by JohnL on January 12, 2003, at 17:15:14
In reply to Stress, Drug Dependence and Dangerous Cocktails, posted by Alara on January 11, 2003, at 1:50:51
Cut down on the alcohol, and take Zyprexa instead of Xanax. You'll be fine. It acts as antidepressant, antimania, and mood stabilizer all at the same time.
> I somehow doubt that I'm the first to go through the kind of experience that I'm about to describe, so I thought I'd try posting about it.
>
> By nature I'm one of those socially anxious people who, in spite of having an optimistic nature, am particularly prone to stress. Once that stress kicks in, I am debilitated by feelings or depression and paranoia - particularly in the workplace. How have I coped in the past? Meds and, more importantly, alcohol.
>
> Up until I started a new job 3 weeks ago I was doing really well. I had been off ADs for four months, taking Xanax only a couple of times a week, usually on the night before a job interview. Most importantly, I had cut down my alcohol consumption from 1.5 litres of wine a night to one or two middies of beer. This strategy worked just fine while I was working from home. The problem was that I couldn't survive on the casual income and was forced to go out and join the rest of the world. Now I'm back to where I started.
>
> A week after starting the new job I started on Celexa and increased my Xanax dosage, with incredible results. But then, stupidly, on New Year's Eve I spent the night with my ex-boyfriend, a couple of bottles of champagne, and some very potent hydroponic pot. For the entire night I rediscovered the euphoria that alcohol had given me in the early days, before it started to lose its effect in my life. My brain was working with incredible speed and I had these amazing moments of clarity. Now I know what mania feels like! Of course I felt like complete **** when I returned to work on Jan 2nd.
> Stupidly, I have continued to drink at higher levels again. I have not been drinking so much - maybe 3 or 4 middies a night - but the stress of the job has completely killed my appetite. The result? I am living my life on a cocktail of alcohol, Celexa, Xanax, a little food, and 4 cups of coffee a day. I have lost 4kg in the last couple of weeks from stress! (For obvious reasons, this girl needs an upper in order to function!)
>
> This week my mood swings have been incredible. I am social, confident and clear thinking one day and am depressed and anxious the next. Yesterday my brain completely shut down. I then had a horrible panic attack and went home, explaining that I felt nauseous and dizzy. Obviously i can't continue doing this if I want to keep my job. Up until I have been working very, very hard - but my intray is piled so high that I get overwhelmed and feel that I can't get my head around anything. Add to this the noise and pressure in the office and I become counterproductive.
>
> I take complete responsibility for this mess and know that I need to clean myself up again if I want to get through. But underneath I am terrified: What if I can't handle the stress of the job? What if the raw me, without drugs, can never learn to handle the real world out there? Most importantly, if I completely can the alcohol and pot from my life, will the Celexa and Xanax start working again - or have I somehow short circuited their paths? (This may be a crazy question, but I actually have a fear that this may be the case.)
>
> I want a normal life. I want to be able to continue enjoying my musical education and to enjoy healthy, normal relationships. But once I've struggled through my 10 hour day and taken my meds,it's all that I can do to crawl in to bed on time by 8.30pm so that I can cope with the next day. I take four hour naps on Saturday and Sunday and do not know whether this is the result of a physical problem, nervous exhaustion, or the meds and alcohol.
>
> Sorry to rant. I know that I have asked a lot of questions and that I may not be making any sense. But if anyone could shed any light on any of the issues above, I'd be immensely grateful. :-)
>
> Believe it or not, I never get suicidal. The optimist in me just refuses to give in. But I do get scared occasionally. And this is one of those times.
>
> Alara
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Medication | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.