Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 10214

Shown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Off methamphetamine, on serzone

Posted by Dee on August 17, 1999, at 0:21:19

After three years off methamphetamine I stoped believing that the depression and anxiety will go away if I just stay off. Got on serzone, hasn't kicked in yet. Anyone been on this road? I had no choise but to get on something -- Anything... either that or meth, & I'm not ready to go back there as long as there is anything else I haven't tried.

 

Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone

Posted by Racer on August 17, 1999, at 13:22:58

In reply to Off methamphetamine, on serzone, posted by Dee on August 17, 1999, at 0:21:19

You missed a long thread about this last month. There are a couple of us here who have experienced this sort of thing.

I took enormous amounts of speed in my younger days, and finally found that I was medicating myself. It was hard as hell to get off that poison, but I did it, and have mostly stayed clean as a whistle for almost 16 years now. It's rough though and I know that if someone said, "hey, you want some?" I'd probably say "yeah, why not". It's great that you're trying to do the healthier thing, and treat what's really wrong.

One thing I know, but don't understand, is that the effects of speed on neurotransmitters is the same as the effects of certain types of depression and certain eating disorders. I think that even if you don't start out depressed on speed, it will eventually make you depressed by changing your brain chemistry. Since as I recall, the speed kicks in mostly as an increase of dopamine activity, you might talk to your doctor about trying a drug that is more specific to dopamine. Or not. That's up to you.

Anyway, the ADs take a while to kick in, so hang on to the thought that it's starting to get better. That usually gets me through the first couple of weeks. After that, if all goes well, you won't have to make that sort of bargain with yourself. You really will feel better.

This is a great place to get support, there's so much honesty here, no one's afraid to admit to being twisted, we all are in our own ways, or we wouldn't be here. Also, everyone here can extrapolate from our own pain, and so we all reach out to others with any help we can offer. That's the essence of humanity and community, so welcome.

 

Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone

Posted by Dee on August 18, 1999, at 11:59:01

In reply to Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone, posted by Racer on August 17, 1999, at 13:22:58

Thanx, Racer.
I quess my problem is that my addiction support group holds the view that I will automatically relapse on crystalmeth as soon as start medicating my feelings. To a point in my drug recovery I could see a point in this... However I am starting to see that there is a difference of being being depressed for using drugs and using drugs to selfmedicate depression and anxiety. I took this step alone, and many consider getting on serzone being back on drugs.
Well, as important as the suppot is, I can not let anyone make decisions for me when it concerns my well being -- I tried to be well informed for this, and I just hope everything will work out.
Thanx again.


 

Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone

Posted by Racer on August 18, 1999, at 12:15:25

In reply to Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone, posted by Dee on August 18, 1999, at 11:59:01

Good for you! The first thing that I learned after I got off drugs was that I needed to make decisions for myself, rather than letting other people or the drugs make the decisions for me. That's a hard lesson to learn, and it took me about 8 years to learn it! I still backslide, too, but it's finally getting through my rocklike head!

I'm so glad that you're taking care of yourself. The ADs don't mask your emotions, they normalize the chemistry in your brain. The meth just keeps you from feeling the pain that brought you to it. THere's a wide difference there. You might ask your recovery groups what they'd say if you were going on insulin to treat diabetes. In both cases, it's the same foundation: the drug normalizes your chemistry to treat a pathological state.

Insulin is a hormone, and it can effect your mood. Neurotransmitters are made of the same kinds of elements as insulin. The latest research on the brain shows that depression not only changes brain chemistry, it also changes the physical structure of the brain. The ADs normalize the neurotransmitters, and they help prevent the physical changes. That's not masking the feelings, is it? It's treating a physical disease.

Sorry, I get a little het up about that attitude. The Calvinist types in my family give me grief for it a lot, so I've gotten a little sensitive. Most of my family suffers from depression, but I'm the first to take ADs. My grandfather was treated for it, but not for long, because everyone looked down on him for it. It ruined his life. I WILL NOT go that route. I WILL do what I can to make my life better.

I'm glad to have your company on my journey.

 

Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone

Posted by Dee on August 20, 1999, at 11:22:36

In reply to Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone, posted by Racer on August 18, 1999, at 12:15:25

Checking out the pages from the past I found out most what I needed to know. Most importantly, I realize that I don't need to be alone about anything any more. When I got my first anxiety attacks at age of seven I didn't have ways to express what I was feeling. I stayed home from school for what I thought was stomach hurt & was consequently being punished for lying & told that there is nothing wrong with me until I believed it myself. It took thirty years of hiding, being ashamed, thinking I was crazy and knowing of no help, gulping down whatever streetdrug that came my way untilo the pain became so overwhelming that I could no longer deny it. I'm on day five, and it'll be a while before I will feel any effects of the medication, but just the fact that I can without shame and hiding allow myself to feel the way I am feeling enables me to handle those feelings better.
I've got one more question. This site seems to focus mainly on medication, I am wondering if anyone knows of a site where we dicuss additional ways that we may benefit from.. such as diet, excercise, setting up a daily routine (sometimes works for me when I am moderately depressed..)


 

Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone

Posted by Racer on August 20, 1999, at 12:40:17

In reply to Re: Off methamphetamine, on serzone, posted by Dee on August 20, 1999, at 11:22:36

There are tons of boards that offer that sort of thing, and this one does offer that sort of thing, too. Ask any question, and someone will answer.

For now, I'll go look at my links, and try to find some places for you.

I'm glad you don't feel so alone now, and that you know that you can say goodbye to the shame. That's the worst part of this, isn't it?

Sending good thoughts your way!


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