Psycho-Babble Medication Thread 7079

Shown: posts 1 to 16 of 16. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?

Posted by racer on June 5, 1999, at 16:42:14

I'm taking Effexor XR, 150 per day. I've been taking Effexor XR since January, but the dosages have been raised over this time period. The latest increase was about two weeks ago. I'm still suicidal. I just don't have the hope or motivation to go on anymore. I don't see anything at all to look forward to.

I know what I'll do. I have a bottle of acepromazine for my horse. It's a mild sedative for horses, but you have to wear gloves to mix it, since it's so toxic to humans. I'm scared that it's gonna make me sick and miserable for a long time, which has kept me from doing it so far, but I'm also scared that I'm going to do it and then all chance of anything changing will be gone. I really need help that just isn't there for me, and don't know who to turn to.

Can anyone help? Here's the question, same as it's been for the last year: is there a drug that will be effective against my depression without a ton of side effects that I can't tolerate? My blood pressure is too low for the tricyclics. Not a chance in hell I'll try an MAOI, gotta have my sour cream. Serzone was totally intolerable, all my muscles tensed and I couldn't keep any food down. Paxil made me gain over fifty pounds, and I slept all the time, just couldn't feel awake. Wellbutrin is out, because of anorexia. Therapy, alas, is also out. No money, no insurance. My doctor is terrible, but she's the only one available to me under my circumstances.

Please, tell me there's hope, and help me find it. I just can't stand another minute of this. I'm 35 years old, and still stop eating at the first sign of stress! I'm sick to death of always being hungry, of never being safe and loved. Please help me.

 

Re: Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?

Posted by Elizabeth on June 5, 1999, at 17:36:51

In reply to Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?, posted by racer on June 5, 1999, at 16:42:14

Hi Racer.

Some people need much higher doses of Effexor than that, and I think raising it would be worthwhile. However, you really need to deal with your immediate suicidality, and I think you know that horse tranquilizers are not the answer. Is there someone where you are who you can talk to? If not, I would seriously consider checking into a hospital.

BTW it might interest you to know that sour cream is perfectly fine to eat with a MAOI. Actually there are ways around most of the problems you listed with various meds - so there are possibilities, even if the Effexor doesn't turn out to be the thing.

I hope things get better for you soon. Take care.

(((((((((Racer)))))))))

 

Re: Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?

Posted by Donna on June 5, 1999, at 18:14:49

In reply to Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?, posted by racer on June 5, 1999, at 16:42:14

Hi Racer.

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. I have had the same feeling many times. I have been on lots of medications that had bad side effects or were ineffective. Eventually you will find one to help. Taking an overdose is not the way out.

If you really feel suicidal and have no where to turn, please go to the nearest Emergency Room.

You say you have a horse. You must love him very much. Think about who would take care of him if you were not around. Surely, no one could give him the care and love you do.

Please tell your doctor, or someone else how you feel.

Take care,

Donna

 

Re: Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?

Posted by Ruth on June 5, 1999, at 20:21:42

In reply to Re: Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?, posted by Donna on June 5, 1999, at 18:14:49

Hi Racer-
I'm sorry you're feeling so hopeless. You're right to have questions about which AD to be taking and in what dose, but the immediate issue is your safety.
You need to find someone/ some place that will help you during this crisis so that you can tackle the issue of the right medication. There are many out there, and deciding which one is a combination of what side effects you're willing to deal with, and then finding one that works for you. Unfortunately this can be an involved process. But hopefully your doc can be a partner with you and help develop a plan.
Does your doctor know how hopeless you're feeling? Does anyone? For starters you need for someone to know. If you aren't then able to agree with that person that you will not take your life then you need to get yourself to the hospital. The depth of despair is agonizing, but there are ways of lessening that (through medication). Please give yourself a chance.>

Hi Racer.
>
> I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. I have had the same feeling many times. I have been on lots of medications that had bad side effects or were ineffective. Eventually you will find one to help. Taking an overdose is not the way out.
>
> If you really feel suicidal and have no where to turn, please go to the nearest Emergency Room.
>
> You say you have a horse. You must love him very much. Think about who would take care of him if you were not around. Surely, no one could give him the care and love you do.
>
> Please tell your doctor, or someone else how you feel.
>
> Take care,
>
> Donna
>
>

 

Re: Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?

Posted by mila on June 6, 1999, at 2:45:39

In reply to Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?, posted by racer on June 5, 1999, at 16:42:14

Dear, DEAR Racer. I am so sorry that you have to be suffering this way. Please know that we are here for you. Please keep writing to let us know how you are doing. I do not know if words can help you when you are in the depth of despair, but let me say that simply by virtue of the suffering you have endured, you are enlightened and stronger then the average person. Indeed, it must take incredible endurance to go through what you are going through.
If you cannot stop the suicidal tendencies, perhaps you can ask your doctor to prescribe something stronger, such as an anti-psychotic like zyprexa or risperdal, as temporary treatment. These medications too have side effects so you may have to try a few before you find one that works best for you. But you may not have time for this. In that case, check into to a hospital and perhaps the doctor there can stabalize you. Remember, there are still many medications and combinations to try. For example you might try adding remeron to the effexor.
Please keep up your amazing strength and spirit.
And write to us. We are listening!

 

Clarification attempt

Posted by racer on June 6, 1999, at 5:32:47

In reply to Re: Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?, posted by mila on June 6, 1999, at 2:45:39

I don't know if I was clear... well, OK, that's a fib. I wasn't too clear on my question there. Let's try again.

For almost a year now, I've been in a severe and serious depression. The drugs that have been tried have not worked to date, though there has been some improvement in some ways. Since I keep going into crisis mode this way (always seems to hit around 11PM on Friday, wouldn't you know it!), I know that the improvement isn't nearly enough. For almost four weeks now, I've done little else besides sit and cry. I'm in terrible shape, and I know it.

So, here's the real question: because of my history of side effects, and because the doctor is ready to stop seeing me (county doctor, low budget, no insurance, the usual), when this comes up, she's been raising the dosage, rather than discussing a change in medication. I'm not too unhappy about this, because I am, after all, the one who would be having the side effects. Still, it would be nice to stop crying, at least long enough to rehydrate myself. You know what I mean?

As for the Effexor XR, it hasn't proven terribly anorgasmic, though I have no sex life at the moment; I haven't gained weight, though I've continued losing which is bad; it's been very effective against the anxiety that usually accompanies my depressions. And it feels as though it's doing its best for the depression. Maybe that's just the anxiety not being there, but I don't feel as crazed and actively miserable. On the other hand, I want to nap all the time, suddenly go into crying jags, can't sleep on a semi-regular basis (like now - second night in a row that I'm up at 3:30), and gee, want to kill myself to end the pain. What's really scary to me is that tonight I started thinking in terms of ten months of pain to this point, and that no matter how uncomfortable death was, it was probably not nearly as bad as those ten months have been. It's really only the fear of being sick and hurting from the poison that has kept me safe so far. I really don't want to start talking myself INTO suicide. I'm trying to talk myself OUT of it.

Does any of that make sense at all? I have a hard time explaining myself when I'm this tired. Thanks for listening.

 

Re: Clarification attempt

Posted by Elizabeth on June 6, 1999, at 8:06:55

In reply to Clarification attempt, posted by racer on June 6, 1999, at 5:32:47

(Hmm my previous post appeared twice. Damn. Well anyway....)

Racer, after hearing you describe your symptoms, I think that high-dose Effexor (300mg or more, perhaps) might actually be the right thing. There are other meds you can use, at least in the short term, to make things more tolerable: stimulants, benzos, antipsychotics, etc. are all fast-acting. (I think buprenorphine would probably help but I don't know if your doctor would be willing to try it.)

It must be really hard to have to worry about whether you're even going to be able to keep seeing your doctor. That can't be helping. If you can find someone to help you deal with it, it might be best to try to get this straightened out, maybe by applying for Medicaid or something like that.

Wishing you the best....

 

Suicidal. Reasons NOT to do it.

Posted by jwill on June 7, 1999, at 11:34:49

In reply to Re: Clarification attempt, posted by Elizabeth on June 6, 1999, at 8:06:55

>Racer, I really hope you can find the strength to pull through this difficult time in your life. I'm sure everyone does.; but I know that knowing that isn't, in and of itself, enough to make it easy. Some thoughts I had which I hope will allow you to get out of your depression are as follows: Certainly, the advice of other responders regarding going to an emergency room is correct. If it comes to a point at which you feel you might commit suicide, you've got to get yourself to an emergency room to save your life. Also, I note that you are unwilling to try MAOI's., and understand, but (I'm not an expert and not one with authority to tell you you should try them. Only you can make that decision), the reason you gave: "gotta have my sour cream", while it may have been facetious, is, I must say, not sufficient cause to avoid trying them if they might help. I don't mean to sound morbid, but it's simply true that you can't have sour cream is you're dead, either. Finally, keep in mind that you are fighting a powerful enemy - depression, meaning that it is not, in any way, your fault, and which also means that, when you do manage to beat the depression and anxiety (personally, I like to call it "mega-despair"), and survive, you will have achieved a tremendous, albeit necessary, victory. Hang in there! Good luck!

 

Re: Suicide...to be or not to be...

Posted by nancy on June 15, 1999, at 13:06:44

In reply to Suicidal. Change meds or increase dose?, posted by racer on June 5, 1999, at 16:42:14

the pain of depression and the anguish of a mixed state...there is hell on earth...been there and nearly died many times. tough to talk about. i'm not long out of where you're now at...no one should ever be in that place of agony.

what are you able to do, right now? can you make calls and appointments to get yourself on medicaid and/or medicare...is there someone there with you that can do these things for you? you'll need financial assistance to go the route of electro-convulsive therapy.

let's try to stay alive today...if it's just too much misery to bear any longer, there's tomarrow to consider ending it all.

if suicide is the only acceptable alternative, then don't make any mistakes...things could actually end up worse than they are right now. my personal preference is seroquel...new atypical antipsychotic, not quickly recognizable in an er, simply drift off into a peaceful deep eternal sleep, no pain, no sickness, no coming back...

nancy


> I'm taking Effexor XR, 150 per day. I've been taking Effexor XR since January, but the dosages have been raised over this time period. The latest increase was about two weeks ago. I'm still suicidal. I just don't have the hope or motivation to go on anymore. I don't see anything at all to look forward to.
>
> I know what I'll do. I have a bottle of acepromazine for my horse. It's a mild sedative for horses, but you have to wear gloves to mix it, since it's so toxic to humans. I'm scared that it's gonna make me sick and miserable for a long time, which has kept me from doing it so far, but I'm also scared that I'm going to do it and then all chance of anything changing will be gone. I really need help that just isn't there for me, and don't know who to turn to.
>
> Can anyone help? Here's the question, same as it's been for the last year: is there a drug that will be effective against my depression without a ton of side effects that I can't tolerate? My blood pressure is too low for the tricyclics. Not a chance in hell I'll try an MAOI, gotta have my sour cream. Serzone was totally intolerable, all my muscles tensed and I couldn't keep any food down. Paxil made me gain over fifty pounds, and I slept all the time, just couldn't feel awake. Wellbutrin is out, because of anorexia. Therapy, alas, is also out. No money, no insurance. My doctor is terrible, but she's the only one available to me under my circumstances.
>
> Please, tell me there's hope, and help me find it. I just can't stand another minute of this. I'm 35 years old, and still stop eating at the first sign of stress! I'm sick to death of always being hungry, of never being safe and loved. Please help me.

 

Re: Suicide...to be or not to be...

Posted by Annie on June 16, 1999, at 12:11:11

In reply to Re: Suicide...to be or not to be..., posted by nancy on June 15, 1999, at 13:06:44

> if suicide is the only acceptable alternative, then don't make any mistakes...things could actually end up worse than they are right now. my personal preference is seroquel...new atypical antipsychotic, not quickly recognizable in an er, simply drift off into a peaceful deep eternal sleep, no pain, no sickness, no coming back...
>

I've debated with myself whether to mention my discomfort with the preceding paragraph or to let it ride, hoping that ignoring it would be the smarter choice. Sorry, I can't let it pass. The rest of the post was supportive and understanding and I am sure that was the intent of this paragraph... however...I think the mention of specific methods of suicide in a forum frequented by severely depressed people, (especially in response to someone who is suicidal) is never a good idea. I know I stored that info in the back of my mind, even though I don't know how, unless allowing for re-incarnation, anyone could prove the peaceful/no pain hypothesis. I'm stable right now and I "filed for future use". Can you imagine what we could be doing by offering this type of information to someone who is very unstable and in great pain?

Annie


> > I'm taking Effexor XR, 150 per day. I've been taking Effexor XR since January, but the dosages have been raised over this time period. The latest increase was about two weeks ago. I'm still suicidal. I just don't have the hope or motivation to go on anymore. I don't see anything at all to look forward to.
> >
> > I know what I'll do. I have a bottle of acepromazine for my horse. It's a mild sedative for horses, but you have to wear gloves to mix it, since it's so toxic to humans. I'm scared that it's gonna make me sick and miserable for a long time, which has kept me from doing it so far, but I'm also scared that I'm going to do it and then all chance of anything changing will be gone. I really need help that just isn't there for me, and don't know who to turn to.
> >
> > Can anyone help? Here's the question, same as it's been for the last year: is there a drug that will be effective against my depression without a ton of side effects that I can't tolerate? My blood pressure is too low for the tricyclics. Not a chance in hell I'll try an MAOI, gotta have my sour cream. Serzone was totally intolerable, all my muscles tensed and I couldn't keep any food down. Paxil made me gain over fifty pounds, and I slept all the time, just couldn't feel awake. Wellbutrin is out, because of anorexia. Therapy, alas, is also out. No money, no insurance. My doctor is terrible, but she's the only one available to me under my circumstances.
> >
> > Please, tell me there's hope, and help me find it. I just can't stand another minute of this. I'm 35 years old, and still stop eating at the first sign of stress! I'm sick to death of always being hungry, of never being safe and loved. Please help me.

 

Dr. Bob, your input?

Posted by Victoria on June 16, 1999, at 15:17:19

In reply to Re: Suicide...to be or not to be..., posted by Annie on June 16, 1999, at 12:11:11

I agree with Annie. We ought to draw a line here and not do or say anything that allies us with the (potential or active) self-destructive feelings of anyone reading our posts. Does there need to be a guideline on this issue for the site?


> > if suicide is the only acceptable alternative, then don't make any mistakes...things could actually end up worse than they are right now. my personal preference is seroquel...new atypical antipsychotic, not quickly recognizable in an er, simply drift off into a peaceful deep eternal sleep, no pain, no sickness, no coming back...
> >
>
> I've debated with myself whether to mention my discomfort with the preceding paragraph or to let it ride, hoping that ignoring it would be the smarter choice. Sorry, I can't let it pass. The rest of the post was supportive and understanding and I am sure that was the intent of this paragraph... however...I think the mention of specific methods of suicide in a forum frequented by severely depressed people, (especially in response to someone who is suicidal) is never a good idea. I know I stored that info in the back of my mind, even though I don't know how, unless allowing for re-incarnation, anyone could prove the peaceful/no pain hypothesis. I'm stable right now and I "filed for future use". Can you imagine what we could be doing by offering this type of information to someone who is very unstable and in great pain?
>
> Annie
>
>
> > > I'm taking Effexor XR, 150 per day. I've been taking Effexor XR since January, but the dosages have been raised over this time period. The latest increase was about two weeks ago. I'm still suicidal. I just don't have the hope or motivation to go on anymore. I don't see anything at all to look forward to.
> > >
> > > I know what I'll do. I have a bottle of acepromazine for my horse. It's a mild sedative for horses, but you have to wear gloves to mix it, since it's so toxic to humans. I'm scared that it's gonna make me sick and miserable for a long time, which has kept me from doing it so far, but I'm also scared that I'm going to do it and then all chance of anything changing will be gone. I really need help that just isn't there for me, and don't know who to turn to.
> > >
> > > Can anyone help? Here's the question, same as it's been for the last year: is there a drug that will be effective against my depression without a ton of side effects that I can't tolerate? My blood pressure is too low for the tricyclics. Not a chance in hell I'll try an MAOI, gotta have my sour cream. Serzone was totally intolerable, all my muscles tensed and I couldn't keep any food down. Paxil made me gain over fifty pounds, and I slept all the time, just couldn't feel awake. Wellbutrin is out, because of anorexia. Therapy, alas, is also out. No money, no insurance. My doctor is terrible, but she's the only one available to me under my circumstances.
> > >
> > > Please, tell me there's hope, and help me find it. I just can't stand another minute of this. I'm 35 years old, and still stop eating at the first sign of stress! I'm sick to death of always being hungry, of never being safe and loved. Please help me.

 

Re: Dr. Bob, your input?

Posted by mary on June 17, 1999, at 19:40:20

In reply to Dr. Bob, your input?, posted by Victoria on June 16, 1999, at 15:17:19

Count me in with the last two responders. I look at this site as a safe haven to hear hope, share failures but get hope, vent my frustrations and maybe even help someone else. I never really wanted to know a sure-fire easy approach. Like Annie, I. too, pocketed that piece of information. Trazadone didn't work for me years ago and a bridge was definitely too complicated (believe it or not). There are days when I need to hear "get through this one minute". Then worry about the next. I don't need to spend that minute trying to figure out where to get seraquel. I suppose it would be impossible to monitor all posts but I would prefer to go to a Hemlock website myself rather than find it at a site where I hope to find a reason not to get rid of myself.
mary

> I agree with Annie. We ought to draw a line here and not do or say anything that allies us with the (potential or active) self-destructive feelings of anyone reading our posts. Does there need to be a guideline on this issue for the site?
>
>
> > > if suicide is the only acceptable alternative, then don't make any mistakes...things could actually end up worse than they are right now. my personal preference is seroquel...new atypical antipsychotic, not quickly recognizable in an er, simply drift off into a peaceful deep eternal sleep, no pain, no sickness, no coming back...
> > >
> >
> > I've debated with myself whether to mention my discomfort with the preceding paragraph or to let it ride, hoping that ignoring it would be the smarter choice. Sorry, I can't let it pass. The rest of the post was supportive and understanding and I am sure that was the intent of this paragraph... however...I think the mention of specific methods of suicide in a forum frequented by severely depressed people, (especially in response to someone who is suicidal) is never a good idea. I know I stored that info in the back of my mind, even though I don't know how, unless allowing for re-incarnation, anyone could prove the peaceful/no pain hypothesis. I'm stable right now and I "filed for future use". Can you imagine what we could be doing by offering this type of information to someone who is very unstable and in great pain?
> >
> > Annie
> >
> >
> > > > I'm taking Effexor XR, 150 per day. I've been taking Effexor XR since January, but the dosages have been raised over this time period. The latest increase was about two weeks ago. I'm still suicidal. I just don't have the hope or motivation to go on anymore. I don't see anything at all to look forward to.
> > > >
> > > > I know what I'll do. I have a bottle of acepromazine for my horse. It's a mild sedative for horses, but you have to wear gloves to mix it, since it's so toxic to humans. I'm scared that it's gonna make me sick and miserable for a long time, which has kept me from doing it so far, but I'm also scared that I'm going to do it and then all chance of anything changing will be gone. I really need help that just isn't there for me, and don't know who to turn to.
> > > >
> > > > Can anyone help? Here's the question, same as it's been for the last year: is there a drug that will be effective against my depression without a ton of side effects that I can't tolerate? My blood pressure is too low for the tricyclics. Not a chance in hell I'll try an MAOI, gotta have my sour cream. Serzone was totally intolerable, all my muscles tensed and I couldn't keep any food down. Paxil made me gain over fifty pounds, and I slept all the time, just couldn't feel awake. Wellbutrin is out, because of anorexia. Therapy, alas, is also out. No money, no insurance. My doctor is terrible, but she's the only one available to me under my circumstances.
> > > >
> > > > Please, tell me there's hope, and help me find it. I just can't stand another minute of this. I'm 35 years old, and still stop eating at the first sign of stress! I'm sick to death of always being hungry, of never being safe and loved. Please help me.

 

Re: input

Posted by Dr. Bob on June 18, 1999, at 5:03:06

In reply to Re: Dr. Bob, your input?, posted by mary on June 17, 1999, at 19:40:20

> I've debated with myself whether to mention my discomfort with the preceding paragraph or to let it ride, hoping that ignoring it would be the smarter choice. Sorry, I can't let it pass. The rest of the post was supportive and understanding and I am sure that was the intent of this paragraph... however...I think the mention of specific methods of suicide in a forum frequented by severely depressed people, (especially in response to someone who is suicidal) is never a good idea. I know I stored that info in the back of my mind, even though I don't know how, unless allowing for re-incarnation, anyone could prove the peaceful/no pain hypothesis. I'm stable right now and I "filed for future use". Can you imagine what we could be doing by offering this type of information to someone who is very unstable and in great pain?


> I agree with Annie. We ought to draw a line here and not do or say anything that allies us with the (potential or active) self-destructive feelings of anyone reading our posts. Does there need to be a guideline on this issue for the site?


> Count me in with the last two responders. I look at this site as a safe haven to hear hope, share failures but get hope, vent my frustrations and maybe even help someone else. I never really wanted to know a sure-fire easy approach. Like Annie, I. too, pocketed that piece of information. Trazadone didn't work for me years ago and a bridge was definitely too complicated (believe it or not). There are days when I need to hear "get through this one minute". Then worry about the next. I don't need to spend that minute trying to figure out where to get seraquel. I suppose it would be impossible to monitor all posts but I would prefer to go to a Hemlock website myself rather than find it at a site where I hope to find a reason not to get rid of myself.


First, I want to say that I very much appreciate the above comments, which I think are great examples of how much you care about each other. But this is a difficult issue.

I believe, in general, in not telling people what they should or shouldn't do. And that it's good for them to be able to say what's on their mind. There have been controversial posts before, and I've had to lay down the law (or, rather, to make up the law), but it wasn't easy for me.

OTOH, it's important to think about how you might affect others. To respond to Victoria's question, if I had to issue a guideline, I think that would be it: please think about how you might affect others. (And I am *not* saying that nancy didn't; on the contrary, hers struck me as a thoughtful post.)

OTOH, you can't always know how someone else is going to be affected. Different people react in different ways. For example, sometimes having something to "file for future use" is better than not having anything, and just because you have something filed doesn't mean you're going to use it.

People who are suicidal are going to think about doing it whether or not others bring it up. And, as mary says, information about "self-deliverance" is out there; we can't just pretend that it isn't.

Mentioning something, however, is of course very different than recommending it.

Like Annie, I also wonder about the peaceful/no pain hypothesis -- but don't know how we can know.

Finally, though the issue of how to respond to others is important, I'm also worried about racer and nancy.

Bob

 

Re: Dr. Bob, Stop the madness!!!

Posted by Tom on June 18, 1999, at 20:54:38

In reply to Re: Dr. Bob, your input?, posted by mary on June 17, 1999, at 19:40:20

Dr. Bob... this kind of post must not be posted. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. Freedom of speech doesn't apply here. That kind of post is too dangerous for all readers, suicidal or not. It seems like this web site needs a policeman for *dangerous* messages, meaning those that give direct messages on how to end it all.


> Count me in with the last two responders. I look at this site as a safe haven to hear hope, share failures but get hope, vent my frustrations and maybe even help someone else. I never really wanted to know a sure-fire easy approach. Like Annie, I. too, pocketed that piece of information. Trazadone didn't work for me years ago and a bridge was definitely too complicated (believe it or not). There are days when I need to hear "get through this one minute". Then worry about the next. I don't need to spend that minute trying to figure out where to get seraquel. I suppose it would be impossible to monitor all posts but I would prefer to go to a Hemlock website myself rather than find it at a site where I hope to find a reason not to get rid of myself.
> mary
>
> > I agree with Annie. We ought to draw a line here and not do or say anything that allies us with the (potential or active) self-destructive feelings of anyone reading our posts. Does there need to be a guideline on this issue for the site?
> >
> >
> > > > if suicide is the only acceptable alternative, then don't make any mistakes...things could actually end up worse than they are right now. my personal preference is seroquel...new atypical antipsychotic, not quickly recognizable in an er, simply drift off into a peaceful deep eternal sleep, no pain, no sickness, no coming back...
> > > >
> > >
> > > I've debated with myself whether to mention my discomfort with the preceding paragraph or to let it ride, hoping that ignoring it would be the smarter choice. Sorry, I can't let it pass. The rest of the post was supportive and understanding and I am sure that was the intent of this paragraph... however...I think the mention of specific methods of suicide in a forum frequented by severely depressed people, (especially in response to someone who is suicidal) is never a good idea. I know I stored that info in the back of my mind, even though I don't know how, unless allowing for re-incarnation, anyone could prove the peaceful/no pain hypothesis. I'm stable right now and I "filed for future use". Can you imagine what we could be doing by offering this type of information to someone who is very unstable and in great pain?
> > >
> > > Annie
> > >
> > >
> > > > > I'm taking Effexor XR, 150 per day. I've been taking Effexor XR since January, but the dosages have been raised over this time period. The latest increase was about two weeks ago. I'm still suicidal. I just don't have the hope or motivation to go on anymore. I don't see anything at all to look forward to.
> > > > >
> > > > > I know what I'll do. I have a bottle of acepromazine for my horse. It's a mild sedative for horses, but you have to wear gloves to mix it, since it's so toxic to humans. I'm scared that it's gonna make me sick and miserable for a long time, which has kept me from doing it so far, but I'm also scared that I'm going to do it and then all chance of anything changing will be gone. I really need help that just isn't there for me, and don't know who to turn to.
> > > > >
> > > > > Can anyone help? Here's the question, same as it's been for the last year: is there a drug that will be effective against my depression without a ton of side effects that I can't tolerate? My blood pressure is too low for the tricyclics. Not a chance in hell I'll try an MAOI, gotta have my sour cream. Serzone was totally intolerable, all my muscles tensed and I couldn't keep any food down. Paxil made me gain over fifty pounds, and I slept all the time, just couldn't feel awake. Wellbutrin is out, because of anorexia. Therapy, alas, is also out. No money, no insurance. My doctor is terrible, but she's the only one available to me under my circumstances.
> > > > >
> > > > > Please, tell me there's hope, and help me find it. I just can't stand another minute of this. I'm 35 years old, and still stop eating at the first sign of stress! I'm sick to death of always being hungry, of never being safe and loved. Please help me.

 

Re: Dr. Bob, Stop the madness!!!

Posted by Chris A. on June 21, 1999, at 3:28:25

In reply to Re: Dr. Bob, Stop the madness!!!, posted by Tom on June 18, 1999, at 20:54:38

I was going to file the Seroquel info for future use, but went to the PDR first. It doesn't look like it would be effective. If one became somnolent they'd most likely end up with a gastric lavage, activated charcoal and hospital bill. That just complicates life. Not exactly peaceful, eternal bliss. My sucide attempts have left me feeling traumatized - at my own hand, at that. It is a good way to be the victimizer in your own post-traumatic stress syndrome. Been there, done that; regularly consider doing it again. Will I ever learn??? The pain just often seems too much. Without God helping me I'd be dead, dead, dead. Then my family would be more traumatized, as well as the good doc who has been valiantly trying to help me the past four years. There is a reason we are all still here. There is hope (please remind when I am in the pit again and can't see out).

Chris A.

 

Re: Suicide...to be or not to be...

Posted by nancy on June 27, 1999, at 19:06:50

In reply to Re: Suicide...to be or not to be..., posted by Annie on June 16, 1999, at 12:11:11

a reasonable and helpful suggestion considering the author's distress was leading her to consider consumption of a toxic chemical. can YOU IMAGINE the possible consequences????

pain is the instigator of suicide...not the possibility of rethinking one's method of suicide.

not brain damaged or crippled from suicide attempt,
nancy

> > if suicide is the only acceptable alternative, then don't make any mistakes...things could actually end up worse than they are right now. my personal preference is seroquel...new atypical antipsychotic, not quickly recognizable in an er, simply drift off into a peaceful deep eternal sleep, no pain, no sickness, no coming back...
> >
>
> I've debated with myself whether to mention my discomfort with the preceding paragraph or to let it ride, hoping that ignoring it would be the smarter choice. Sorry, I can't let it pass. The rest of the post was supportive and understanding and I am sure that was the intent of this paragraph... however...I think the mention of specific methods of suicide in a forum frequented by severely depressed people, (especially in response to someone who is suicidal) is never a good idea. I know I stored that info in the back of my mind, even though I don't know how, unless allowing for re-incarnation, anyone could prove the peaceful/no pain hypothesis. I'm stable right now and I "filed for future use". Can you imagine what we could be doing by offering this type of information to someone who is very unstable and in great pain?
>
> Annie
>
>
> > > I'm taking Effexor XR, 150 per day. I've been taking Effexor XR since January, but the dosages have been raised over this time period. The latest increase was about two weeks ago. I'm still suicidal. I just don't have the hope or motivation to go on anymore. I don't see anything at all to look forward to.
> > >
> > > I know what I'll do. I have a bottle of acepromazine for my horse. It's a mild sedative for horses, but you have to wear gloves to mix it, since it's so toxic to humans. I'm scared that it's gonna make me sick and miserable for a long time, which has kept me from doing it so far, but I'm also scared that I'm going to do it and then all chance of anything changing will be gone. I really need help that just isn't there for me, and don't know who to turn to.
> > >
> > > Can anyone help? Here's the question, same as it's been for the last year: is there a drug that will be effective against my depression without a ton of side effects that I can't tolerate? My blood pressure is too low for the tricyclics. Not a chance in hell I'll try an MAOI, gotta have my sour cream. Serzone was totally intolerable, all my muscles tensed and I couldn't keep any food down. Paxil made me gain over fifty pounds, and I slept all the time, just couldn't feel awake. Wellbutrin is out, because of anorexia. Therapy, alas, is also out. No money, no insurance. My doctor is terrible, but she's the only one available to me under my circumstances.
> > >
> > > Please, tell me there's hope, and help me find it. I just can't stand another minute of this. I'm 35 years old, and still stop eating at the first sign of stress! I'm sick to death of always being hungry, of never being safe and loved. Please help me.


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