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Re: there's nothing here

Posted by alexandra_k on May 18, 2019, at 16:56:28

In reply to Re: there's nothing here, posted by alexandra_k on May 18, 2019, at 16:45:36

this year is (yet another year) of a complete and utter f*ck*ng waste of a life.

this entire year is me mostly waiting around for people to sign off on the work i've done.

of course i'm required to make changes. to justify it taking a whole year. i was given the first sentance of my thesis last meeting.

why thanks for writing the first sentance of my thesis for me! let me write that down and put that in there as my first sentance! it was so worth a year of my life for you to write the first sentance for me!

uh, did you get to paragraph 3 yet?

there is a talk about ex-phi this week...

hmm. last time i heard about ex-phi i just arrived in aussie. there was a conference on it because a couple people were on the job market... then i caught them the last year they were some place for a year in the US before they moved on to higher ranking institutions...

i guess it's the same old...

we get everything 20 years late.

rock bands and everything...

when everybody else all teh world over is over it. it comes here. some last ditch effort to extract everything out of it.

people don't come here with work in progress... they don't come here showcasing work that is about to come out in journals (so people can get cracking writing responses)... because people take 20+ years to get around to writing responses in these parts so it's f*ck*ng pointless. so... instead... people give old papers. stuff that's so f*ck*ng old the rest of the world wouldn't put up with them giving it.

that's how it feels.

so the stuff is polished. because it's super-old. because it's been given over and over and over and over and over to audiences everywhere else first.

a trouble with that is that it gives us a false view of the field, however.

it stifles development because people here don't appreciate it for that. it sets a very high bar on quality. then people are too scared to say anything. couple that with a supervisor / panelist who can't bring himself to read sentance number 2 until he believes sentance number 1 is perfect (written by himself) and...

people here talk to me horribly.

there is much 'i know you are but what am i' and 'nooooooo that's you' kinds of 'discussions' too. highly emotionally reactive and so on. the aim seems to be to get everything wound up to excitement... nonsense output... it's just horrible. a horrible way of interacting. no shared vision of what the aim is. horrible people.

i am so over it.

the university produced an excess of managers because pepole chased the money because people were sick of being poor.

i think it is about lack of access to resources growing up. many people then have issues about it. you don't need to work very hard to convince people in this country that life is a nasty struggle for you to have which means others will likely die of not having enough. its psychologically plausible to people. like our last prime minister. culture of bullies. paying it forwards... a nasty view of life, indeed. and their believing it makes it so...




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