Posted by rjlockhart37 on April 28, 2013, at 22:09:10
on the news feed I ran across my newphews on easter....and seeing my brother who right now im am so angry....I mean, all those years he was good to me where nice.....but now, its the now, not the past.....and just seeing those pictures of my newphews running around picking up easter eggs....its torchure....you know even if I called him back, him and his wife would never invite me to any of there functions, friends, maybe a Christmas party...and then want me to do work for them at the house....that's about it, im not an equal, I was always considered the dork, the other person of the family....quota....that's rj....he has issues, stay clear of him, well I've gotten that not only from them, the church, friends, it wasn't just them, many people did that to me till now. That's why i'm trying to redo my whole brain personality....transform....and never have that feeling of being a lowlife around others....
so.......i'm just gonna write this, from now on I am going to transform my body into toned, never chuncky again, into a desirable looking person, I already have some feature...but all this fat covers it up....chuncky monkey..i'm getting it off....no more sitting up nights in shame of my life, and all I've known of myself....a loser, an outcast, the dork, I hate it all, I want to change, and I am going to change, it may not happened fast....but this is already getting programmed into my mind to do something. Hiding behind a laptop book looking at all the things I wanted to be, Im sick and tired of it. So what I write here....I am going to do best to do it.
I will never be the outcast, dork, no one likes....again
not a scholar but understand distress
Med:
Prozac 60mg
Lamictal 200mg
Zyprexa 20mg
Nuvigil 250mg
encourage you to avoid false lights of enlightment and belief systems
poster:rjlockhart37
thread:1042839
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20130409/msgs/1042839.html