Posted by Dinah on October 8, 2009, at 4:44:24
In reply to Re: Bad day, senseless post » Dinah, posted by Tabitha on October 7, 2009, at 12:35:17
> So true. It's one of those things I get embarrassed to complain about, because it exposes the fact that I've been putting up with it for so long, and yet I still have no clear plan to make a change.
No reason to be embarrassed. A job is something that has so many layers upon layers of meaning and rewards.
My job is undoubtedly bad for my health. And I've gotten enough feedback from other employees who quit to know that my frustration with my bosses is not uniquely my own.
It's often frustrated me about myself that despite those facts, I cling to my job. I beat myself up over the fact that I preferred to stay someplace safe in familiarity, even when I saw the health consequences.
But each time I thought about quitting and didn't, I realized that it just wasn't that easy. There were benefits to my job that I might not find elsewhere, and not just monetary. If I thought about the monetary aspects, it would be even more complex. Like it or not, I've got obligations, and making sure I'm able to meet them *is* important.
In the end I've decided that I am making the conscious decision to stay at my job, at this moment. My decision may change in the future. With that decision, some of the feelings of being a trapped animal lessened. Maybe because I didn't feel as helpless. I was making the best decision for me among a range of decisions that were less than ideal. Which let me quit beating myself up a bit and start trying to just make the best of it, and figure out ways to mitigate some of the least healthy aspects of it.
I'm not sure I'm explaining it well. In some ways it's a subtle difference, but in some ways it isn't at all. Do you think it's at all possible to evaluate your future from this point on as if you were evaluating accepting a job offer? And if staying is actually the best decision for you, given the alternatives, make the choice to accept your current position? Of course your evaluation may also be that it isn't the right decision for you.
Argh. I really don't know if I'm explaining it well. And of course I'm not sure if others would find it as helpful as I did. And even as it is, I'm still finding that my job affects my health, and my health affects my ability to do my job.
It's complex. There's no need to be embarrassed to complain about it.
poster:Dinah
thread:920048
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20090930/msgs/920161.html