Psycho-Babble Social | for general support | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

Re: thanks » Kath

Posted by Larry Hoover on June 13, 2006, at 9:31:30

In reply to Re: thanks » pseudoname, posted by Kath on June 11, 2006, at 19:05:00

> If the others who were with you are decent people, they probably think BiL is a total jerk to say something like that OR that you know each other well enough to joke around & that you're not uncomfortable with it.
>
> I often think that other people often don't realize how uncomfortable we might be.

I betcha that BiL is so caught up in his own experience caused by his big mouth, he really doesn't sense anybody else's experience at all. By the time he gets around to doing that, everybody has their "no biggie" face on already. He really might not know how bad it feels for you. In you.

Or, he's doing something he fears doing. That's maybe why it happens. Tourette's has a variant like that. It's actually a sign of respect, but it gets all twisted up in the brain, and comes out inverted. The exact worst thing to say, rather than the best.

In either case, you gotta call him on his sh*t. It is his problem to sort out. He needs to make more effort. Or, at least, some compromise. And he needs to clearly hear what the problem is, to get there from here.

Lar

 

Thread

 

Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post


[656386]

Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.

 

Start a new thread

 
Google
dr-bob.org www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for
in

This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Social | Framed

poster:Larry Hoover thread:654253
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060611/msgs/656386.html