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Re: More bad news Dinah

Posted by gardenergirl on September 23, 2004, at 20:07:32

In reply to Re: More bad news, posted by Dinah on September 23, 2004, at 16:32:38

I'm so glad you made that appt. with the geriatric social worker. Hopefully he or she will be able to provide some valuable resources. In my city, there is the Council on Aging, which is kind of the gateway to many different agencies and programs for older adults. I'm so glad you will be getting access to help.

I didn't read the entire thread, so if this has already come up, I apologize. You know, you may want to consider letting Adult Protective Services or whatever the equivalent agency is in your area step in. They can do an assessment and make recommendations which might take some of the "blame" off of you. Perhaps your parents will still be very angry, but it might give you a buffer zone. Sometimes the rehab therapists can play this role of "bad guy" as well.

I imagine this must be so difficult on so very many levels. It is not easy at all to become and sustain being a caregiver for parents. The dynamics, even in emotionally healthy families are complex. It sounds like this is triggering for you, and who needs that? I know my time with my mom was "toxic", but I kept telling myself "that's what families do." But you know? Not all families do that. And you have to do what's best for you and your own family first.

Oh dinah, I wish I could somehow make this burden lighter. It's so sad and heavy at times. I hope you are able to find a few minutes or more each day for dinah time. You deserve it, and need it now more than ever.





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