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Re: Dear diary May 25 » Ilene

Posted by Angel Girl on May 26, 2004, at 9:10:40

In reply to Dear diary May 25, posted by Ilene on May 25, 2004, at 19:44:48

> This has gotten to be a boring diary, I think.
>
> I didn't feel so perky today. Noticed the anxiety in the afternoon before I took my second Klonopin. Feeling a little more depressed; thinking about my 50th birthday tomorrow. It just seems there is no upside to getting older. I looked around at all the older women in the grocery store today, and most of them were fat and ugly, and some of them were slow and frail. None of them were attractive. Maybe it's important to me to feel attractive because I feel like so much of my life was knocked out by depression.
>
> I also brood about my marriage. I keep thinking I should never have married my husband. It's a little late to be concerned about it now--we've been married for 19 years. I never enjoyed our sex life, for one thing.
>
> Oh, what excitement--locked myself and my daughter out of the car. Played with a cicada while we waited. Got stuck in traffic on the way home. Didn't make dinner.
>
> Also took my espresso machine in to be repaired. It might be gone for 3 whole weeks. What'll I do?


Happy Birthday Ilene

I hope you can find some joy in your birthday. I can so relate to your feeings. I feel the same. Life has passed me by because of this depression. So many years wasted and still suffering and getting older.

Hugs
Angel Girl

BTW - Try to do something nice for yourself.


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