Posted by Emme on May 11, 2004, at 22:20:17
In reply to Re: priceless quote from parent » Emme, posted by B2chica on May 11, 2004, at 15:36:49
>
> > Okay, so I was nice and went to see my mother for Mother's Day.
>
> the question here is did you do this for Her or for You?Well, both really. If I didn't go, I'd be packing my bags for a guilt trip. And if she didn't book a ticket, I'd book one for myself. Seriously, though, I hear you about looking after your own well being. In a way that's what I'm attempting to do. I try to space out and carefully choose short visits to preserve sanity. It's strategic. I don't live that far away, but I don't go that often. So selecting Mother's Day as one of the times I visit is logical, and there's no reason to expect it to be any more or less enjoyable than another time. (this visit wasn't bad, actually - there's always a priceless quote.)
> -just to give your mom a little break, even so close as 30 years ago, Mental illness was equated with institutions.
Yeah, I know... I actually don't blame her for generating stigma and I know her opinions were pretty common for her generation. She does have a tendency to gossip a lot about other people, though, and can be pretty judgmental. And that's a great way to inject attitudes into kids.
> See how easy that is? you only have to beat people over the head with a big stick inorder for them to have acceptance and nonjudgment??
> :)Too bad that's the way it always is, huh? Too bad the term "mental illness" conjures up images of a serial killer. Now I've got a cartoon image in my head of a serial killer whapping an intolerant person over the head. :)
> Don't feel bad about this, i think we've all been there, mostly due to the stigma that was passed down to us. But ask yourself, before you had the label did you think of yourself as "defective"? or just unwell, sad, confused and maybe different? Don't let a label tell you your "ill" (which i still believe it's a difference not illness-right texaschic!)Well, I didn't have a label until it was nasty enough to get one. When I got the label I was horrified and it took a while to get my brain wrapped around it and I still go back to struggling with it sometimes (like now).
I think I understand what you mean about not being too influenced or ruled by labels. Truthfully, deep down I do think it's an illness. At least for me. It's taken a toll on me physically, mentally, psychologically, and impaired my ability to function and caused me to writhe in psychic agony. It just ain't a healthy way to be. But I do need to get out of this mode of feeling ashamed and get back to a mindset where the diagnosis of "mood disorder" isn't more damning than any other.
> i personally prefer affective disorder or just plain Bipolar2,
Yeah,I prefer that as well.
> > Maybe I'm just maxxed out on it.
> BINGO. sometimes i just get SICK of it, it seems like i'm always focused or thinking about my emotions...i get sick of that.I'd definitely like to get to the point where it's a background thing, you know, and not taking up so much of my waking consciousness.
Hmmm....I was just thinking. Maybe I feel the stigma thing right now because I'm not living a normal life. What I mean is, that I think if I had a more balanced life and didn't see myself being nervous and stressed and isolated, I would feel more like a real person and the diagnosis and stigma wouldn't bother me so much. Does that make sense? This out-of-work, trying to get life togehter nonsense is just not fun.
Well, Thursday I'm heaing out of town for a few days to see an old college buddy. Maybe that'll take the edge off things.
> and when you have questions or just want to talk with people who understand...come here, you're ALWAYS Welcome.
Thanks for the support. 'Tis a good place with good folks. :)
cheers,
Emme
poster:Emme
thread:345714
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040507/msgs/345966.html