Posted by fallsfall on March 22, 2004, at 7:19:07
In reply to Dear diary March 21, posted by Ilene on March 21, 2004, at 21:00:03
I think that I had the same problem with CBT that you have. I'm pretty good at reframing things ("this isn't a crisis, it is an opportunity to use my skills"). But I can't just decide that something that matters a great deal to me isn't important. Too much of it seemed like I would need to lie to myself. I don't lie to anyone - least of all myself.
It seems that for many people CBT works really well, and I will say that I did learn lots of important coping techniques. But CBT was NOT going to FIX my problem. It was only going to help me live with my problem.
I hope that over time your husband can start to understand what you are trying to say - or at least believe that what you are saying is true for you even if he doesn't understand why.
I also know about not being able to get "un-upset" easily. Did you do any relaxation exercises in the hospital? This morning I woke up an hour early (5:30AM Ugh) and I was pretty anxious. I have therapy today, and that always winds me up. I had gotten a "Relax to Sleep" tape when I was in the hospital. It is guided imagery (relax your right arm, relax your left arm, etc). So I tried that at 5:30 and it really did help. I know I'll be all wound up again soon, but getting a couple of hours of relief was pretty good.
You really ARE getting things done! I'm quite impressed. Keep posting about your day - I like to see how much you are doing (and I'll cheer you on if you get into a slump). Make sure you read your posts and give yourself credit for the stuff you are doing.
Rah, Rah, Rah! Go, Ilene, Go!