Posted by Karen_kay on February 4, 2004, at 15:58:20
In reply to Learning to like yourself, posted by Penny on February 4, 2004, at 15:31:52
Well, I know I used to hate myself during high school. And I mean hate. I took a break before college and I got away from my mother, who I overheard telling my father, "I hate her. I wish she'd never been born." (Now, she didn't say it to me, she didn't intend for me to hear it at all.) I grew up hating myself because I was surrounded by people who weren't equipped with effective coping skills, and instead took it out on their children.
When I moved out on my own, I realized, "Hey there's more to life than that crap!" I constantly told myself, "I look cute today." I would call my sister and tell her, "Hey, I look cute today." And he would answer, "I know you do!" And she meant it. Even if I didn't believe I was cute, I still told myself I was. And eventually I did believe it. It takes a while, but I started from believing I wasn't even human to thinking I'm absolutely gorgeous (most of the time).. I even tell my boyfriend, "Aren't you lucky to have such a cute girlfriend?" And he always answers, "Yes I am."
*I think that starting with a part that you like (AND EVERYONE loves a natural red head, believe me!!!!) and go from there.... Sorry, but the positive self-talk crap works..... It did for me. It takes a while, but the pay-off is worth it! And also having reinforcement helps as well.... I don't even mind my flaws anymore. I think they kind of add character. Sure, I complain about them, but I'm a complainer. Take after my mother (who I LOVE dearly), you know :)
I'm sure you're beautiful. If your looks are anything like your intelligence or sincerity, then I'm amazed by your beauty!
Also, a tip. I always sit up straight. I walk in a straight line and wiggle my butt (sounds silly, I know, but it helps make me feel sexy, it really does!!), with my chin up. I accept the fact that I'm clumsy, because it adds to my uniqueness. ****Most importantly, do the things that make you feel beautiful! And accept the things that make you unique. Don't try to change them. That's what makes a person beautiful, the fact that we are all unique!