Posted by octopusprime on November 5, 2003, at 0:06:58
In reply to Re: a crossroads/ octo, posted by kara lynne on November 4, 2003, at 14:32:41
hi kara lynne.
i have been well. i have been taking time to drum and read. while i have not been terribly productive or social, i am feeling quite calm.i read your reply. i see the instinctual human fear of change. oh no! change! where's that rock i can hide under while change is happening? ack!
while fear of change is only natural, all we can do is acknowledge it and play on. meditate on it. (how is the meditating going?) bring your fear out of the closet and try to minimize it. personally, while i do fear change, i am very good at ignoring the BIG PINK ELEPHANTS in the room (fear) and playing on. i think it is an acquired skill. stillness frightens me more than change.
now manifestations of fear are real, i have them too. my hands shake when i'm nervous. then again, they shake when i hold full cups of hot liquids. i blame it on the caffeine or advancing parkinsonism <grin> if anybody asks; they rarely do. our bugaboos loom larger in our minds.
now i'll quote and edit:
> As an intern in school ... I'm not saying I didn't have successes because I did.
here is the focus. of course you are learning, and you will not be as good as people who have been practicing for a long time -- that makes you a novice, not a fraud.
focus on the successes and finding them again.
i know it seems like an uphill climb and a struggle.
but the only way to find the happiness you deserve is to put one foot in front of the other and chase the hard successes. it does get easier. promise.i just got back from drum class. the spirit of big booty is watching you. :)
ps - a nice heavyweight linen is always nice for paper. be sure it scans, photocopies, and faxes well!
poster:octopusprime
thread:275840
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031031/msgs/276710.html