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Re: I feel like I want to die without him. emme

Posted by kara lynne on September 15, 2003, at 18:43:02

In reply to Re: I feel like I want to die without him. » kara lynne, posted by Emme on September 15, 2003, at 18:17:13

Hi Emme,

Thank you for coming out of your drug induced state of semi consciousness long enough to respond to me. I thought of you many times during your absence and wondered how you were. I'm glad you're back and doing ok, if semi conscious.

I still want to die. I still want to run to him and make him respond to me. I want to send my letter and have it evoke a real, human response in him rather than a college professor's reply. I want to try until I twist myself inside out trying. The sickest part of me would die trying.

I don't understand why someone wouldn't choose love. Even though I can have it explained to me, and I am a somewhat rational human being while I am hearing about it, I leave and am vexed again eternally. Why wouldn't he have been thrilled at the opportunity for true love? Why wouldn't he want to love me and have me love him?

Because he can't. Because he's sick. But somewhere I just can't help thinking if I only just...
just...
just...
just...

But it's so unjust.

Thank you.


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