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Re: What do (healthy) men look for in a woman? Eddie Sylvano

Posted by Susan J on August 21, 2003, at 15:59:54

In reply to Re: What do (healthy) men look for in a woman?, posted by Eddie Sylvano on August 21, 2003, at 15:41:06

>> To be general, everybody wants someone who is confident and powerful, "good looking" for their gender (men:bigger is better. Military hair. Gold chain or two; women:smaller is better (so is blond hair)), someone who isn't smarter than them, but not too much stupider, and someone who is well liked by others (popular, so to speak). Mate choice seems to be about enhancing one's social standing.
<<LOL. That is a bit cynical. I think the characteristics *I* want in a mate are reasonable and attainable:

1. Attractive TO ME. That can range the gamut.
2. Emotionally healthy, open, communicative.
3. Someone who loves to learn about a variety of things.
4. Someone I have at least some stuff in common.
5. Someone who *gets* me, and whom I *get*. That's the hard part....
>>In short, they're way too critical, and pass over people all the time that they would probably appreciate a great deal if they weren't so neurotic about their desires.
<<I agree in theory, but maybe you could give me an example?

> If you think that the extra weight is an issue, you could lose it, but then you set yourself up for failure later if you gain it back ("you used to look better!"). Weight should be mainly a health concern, between you and your doctor.
<<Trust me, if it were that easy, it would have been done. But I cannot work hard on my mental health, run my household, do a good job at work, pay my bills, and make sure I eat healthy all the time. And for someone who has a weight problem, it is a constant battle. Kind of like depression is for me, too.

And no other health issues. BP is great, I have the lowest triglyceride count my doc's ever seen. Perfect blood sugar levels, high good cholesterol, and in good cardio condition. So, to me, it's a looks thing, not a health thing. Someday (I hope not) it might become a health thing. But it isn't right now.

> Having said all that, I would just suggest that you increase your exposure to other people, maintain a pleasant presence, and perhaps initiate conversations with people you like (and have at least some reason to believe may reciprocate). I've found that waiting for others to act is a guaranteed lock on single life.
<<OK, so, do guys like aggressive women?


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poster:Susan J thread:252745
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030818/msgs/252847.html