Posted by kara lynne on July 21, 2003, at 14:02:02
In reply to Re: And then she blew it. » kara lynne, posted by giget on July 21, 2003, at 8:30:17
You don't have to apologize for anything you say or feel. I understand completely.
If he were really taking responsibility it would be one thing, but he seems ultimately still to want to blame me. I ask my therapist what I'm supposed to say when he throws his "there are two people here..." line at me that he always falls back on. What can you say to that? Of course there are two people here.
She says it's another gaslighting technique--that one person doesn't get to be abusive and then say "well we both have anger issues", as he is doing. And then I get all muddled as I am doing.
I keep trying to resolve something unresolve-able.
I am trying to be strong though. My instinct is to jump every time he leaves me one of those messages--although he would be quick to ignore me if he had something better to do.
It's a tough one, giget. I have no answers. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. (((giget)))