Posted by Mikey_C on February 5, 2003, at 13:24:29
Hey, I'm just wondering what to expect out of this scenario and if any of you have gone through anything similar. First off, I've been diagnosed as being Bi-Polar with Mixed Episodes and having an adjunct Panic Disorder.It's been 6 months since I started treating this disorder and I've already come a loooooong ways. It feels like I've definitely stepped off the Roller-Coaster, however, there are still some missing pieces here for me. I'm not too sure how my medication is going to hold out over the long-term, I'm not entirely thrilled with my Mood Stabilizer since it's been giving me a lot of stomach problems lately, and basically, I just want to make sure that I've got this whole situation under complete control so I can go back to a normal life which I am absolutely craving at the moment.
So, since my Therapist is getting on in the years and is approaching retirement (this June) and my MD is very apt to prescribe anything on his own to help me deal with my situation... I've been referred to a Mood Disorder Specialist at a Hospital in my area.
First off, I'm TERRIFIED of Hospitals. Just the fact that I know I'm going to one has given me this sinking feeling in my stomach. I'm really not happy about it but realize that it's a step that I have to take.
Second... I don't know what to expect out of this meeting. My Therapist has been on Vaction in Asia or something like that since shortly after the Christmas Holidays. She won't be back in time for my meeting with this Dr. at the hospital. Am I going there merely to be evaluated by her to see if I am indeed Bi-Polar? (I'm 100% sure that I am simply by the way that my life has changed since being put on any Mood Stabilizer). Or can this woman actually provide me with some advanced medical advice that I'm seriously lacking over here in Ottawa. I want to make sure that I'm on the best medications to manage my disorder and to get on with my life... but at the moment, I really don't feel that I am. I'm strong enough to keep myself from sliding too far either way, of course with the help of the medications that I'm currently on, but I can still feel it under the surface. Plus, I really think I'm taking too many medications which might be evident that I'm not taking the right ones.
Furthermore, I'm scared of her just taking a look at me and then sending me back out the door for another few months... I need to find that final piece to solve my puzzle... I know I'm damn close to it... and I think I'll finally just snap if she puts me once again on the back burner so I can just sit here and deal with my situation by myself... I've been waiting already for 4 months to see this one particular Doctor... I've been working on improving my situation for the past 8 months... and I'm finally at that point where I really just want to get on with my life... This is sucking my life out of me and within the last few months I've made some great improvements in my life... I can see pretty much the perfect life for me right over the horizon, as soon as I can figure out a way to get past this little obstacle in the road.
Anyways, if any of you can give me some advice on this... what to expect... what to do before hand... if anybody has actually gone through this, please let me know. It will make me and my gf rest a lot easier at night.
Thanks......
poster:Mikey_C
thread:36409
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030201/msgs/36409.html