Posted by bluedog on January 31, 2003, at 10:54:09
In reply to Football , stigma, and divulging your illness, posted by Greg A. on January 30, 2003, at 13:09:24
Greg
I would have to agree with what Judy said in her post. I had exactly the same problems at my work with managers who said they understood but by their actions clearly demonstrated that they didn't.
It was amazing how nice they suddenly became towards me when they realised that I both knew my rights and was willing to stand up for them. At my work we have a HR manager that eventually admitted to me that he knew diddly about depression and had not even had any training in the area (I think this is disgraceful for a professional HR manager)
I actually made an appointment to speak to the CEO about my concerns...I did this in a very non-confrontational way but I did "innocently" ask her for her "advice" as to whether she considered that I may need to seek legal advice or go to the union about some of the concerns I had. I then sent an email to the CEO confirming in writing what we had discussed and cc'd a copy of this email to my direct manager, my area director and to the HR manager. I made sure to mention that I had fulfilled all MY legal obligations and internal policy requirements in keeping my employer fully informed about my illness. I know they were absolutely shell shocked that I had gone straight over all their heads as they were so used to being able to just push me around. I must say I was very proud of myself.
I don't know what happened after that but my HR manager has been as nice as pie to me ever since and actually called me up at home on one of my sick days to apologise for some of the "misunderstandings" that had occurred in our past communications.
BUT most of all do NOT be ashamed about your condition. It took me a long time to get past this feeling of guilt and shame but as soon as people clearly see that you are not ashamed about your condition and are willing to stand up for your rights you will be amazed that in general they will start treating you much more "normally" again. Just remember that there will however always be some true assholes in this world that won't give a damn.
If you don't feel up to the approach I took (and I only took this approach because they had finally pushed me too with some of the things they did and said to me and I was extremely angry at the time) I would at the very least make an appointment to see your local union rep to be fully informed about your rights in your particular situation.
Good Luck and regards
bluedog
poster:bluedog
thread:35944
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030120/msgs/35983.html