Posted by syringachalet on January 17, 2003, at 17:33:17
In reply to Re: What's it mean to you to feel close to someone? » IsoM, posted by mikhail99 on January 17, 2003, at 16:10:07
For me to have a intimate relationship with anyone but my husband is not in the cards for me right now.
My hubby and I have physical closeness as he helps me with those things both around the house and my personal care that help me/us function as a couple and a team. In 20 years of marriage, lust has been replaced with mature love; passion has been replaced with compassion and trust and tolerance were earned by us both along the way...
Most of the people I talk to share with me the one thing they fear most in a relationship is rejection. It is that rejection that keeps them from reaching out to those who need their caring and attention as much (or more) than they do.
You mention eariler that being comfortable with silence in a relationship. I was just listening to a country music song on the radio by Aliason Crouse that was titled, You Say It Best When You Say Nothing At All. It descrribes all the different non-verbal ways we tell( and more importantly show) how much we care about someone.
I feel, for me, it basically comes down to vulnerability issues. That to open yourself up to someone else and risk their acceptance or rejection is often more than most of us can bare.
I have found PSB a "soft place to land" where I might not be wonderful or'normal' but I am accepted and tolerated. It is also a place that I get a 'gentle reality check' when needed from those whom are 'in the trenches with me".
Also it shows that those here care enough about one another to show 'honesty with kindness"...Just my thoughts.......
syringachalet
poster:syringachalet
thread:35372
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030111/msgs/35409.html