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Re: Cycles and triggers--Dinah

Posted by ROO on October 21, 2002, at 11:33:22

In reply to Re: Cycles and triggers » ROO, posted by Dinah on October 21, 2002, at 10:27:19

>>
> Any ideas?

Well I have some insights...and I can most definitely relate...but
I'm not sure how helpful I can really be....whenever I feel most frustrated by
all this mental illness stuff, I pull out my spiritual zen hat...and I hope this
doesn't annoy you...it might me, if I were you...but it's about acceptance...of everything...
including our own powerlessness...and let's face it...at some point, we are powerless over
this shit. I think you can drive yourself absolutely nuts trying to analyze it to death, figure it
all out, mood charting yourself to death...at some point you've got to take a big deep breath and
let go of trying to figure it all out...at least for a couple of moments...and ironically letting go of
trying to figure it all out usually allows you to gain some sort of powerful insight...because TRYING too
hard makes things impossible (ever watch Lavern and Shirely where Lavern is trying to unlock the door
and she can't she's trying to force the key in the lock and she's going crazy jiggling it and shaking it
to death and yelling and screaming and it won't open and Shirley cooly walks up and calmly and gently
moves the key and the door opens and she says 'don't force' or something like that)....

On the medical side...I asked you this earlier, are you sure when you are cycling like this, that you don't
need to increase your mood stabilizer? Because that helps me when I start getting that agitated feeling...I just
increase the mood stabilizer and that takes care of it....

You seem very familiar with these cycles...how long do they usually last?


> I hate it, I really do.


See...I also think this is part of the problem...and it brings up another zen maxim...which
is there's really nothing wrong with feeling unhappy...it's when you HATE feeling unhappy
that it really becomes hell on earth. If you could work on, while youre having these cycles, on a feeling
of acceptance..."Okay...I'm cycling...I'm feeling shitty right now...I don't like it...but it's happening", and work
on dropping the intense hatred, shame and embarrassement, you might decrease your discomfort level by
about 50%....

I always feel like a big hypocrite giving advice. I know how much
it sucks. I feel for you and I'm with you, babe.



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